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All references to BIG BEN now must be written in Italics 1
Rowly 3 years

[i]BIG BEN [/i]more later...

West Ham lose ebay auction for Olympic stadium to mystery bidder 'Cambs€101' 0
button 3 years
Saw 8 flops after Jigsaw bows to health and safety regulations 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Fans of excessively gory horror films with ludicrous plots have been left disappointed by the latest instalment of the popular Saw franchise. Saw 8, developed in secret amongst much speculation,...

Tate Modern to host Hollywood Blockbusters and Bowling from 2012 1
kga6 3 years

As modern art becomes increasingly indistinguishable from looking at every day objects being used in their natural environment, the Tate Modern has admitted that soon it will no longer be financially...

Mcartney admits Nancy had been acting as a "go between" during previous marriage 1
Rowly 3 years

less chance of rolling off, /'\ rather than /'...

OK to make jokes about disabilities of people you don't like, research finds 0
DrTurmoil 3 years
Turn to the Far Right "Accidental" says Paulo di Canio 0
medici2471 3 years
"Inflation out of control - shoe bill doubled" says McCartney 2
andhrimnir 3 years
Royal Mail withdraws UK Landmarks stamp series in terror threat fears 0
pere floza 3 years
Tescos deny encouraging murderers to shop at Asda 1
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
Fantatist Dr Fox and Werrity 0
simonjmr 3 years
Migrants may soon teach history in UK schools 0
roybland 3 years
Liam Fox can't be sacked because, and I'm not making this up, he has a cat! 0
bonjonelson 3 years


BBC claims Big Ben leaning to right, parliamentary debate demanded 0
witless 3 years

In a biased news story yesterday, the BBC caused a furore by claiming that Big Ben is leaning to the right. Labour spokesman Timothy Tide disputes the report and claims that “from my view point,...

Essex girl gives birth after double doner kebab 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years

Inspired by Amber Miller who ran the Chicago Marathon and then gave birth, Chelsea Trivett, 15, was already 2 weeks overdue when she opted to go for the famed Mighty Micky's Munch Bar Double Doner...

Pricks from Slough branch leave bitter taste in Blackberry crumble 0
Gerontius 3 years

‘RIM can kiss my arse’ say smartphone users, Blackberry inundated with letters of complaint...

Covent Garden Hen Party warned not to goose Peter Hichens 3
ronseal 3 years

Revellers who choose to let their hair down in Covent Garden have been warned that Peter Hitchens, who has been spotted in the area, may not see the funny side of being goosed. One man, who saw the...

Abominable snowman discovery sparks fears he'll seek asylum and jump house queue 0
ronseal 3 years

A story in the Daily Mail that the Abominable Snowman is about to be unveiled has provoked a furious reader response, with letter writers complaining he will seek asylum, jump to the head of the...

Cameron urges crackdown on visitors to MoD 0
roybland 3 years

Prime Minister David Cameron has announced a crackdown on unauthorized visitors to the Ministry of Defence.,  , He said he wants 'everyone in the country' to 'help reclaim our Minstry of Defence...

Psychic Sally claims she heard voices transmitted to device in her right ear 1
roybland 3 years

The woman who says she is 'Britain's best-loved psychic' has made the incredible claim that she can hear messages transmitted to an earpiece in her right ear.,  , Sally Morgan has threatened legal...

BBC animator drops major clanger 0
vertical 3 years

A Small Blue Planet meeting erupted as news emerged that Oliver Postgate has dropped certain clangers from Enter the Soup Dragon, the forthcoming movie based on his tv series. 'Some clangers don't...

Cuppa and a nice sit down latest wonder cure, doctor reveals 10
Clarky 3 years

A Wymondham GP claims to have stumbled on a simple wonder cure against most common ailments. Dr Jolyon Fletcher takes up the story: ‘I’d been shopping with my wife, Marigold, and got home...

The more he dug, the deeper into the hole the not-so-Fantastic Dr Fox sank 1
Clarky 3 years

With apologies to R Dahl...

Aled Jones secures sponsorship deal with Pukka Pies. More soon. 1
Al OPecia 3 years

Dancing in the Air may prove "problematical"...

NZ government admit oil spill was supposed to coincide with All Blacks Cup exit 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years

no doubt more spilt soon...

New Zealand dwarves deny throwing Tuilagi overboard in revenge attack 1
Midfield Diamond 3 years
PCSO arrested for impersonating a police officer 0
Perks 3 years
Company to sue New Zealand for "damaging oil" 0
apepper 3 years

The owner of the Cargo ship [i]Rena [/i]is to sue New Zealand for recompense for the damage caused to it's ship and fuel oil. "First of all, New Zealand has pointy rocks all around it which are an...

Bell-end to open Olympics 0
simonjmr 3 years

Peter Smallings generally acknowledged by his peers as an insufferable bellend has been picked to open the 2012 London Olympics. "Mr Smallings (43) is an insufferable oafish bore, who will recount...

Blackberry Jam 0
Sinnick 3 years

[not original, borrowed from a BBC subscriber]...