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Man wins a monkey at William Hill 'bet and pet' night 2
kga6 3 years

In a daring bid to get children gambling from an earlier age, William Hill has begun trial evenings termed 'bet and pet' nights. Parents who have no one to watch their child while they gamble, forgot...

F1 boss 'catalyst' for human genome research 2
Perks 3 years

Today the International Human Genome Sequencing Consortium has made the startling revelation that the only reason it started to look at and map the human genome was because of a chance meeting...

Somali pirates blame 'Health and Safety gone mad' for downturn. 11
bonjonelson 3 years

Pirates operating off the coast of Somalia have blamed "Overregulation" and an over-zealous attitutde to enforcement of Health and Safety rules for their recent lack of success in major piracy...

Apple launches iVinyl Store in bid to end Vinyl sharing 1
roybland 3 years

Apple's launch of its long-awaited iVinyl Store has been welcomed by the music industry as a solution to the problem of Vinyl sharing. 'It's a great day for us,' said a spokesman for Sony...

Brian Cox to present "Wonders of the Olympics" 1
Sinnick 3 years
Agility dog catches thief on obstacle course. 0
Al OPecia 3 years

Persistent small time thief, Ronnie Allsop, has been detained and charged after trying to outwit an agility trained dog when snatching his owners purse. "i thought I could get away with it" said...

Murderers of man found shot, beheaded and set on fire accused of overkill. 1
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years
"That's nearly as much as I got for an episode of HIGNFY" 0
yussle 3 years

Says an outraged Boris...

Celebrity food critic goes missing. 0
Marko 3 years

Police are concerned at the whereabouts of pie and pudding connossieur Jack Horner, who was last seen sat in a corner...

Red Hot Chili's 0
Marko 3 years

Peter Piper at large again as a peck of pickled peppers goes missing...

Controversial 'musical Austrian cellar' theme for Olympic ceremony 0
hughesroland 3 years
Cameron puts Clegg in charge of sorting chocolate oranges 0
cinquecento 3 years
RBS Chief has contract clause that allows bonus to be paid in Children's Teeth 5
SimonJJames 3 years

Royal Bank of Scotland (RBS) boss Stephen Hester is to receive a bonus of almost one million children's teeth. RBS announced on Thursday that Mr Hester is to get 963,000 children's teeth, the money...

NASA 100m champion fails drug test after traces of A Steroid found in sample 2
charlies_hat 3 years

would this be better as "Asteroid" ?...

New Duchy Originals fungi range praised as "Pretty f***ing trippy, man!" 0
Al McHogan 3 years
Jokes about whether Murray is British or Scottish are 'definitely British' 4
Oxbridge 3 years

More as soon as he loses...

Dramatic RBS share price increase expected following payment of share bonus 0
medici2471 3 years
Murray in Australian Open drugs shocker 0
Marko 3 years

Andy Murray, the Scottish tennis player, has failed a drugs test after being beaten in the semi final of the Australian Open today. It is believed however that he will not face a ban, as the...

'Andy has a disappointing semi', claims Murry's girlfriend 10
Immunis 3 years
Doctors tell distressed woman who found lump 'he's your husband' 5
dicky37 3 years

[more soon]...

Andy Murray fails in bid to win Australian Open 1
medici2471 3 years
French presidential candidate promise payout to single mums with only 4 children 1
Ostsee 3 years
Fatties to be taxed more 0
Marko 3 years

In what will be seen as most as another 'stealth tax', Andrew Lansley, Secretary of state for Health, is to introduce a tax levy on overweight and obese people., Speaking yesterday, Mr Lansley said...

Snack Giant Sponsors Olympic "Isles of Golden Wonder" Opening Ceremony 0
Spanswick.Milton 3 years
Outrage at RBS boss SHeister's bonus 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Miliband criticised for criticising Cameron about Chocolate Orange promises 1
kimllfixit 3 years

Ed Miliband this morning took a bashing from government and news officials, as his main swipe at David Cameron was solely that he hadn’t confronted the sales of cut-price Terry’s Chocolate...

Kwik Fit admit ‘you won’t be amazed at what we do - we just sell tyres’ 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years
Internet found me hot women in my area, says grateful solo Arctic explorer 1
Oxbridge 3 years
Geordies saddened by lack of Turtles in "Total Wipeout" 2
seymour totti 3 years
Competitors say Starbucks’ expansion plan ‘is just so much froth’ 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years