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Ferguson’s fury at five match ban to result in further five match ban 0
Gary Stanton 3 years

Sir Alex Ferguson’s furious reaction to his latest five match ban could see the beetroot-faced Scot condemned to the stands for another five matches, the FA confirmed last night. Ferguson’s...

Italy gains EU Protected Designation of Origin for 'Decent Waiters'. 1
3 years
Fashion police nab airline passenger wearing pajamas 1
Dumbnews 3 years
McDonalds Implicated in Drive Thru Puking 2
3 years

PS Will whoever started this craze please, err, stop starting crazes like this. I hope I don't need to remind you to remember not to forget to stop starting. Thank You!...

Police hunt gangsta owls after drive-by hooting... 2
be reasonable 3 years
Lada 'needed new gearbox' after drive by Putin. 1
malgor 3 years
I wandered lonely as a cloud 2
mr blue 3 years

That floats on high o'er vales and hills,, When all at once I saw a crowd,, A host, of golden aargh stop hitting me with that truncheon...

"On Golden Pond" Voted Best Incontinence Film...... 2
Jesse Bigg 3 years
Wife puts her marriage out to tender 12
Des and Stan 3 years

Council administrator Rhona White has put her marriage out to tender, expressing dissatisfaction with her current service provider, and inviting bids from carefully selected parties. ‘The whole...

Japanese 'Daily Mail' accuses fleeing foreigners of callous theft of radiation 0
antharrison 3 years
Airline passenger disappointed he was not bumped and offered compensation 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Sat Nav Declared faulty after I drive by Luton 0
nilbymouse 3 years
Five Cardinal Supermarket Sins revealed - 2 50
Ironduke 3 years

1. Parking in a 'mother and toddler' space when your child is actually a BTEC student called Chantenay. And she's having a fag., 2. Yes, that is a tenth item on the counter. And you fucking know it,...

Police dogs hunt rogue vetenarian after drive by neutering 1
charlies_hat 3 years
Appeal by Katie Price Research UK 0
nilbymouse 3 years

It is the sad inevitability that by 2015, every single person in the UK will know someone who has divorced Katie Price. We need your help to fund research into this virulent strain of, nuptialitis....

Unemployment rises by 2,000. "We can do better than this," says Osborne. 0
deskpilot3 3 years
Police to avoid compensation payouts by removing police dogs' teeth... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

but they can still deliver a nasty suck....

Residents disappointed that town's new name will be Wootton Fergie Bassett... 0
deskpilot3 3 years
Desperate engineer discovers he can control nuclear meltdown with his iPad 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Labour MP Ed Moribund picks daffodils to try and get press coverage... 0
deskpilot3 3 years

me and Be Reasonable are trying to get a Radio 4 series out of this, so all votes will be greatly appreciated...

Law student's case destroyed in drive-by mooting. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Opera fan left spellbound by drive-by Magic Fluting. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Acrophobic Trapeeze instructor tells student "Don't make me come up there!" 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Gentleman's hankerchief in drive-by fluting. 0
Ian Searle 3 years

Or James Galway implicated in...

Cameron denies rift after Foreign Office relocated to tent in Libyan desert. 0
MightyBlair 3 years
Sewer men get windfall as chancellor pours taxpayers money down drain.. 0
OldThingy 3 years

Sewer worker said "It is fortuitous that my coleagues and I have ascended in affluence do to the unfortunate happenstance of our governers.", His coleage added "Sright mate, we aint goin a kick up...

Police admit Paedophile Ring can only be destroyed in the fires of Mount Doom 0
bonjonelson 3 years
MPs queue up to administer suppository to Cameron over painful NHS motion. 0
SingingHinny 3 years

More in 2-4 hours...

C3PO blames 'car keys' for three hour airport security delay 3
allmyownstunts 3 years
Tabloid claims ‘Massive online pedophile ring-busted by cops’: sacks proofreader 0
Qoxiivi 3 years