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Woman who dialled the number of the beast horrified to be calling Ian Brady 0
AReader 13.09.13 10:38pm
AReader
Former Post Master General has apoplectic fit over Royal Mail privatisation. 1
Al OPecia 13.09.13 9:52pm
FlashArry
YouTube fires employee for not watching videos during meetings 0
Dumbnews 13.09.13 9:28pm
Dumbnews
Ray Dolby's death to be marked by minute's noise reduction 13
Idiot 13.09.13 7:13pm
Al OPecia
Fights Start Between Indian Liberals Over 'Death Sentence For Rape' Decision 0
Titus 13.09.13 7:05pm
Titus
President Obama to Cut Education Funding in "Polarizing" Move

In a highly polarizing move, President Obama announced he is using his executive powers to cut federal education funding by 50% in order to install polarized windows in the White House. When reached...

2
xbuckethead 13.09.13 6:48pm
xbuckethead
Panda Cub Birth Delayed 'Until There's Some Bad News To Bury'.

More later. Or possibly not...

0
Titus 13.09.13 6:41pm
Titus
Ray Dolby dies surrounded by friends and family; 3 at the front, 2 at the rear

More to follow...

1
apepper 13.09.13 6:36pm
AReader
Foiled Santander Computer Raid Betrayed By Suspiciously Prompt Transactions

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/santander-twelve-held-over-plot-2270624...

0
Titus 13.09.13 6:31pm
Titus
‘Qatari Football: the Glory Years’ now published in ‘tea-towel format’... 0
Tripod 13.09.13 6:22pm
Tripod
US has nagging feeling there was something they were supposed to remember today. 4
phil_smith 13.09.13 5:50pm
thisisall1word
NASA Faces $86bn Roaming Charge For Voyager Communications 3
Titus 13.09.13 4:48pm
Skylarking
DHL wins contract to deliver Royal Mail Share Packs. 3
Boutros 13.09.13 4:06pm
Arthur
Prince George on Tian Tian stand-by

Prince George may be exhibited at Edinburgh Zoo if Tian Tian the panda fails to give birth. The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have already hinted at the arrangement which is hoped will raise money...

0
roybland 13.09.13 3:29pm
roybland
Interstellar Independence Party demands stronger border controls. 0
Ref Minor 13.09.13 2:52pm
Ref Minor
Astronomer Appalled By Google Results For 'Heavenly Bodies' Search

And not a single Uranus joke!...

0
Flugelbinder 13.09.13 2:39pm
Flugelbinder
Mr Kipling exposed as massive dough mixing machine

Cake lovers across the UK were this morning in a state of shock on discovering that 'Mr Kipling' is not the kind elderly baker they pictured, but an industrial size dough mixing machine with a...

0
roybland 13.09.13 2:32pm
roybland
Ofsted Methods Not Accurate Says OfstOfst

The Office for Standards In the Office for Standards has today suggested that the Office For Standards in Education's methods of evaluation are not accurate. "We should know" said Prof Peter...

2
Flugelbinder 13.09.13 2:26pm
Flugelbinder
Morrissey Pulls Autobiography For Being Too Upbeat

Morose soon...

5
Flugelbinder 13.09.13 2:20pm
Midfield Diamond
Bookmakers Slash Odds On Sleeping Man Waking Up 0
Flugelbinder 13.09.13 2:04pm
Flugelbinder
Syria Disappointed With Iraq's Returns Policy

Syria have complained to the UN about Iraq's policy on returning unwanted goods. It seems some time ago they acquired a variety of weapons from their good neighbour Iraq during an 'everything must...

2
Flugelbinder 13.09.13 2:04pm
Sinnick
William's taking gap year as "practise for his career of doing bugger all"

More to follow...

0
apepper 13.09.13 1:12pm
apepper
Insurance companies to insist on risk assessment before each car journey

From the beginning of October, insurance companies will insist on all car drivers submitting a risk report of their journey before they set off. A spokeswoman for the body which represents car...

0
John Wiltshire 13.09.13 12:59pm
John Wiltshire
Infentor of Bolby noif rebuction dief aged eighty yearf olb 0
Skylarking 13.09.13 12:52pm
Skylarking
God signs for Huddersfield Town

Struggling Championship side Huddersfield Town’s manager, Mark Robins, expressed his delight today at the form of their new signing God. “He gets Himself into the most brilliant positions”...

4
blacklesbianandproudofit 13.09.13 12:50pm
beau-jolly
Last Remaining Beast Wary Of Evil Shenanigans

"665 of us have perished already" revealed the beast from his comfortable bedsit in Canterbury., "And we were supposed to be immortal.. Go Figure!" he mused, clearly tired of defending himself...

0
Flugelbinder 13.09.13 11:42am
Flugelbinder
Prince George facing 'bleak future' as both parents now declared unemployed

The future is looking 'decidedly grim' for Prince George this week after his father announced his decision to leave his secure job, forcing the second in-line to the throne to be raised in a no...

0
Jesus H 13.09.13 10:32am
Jesus H
John and George tell Paul and Ringo to "hurry up" for posthumous reunion 0
sydalg 13.09.13 10:10am
sydalg
Gareth Bale ‘too valuable’ to be risked in matches...

Carlo Ancelotti, manager of Real Madrid, has admitted that Gareth Bale, the most expensive footballer in the world, is now too valuable to play in matches. “The player is fully ensured - third...

0
Tripod 13.09.13 10:10am
Tripod
MP's accused of playing the Family Fortune game

A major new MP’s expense scandal erupted in the press to over politicians employing family member in key support roles whilst paying then salaries only Championship footballers would dream of. The...

0
Scronnyglonkle 13.09.13 10:04am
Scronnyglonkle