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Nursery worker admits to raping children, but denies sexualising them 0
Qoxiivi 3 years

Hopefully no more soon...

Spanish cucumbers and German bean sprouts to sue for libel. 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years
Cure for obesity depends on a post code lottery......Hmmmm fat chance! 0
arnied 3 years
Super Injection - The latest in Privacy Management Solutions 0
AdamSloan 3 years

Having problems keeping your misdemeanours private? Concerned about the impact that crazy night might have on your global earnings and sponsorship deals? Alarmed by recent social media and...

Steve Jobs to Personally Negotiate 
with St. Peter for the Rights to "iCloud" 0
mbalton 3 years

Apple CEO Steve Jobs is hastening his arrival at the Pearly Gates, so he can personally negotiate with St. Peter for the rights to the name “iCloud.” When Apple launched its new iCloud product...

Apple launch ‘new’ product – the iWheel 5
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Following on from the announcement of Apple’s iCloud service, and sticking with their policy of producing ‘new’ products that are remarkably similar to ones that are already available and then...

Meerkats seek name upgrade to Muchmorethankat 1
simonjmr 3 years
Halifax adverts rot the brain – official 3
Dick Everyman 3 years

The chief medical officer has written to the Advertising Standards Authority expressing concern that prolonged exposure to Halifax adverts is causing brain rot in the 18 to 65 year age group. ...

Bad light stops play at Snooker Finals. Organiser blames energy-efficient bulbs 15
pinxit 3 years
R.Cow Patz to star in Vampire Dairies 0
Dick Everyman 3 years

Teenage heart throb R.Cow Patz is to join the cast of ‘Vampire Dairies’ the latest incarnation in the popular genre of teen horror TV offerings. Set in darkest Shropshire it has been described...

Pollution at all-time high despite token recycling efforts; middle class baffled 12
pthr 3 years

Middle class couples everywhere were surprised and dismayed to learn that last year was the worst on record for global carbon emissions. For reasons that are not yet clear, household composting...

Fresh evidence leads to calls for a new inquiry into Humpty Dumpty tragedy 7
ronseal 3 years

Senior sources among all the Kings Army and All the Kings Men fear they are being hung out to dry, as a trial by media seeks a scapegoat for the tragic death of Humpty Dumpty. My Dumpty, known only...

Pensioner declares Starbucks coffee "worth every penny" 0
Re Pete 3 years

Agnes Meadows, an 83-year-old resident of Kilburn in North West London, shocked family and friends by insisting that the £3.19 Skinny Grande Vanilla Latte she bought in a local Starbucks was...

“Ugly and unpopular” boy who “won’t be missed” unexpectedly makes full recovery 5
Qoxiivi 3 years
Football hits new low as Peter Crouch says he's still committed to England Team. 0
seymour totti 3 years

More Soon!...

Charity claims iCloud name 'insulting to people with cataracts' 0
3 years
Sony to sponsor the Red Cross, Magic Circle, Times Square and Bermuda Triangle 0
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Part time cycling lane to open on M1 2
Dick Everyman 3 years

A rush hour experiment begins in July with the opening up of a new part time cycling lane on the M1. Cyclists will be able to use the nearside lane, traditionally called ‘the slow lane’ between...

BBC announces 90's based follow-up to 'Life on Mars ' 5
Smaug 3 years

A spokesperson for BBC drama has announced the long-anticipated third series of 'Life on Mars'. Following on from previous runs set in the 70's and 80's, the show will follow CID in Coventry during...

Crop circles discovered in Boris Johnson’s thatch 0
Dick Everyman 3 years

In a guest interview on Desert Island Discs on Sunday, Mayor of London, Boris Johnson revealed that he may have had an alien encounter after crop circles were discovered in his hair last summer. ...

Government to execute extremists 0
virtuallywill 3 years

That'll show them...

Queen opens Welsh assembly 0
virtuallywill 3 years

http://i182.photobucket.com/albums/x43/Rodriguez_Prime/QueenLive1.jpg...

Daleks endorse Osborne's economic policy 0
The Paper Ostrich 3 years

Chancellor George Osborne has welcomed the endorsement of his economic policy by the Daleks, the intergalactic robotic killers and respected financial experts. In an independent report, the Daleks...

Red Faced teenage boys organise "Smutwalk" in support of porn buying friend 0
simonjmr 3 years
Council houses tenancy not to be kept within families:William and Kate to object 0
virtuallywill 3 years

Kensington Palace, not Anglesey...

Auditions for ‘Maid in Manhattan 2’ now closed 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Stage blunder leaves 300 stupefied: we won’t book Cheryl Cole again, vow bosses 0
FraserWords 3 years
The Independent launches new paper for Newcastle: 'The Whay-i' 0
Skylarking 3 years

More soon, like...

Inappropriate snaps of Weiner popping out in pants appear on Twitter 0
simonjmr 3 years
Beetles used to create Red Bull now a protected species 0
gaijintendo 3 years

The Red Bull product look likely to change formula this month given that the [i]Limoniscus violaceus[/i] whose blood gives Red Bull its distinctive flavour, has been recognised as a protected species...