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Mini Cooper estate is more of a back yard say motoring journalists. 0
martin2381 3 years
Man-flu epidemic averted as Bird-flu wouldn't let him out 1
Perks 3 years
Junk falling from sky not our space ship say Chinese. 1
greg various 3 years
"No stairway" signs in decline in music shops as Adele tops list 0
simonjmr 3 years
Countdown contestant's submission of "felch", left a nasty taste in the mouth 0
simonjmr 3 years

Claims Gameshow host. More soon...

"Heavy Petting" investigated at children's zoo 4
nickb 3 years

Marland's children's zoo in East Sussex  may have  to regulate contact between young visitors and livestock  after health concerns were raised about small children lifting chinchilla  rabbits...

New Met boss offers Guardian journalists get out of jail free cards 0
nickb 3 years

In what is widely regarded as an embarrassing climb down by the Metropolitan Police, Guardian journalists  will be offered a six month immunity from gratuitous prosecution. The news comes after all...

Michael Winner marries himself 0
nickb 3 years

"All my life I have been looking for someone who could understand me.  Accept me for what I am.  Someone sympathetic,  giving, intelligent and in their own way, beautiful.  One night,  it came...

Mass plate-mending "unlikely to help Greece crisis" 0
nickb 3 years

You can see them in the kitchens of tavernas and restaurants the world over.  With the heady smell of superglue masking the familiar smokey fragrance of kebabs they hunch over piles of tragic...

Tesco now officially owns 'every fucking thing' 6
Oxbridge 3 years

Tesco CEO Sir Terry Leahy has announced that, after completing the acquisition of the Co-Op and the Happy Garden Chinese takeaway in Bromsgrove, it now owns every fucking thing in the whole fucking...

Beware of Greeks bearing interest. 2
rikkor 3 years
Jethro Tull, Breakup..... 1
Jesse Bigg 3 years

.To re-concentrate on development of seed drills...

"What's An Apple Pie Bed?"....... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

.Says university fresher, with big holes in his sheets...

"What's An 'Apple Pie Says University Fresher..... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years
Spectators demand money back as child fight deemed 'not dangerous' 0
Screenie 3 years

The organisers of a cage fight involving two boys under the age of ten have received a backlash from members of the public after they suggested the fight was ‘not dangerous’ to either of the boys...

World stock markets crash on news of REM split 0
grottymonty 3 years
Children celebrate only 92 sleepless nights until the Dr Who Christmas special. 0
Ian Searle 3 years

Then loads more afterwards!...

Child Cage-Fighters to be locked up and beaten if they do it again 0
Ian Searle 3 years

That'll learn em!...

Titanic Re-enactment Society Members' Conclusion.... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

."Leaving the lifeboats and getting back on the 'mockup Titanic', same as voting for a Tory government."...

Hospitals 'On Brink Of Collapse' only kept standing by MRSA bugs holding hands 0
Ian Searle 3 years

According to a new report - the old ones are the best - gag switching is not a crime!...

Super hero lead for Expedia's new ad campaign dies from exposure to Samsonite 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years
Bodyform to sue BBC over themetune for new Tara Fitzgerald series 0
Iamthestig 3 years
Death in Georgia confirmed as REM split 1
simonjmr 3 years
U2 finally table Sunday Bloody Sunday compensation offer 0
simonjmr 3 years
'Oh everyone's upset about execution without fair trial NOW', huffs Al Qaeda. 1
DrTurmoil 3 years
'Everybody Hurts' explains Michael Stipe 0
SpankyMonkey 3 years
Assange fury over book leak 'definitely not double standards' 0
SpankyMonkey 3 years
Boundary Commission to reassess acceptable behaviour for children 1
simonjmr 3 years

The Boundary Commission will today embark upon consultation with UK parents to redraw what is now considered to be acceptable behaviour for children. "For too long has the Victorian ideal of...

Joey Barton to host Moral Maze 0
Drylaw 3 years

Listeners to BBC Radio 4's weekly Moral Maze programme were surprised last night to hear chairman Michael Buerk close the show by announcing his retirement and the name of his successor. "Henceforth...

"We will continue the search for ironic oxymorons" say American Intellegance 9
Perks 3 years