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Scotland to introduce minimum pricing for batter.

More casual racism soon...

TheNewsWalrus 01.12.12 8:00am
Andrew Flintoff Fails Breathalyser Test During F1 Debut

The world of motorsport was left reeling last night as news emerged that ex England and Lancashire cricketer Andrew Fintoff was disqualified from taking part in The British Grand Prix at Silverstone...

Jonny Shlep 01.12.12 4:59am
Jonny Shlep
Spearmint Hippo, the first lap-dancing club for chubbies, opens in Hull...

Locals on Withernsea Road in Hull are watching with interest as a new lap-dancing club opens up in their neighbourhood. Spearmint Hippo claims to offer something new in the ‘bit like sex, but not...

Tripod 30.11.12 10:46pm
ricky gervaise found to have multiple user names on newsbiscuit - 2

must be him!, he's the only twat who would use the term "mentals" in supposedly satirical pieces. surely?...

arthurminnit 30.11.12 9:31pm
Stanleys Dad
Lord Leveson filming 'Gangnam style video' to promote press report 0
custard cream 30.11.12 7:33pm
custard cream
F1 teams go to Qwik Fit in bid to find tyres that will last more than 70 miles

A number of Formula One teams are looking into the possibility of sourcing their tyres from Qwik Fit as they attempt to find tyres that will actually last race distance. According to insider sources...

Smart Alex 30.11.12 6:46pm
Smart Alex
Glamour model works up a froth at Cornish museum

When twenty two year old glamour model Arabella Mason took on the role of a costumed guide at the Manor Farm Museum in Cornwall little did she realise how much it would change her life. Unable to...

Dick Everyman 30.11.12 4:58pm
Queen of Tarts
Nah, not funny 9
dvo4fun 30.11.12 4:10pm
Hmm, who to trust? MPs/Press? Press/MPs? MPs/Press? Press/MPs? ...... KABOOM!!

More later...

dvo4fun 30.11.12 3:59pm
2 hurt by shrapnel in Christmas cracker factory explosion 0
Nails UK 30.11.12 3:36pm
Nails UK
Manchester wins "Most Piraty UK" Competition

Celebration yesterday as Manchester beat stiff competition from Nottingham and Southampton be confirmed as representing Britain in this years International "Most Piraty" Competition., Previous...

Stick Man 30.11.12 3:35pm
Stick Man
New supermarket 'yo-yo' pricing agreement comes with strings attached. 0
weematt 30.11.12 2:59pm
Leveson findings: the only way is ethics 4
Clarky 30.11.12 2:58pm
Leveson debate: Clegg page 3 proposal creates stiff opposition. 0
weematt 30.11.12 2:40pm
Best Movember moustache winner bristling with pride. 0
weematt 30.11.12 2:25pm
Man in flooded house accused of wetting his bed!

[size=15] floods & wets crazy! [/size]...

Bourbon 30.11.12 2:18pm
Man with small penis having sex with a polo accused of 'poking a menthol'

I hope no one here uses mouthwash, sorry in advance As for taking the piss out of people with a small penis, I am allowed to take the piss because I have, I mean, my best friend is a small penis...

Perks 30.11.12 1:41pm
Clown cars recalled...

Responding to a campaign by dissatisfied owners, the Acme Clown Car Company is recalling some of its cars. The vehicle recall affects clown cars in the prestigious Barnum & Bailey range, which...

Tripod 30.11.12 1:12pm
Disney to adapt entire Haynes car repair manual series for the big screen

Hot off the heels of their $4bn purchase of Lucasfilm, Disney have snapped up the rights to the entire Haynes car repair manual series for £759 following a fraught eBay auction earlier today....

Curbie Firetank 30.11.12 11:03am
UKIP second in byelection: 22% of Rotheram children to be put in care homes. 1
Ian 30.11.12 11:01am
Ukip vote up cos people think they is an insomnia charity

UKIP = you kip as in kip meaning sleep God I'm good...

Bourbon 30.11.12 10:52am
Guide: What's the Leveson Inquiry all about?

A report has accused some newspapers of wreaking "havoc" with the lives of innocent people and recklessly "prioritising sensational stories"., Lord Justice Leveson called for a new body (one with a...

simonjmr 30.11.12 10:52am
Cameron proposed Rupert Murdoch as press regulator

In shocking change of direction, David Cameron announced that he now accepts the need for a legally backed press regulation authority -and proposed one "R. Murdoch" to be made "press regulator for...

steve_l 30.11.12 10:18am
Crack cocaine contains 'Worrying levels of salt' say anti-salt campaigners 1
antharrison 30.11.12 10:12am
Dyno Rod on standby as Movember ends. 0
weematt 30.11.12 9:58am
Gingham style hits Isle of Wight dance halls. 5
malgor 30.11.12 9:11am
Dick Everyman
Guardian upgrades Israel's status to "Literally worse than Hitler" 0
Gaz 30.11.12 2:05am
Simon Cowell buys entire press & government, fates to be decided on X Factor 0
Gaz 30.11.12 2:03am
PCC to be renamed PCC on Sunday 0
Gaz 30.11.12 1:59am
UN upgrades Palestinian status to 'terrorists'

lots more soon...

nostra da mouse 30.11.12 12:35am
nostra da mouse