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UKIP Denies That It Is "Dozy" and "Thatcherite".

"UKIP if you want to" kwipped Nigel Farage "[i]This[/i] party's not for kipping."...

Titus 13.03.14 6:03pm
Joke page> Middle East Peace envoy still employed

, still paid, handsomely no doubt...

Robert Koch 13.03.14 5:49pm
Robert Koch
Missing Airliner Mystery Deepens As Passengers' Luggage Turns Up At Beijing

"A clear indication" said a spokesman "that the airliner must have changed course, with the passengers expecting to arrive at a completely different destination from their luggage."...

Titus 13.03.14 5:48pm
Iain Duncan Smith found wandering in Downing Street with his compassion cut off

A middle aged conservative was found wandering in a confused state in the Westminster area after his compassion was removed in what seems to have been a viscious attack. The entire country has been...

halfironmum 13.03.14 5:05pm
NASA developing "fat air" so that things will stop disappearing into thin air. 0
Maverick 13.03.14 4:05pm
Malaysia Airlines flight: David Copperfield arrested 0
sydalg 13.03.14 4:01pm
Boeing finally admits that MH370 is a new stealth passenger plane. 0
Maverick 13.03.14 3:55pm
Ninja banned from 'Stars In Their Eyes' 2
cinquecento 13.03.14 3:16pm
Psycadelic Squirrel
Man who had sex with pig claims relationship was monhogamous 0
sydalg 13.03.14 2:17pm
Surprising numbers still take bait from KatyHopkins says study - mostly oiks tho 0
ronseal 13.03.14 2:16pm
"Heston Blumenthal recipe defence" fails as woman jailed for microwaving cat

no seconds please...

Not Amused 13.03.14 2:07pm
Not Amused
"Sea part of axis of evil" says Fox News

Renowned US Neo-Con "news" journalist Donna Undblitzen calls for dramatic military intervention following the loss of the Malaysian airliner. "If there is evidence to suggest that the sea is in some...

Andy Gilder 13.03.14 1:58pm
Andy Gilder
Frozen sperm fight ends in victory

Fertility clinic concedes defeat after one of its barristers was hit in the eye with cubes of sub-zero jizz...

Andy Gilder 13.03.14 1:48pm
Andy Gilder
Malaysian Authorities bring in dart boards, maps and straws to help search 0
Bigglesworth 13.03.14 1:18pm
Malyasian Authorities Admit MH 370 Briefing was Crap

It has now been acknowledged that the briefing was of very poor standard, but unfortunately they had all lost their notes...

Rumour Control 13.03.14 12:36pm
Rumour Control
Heathrow T2 opening may be delayed "Until luggage can be lost reliably"

Delays in the luggage loss systems of the forthcoming Terminal 2 may delay opening, a spokesman warned. "At the check in", he said, "labels to the destination are being clearly printed, and then...

steve_l 13.03.14 12:26pm
Robert Koch
Dessert thief held in custardy.

Not to be trifled with...

FOAD 13.03.14 11:52am
Upstart young geometrician is the Euclid on the block 0
Smart Alex 13.03.14 11:26am
Smart Alex
RMT announce Bob Crow's coffin will be carried on a replacement bus service.

More soon.

MADJEZ 13.03.14 11:00am
Heaven on strike

Bob Crow brings heaven out on strike Heaven is staging a series of twenty-four hour stoppages after Bob Crow balloted angels over terms and conditions, according to reports. Crow is said to be...

Gary Stanton 13.03.14 10:56am
Midfield Diamond
Latest UKIP scandal reveals plan to form new political party

Highly skilled investigative reporters interviewing sacked employees of the organisation revealed today a secret plan to form a new political party. "We thought all they were doing was organising a...

vulture1 13.03.14 10:43am
Cameron Worried Re Cosmetic Cost Rises….

…Miners advise, a shift down t'pit...

Jesse Bigg 13.03.14 9:53am
Jesse Bigg
A nation remembers WW1 Glove-Puppeteers

While English professors and people who mourn the loss of pipe-smoking focus their attention on the poets of 1914-18, some contemporary historians feel more should be done to commemorate the loss of...

Wrenfoe 13.03.14 9:47am
Man City 'Quadruple' dream ridiculed by Chinese maths teacher 0
Lenny Bee 13.03.14 9:30am
Lenny Bee
Kraft Cheese Wins An Award…...

…From a flat-pack company...

Jesse Bigg 13.03.14 9:24am
Jesse Bigg
Pistorius working hard to bring back "down to earth" paralympian 0
Bigglesworth 13.03.14 9:23am
New Council Set Up In West Yorkshire, Despite Problems Over Name…..


Jesse Bigg 13.03.14 9:19am
Jesse Bigg
Church 'Worried About Reverse Chancel Charges'

In a twist of fate, the Dioceses of Shrewsbury which recently served a Chancel Repair Liability notice on private houses within a parish church boundary has found itself served the same notice from...

throngsman 13.03.14 9:06am
Petrol stations help in search for missing plane, collect clues when you fill up 0
Bigglesworth 13.03.14 8:28am
Howzat? Pistorius hits own stumps with cricket bat

Defence lawyer makes silly point as experts hit case for six...

Damien_H 13.03.14 8:12am