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Dangerous levels of dust found in North London stadium trophy room 4
topfotogmw 22.02.13 6:33am
Unfunny loudmouth on standby as BRITs host James Corden suffers tonsilitus 1
ginty 22.02.13 12:59am
Answerphone speaker broken on referees' whistle-blowers helpline 0
Perks 22.02.13 12:47am
Triple-Dip Recession Likely as Chancellor puts UK on Magic Beans Standard

Confidence in the UK economy hit an all-time low when it was revealed that the Chancellor, George Osborne, has placed the country on the magic beans standard saying: “It's true that I attended a...

Carter 21.02.13 11:48pm
'A jury of her peers' ends in a dozen fruitbats with bad judgement 6
Squudge 21.02.13 11:45pm
sponge finger
Prince Philip showing 'worrying signs of being back in good health'

Fears that the Duke of Edinburgh may have returned to rude health were strengthened yesterday when he told a nurse from the Philippines that her country must be 'half empty' because so many of her...

roybland 21.02.13 11:36pm
Satire site relaunches as Newlabour'sbiscuit

Fucking brilliant work Truebiscuit, another belter...

Truebiscuit 21.02.13 11:34pm
One Direction Comic Relief single voted stalkers' favourite

Think it goes something like, 'I'm gonna get you one way or another.'...

custard cream 21.02.13 6:14pm
Rootin Tootin
Briers was rhubarb claims pink cat

well I have been missing for some time!...

spoole2112 21.02.13 5:25pm
Shed for the yard turned into a Shard, complains despairing online shopper.

An unfortunate online shopping error has resulted in a Surrey man being delivered a 300-metre skyscraper instead of the garden shed he thought he had bought. "Instead of an 8ft by 12ft shed with a...

Boutros 21.02.13 5:10pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Man loses everything to not sound like an online loser

A man from Basingstoke has admitted spending hundreds of thousands of pounds on a team of writers to help him fill out the 'about you' sections across his social media profiles. John Dawkins decided...

Perks 21.02.13 5:04pm
Countryfile a den of shameful drug addicts

The glazed expression, irritable disposition and distant far-away look more commonly associated with Countryfile viewers is actually symptomatic of its reporter’s! The lid has been lifted a little...

theinvisiblecitychannels 21.02.13 4:44pm
Pistorius could easily jump bail, claim prosecutors

Sports fans say he will bounce back...

MikeF 21.02.13 4:25pm
GPS malfunction to blame for Giro d'Italia starting in Belfast 0
custard cream 21.02.13 3:42pm
custard cream
Cameron embarks on star studded apologies tour

David Cameron has embarked on a major apologies tour of former Commonwealth and British colonies whilst sealing new deals in the UK’s booming entertainment industry. Dubbed the Ain’t...

Dick Everyman 21.02.13 3:32pm
custard cream
Jedward forbid Ed Miliband from liking their music

First rate stuff Truebiscuit. Fuck me, that's a good one...

Truebiscuit 21.02.13 3:29pm
custard cream
Radiant Kate unfazed by odd creature

The Palace is delighted to report that the Duchess of Cambridge is completely untroubled by recent unflattering statements. "Consider the source" Kate is reported to have murmured "it is a bit like...

Squudge 21.02.13 2:54pm
custard cream
Hampshire woman survives nocturnal micturition incident again. Police baffled. 5
FlashArry 21.02.13 2:41pm
The All New Jeni B
Archaeologists discover historical incident not yet apologised for 0
sydalg 21.02.13 2:36pm
Woman who injected duck DNA into her breasts has a 'Quacking pair of tits' 4
antharrison 21.02.13 2:34pm
Ben Fogel's drink spiked with LSD but doesn't jump out window, wife devastated 1
jenlon 21.02.13 2:31pm
Pistorius defence seeks Pryce jurors 2
sydalg 21.02.13 2:10pm
Pryce jury latest : Pretoria transfer quashed 1
FlashArry 21.02.13 2:08pm
Prince Phillip only insults one Filipino during visit, Ambassador is outraged 0
jenlon 21.02.13 12:49pm
US face uncertain future and loss of purpose over “Who Will We Invade Next” 0
jenlon 21.02.13 12:47pm
PM's brain stolen on India trip

no-one notices

riesler 21.02.13 11:39am
South African plan for criminals to run their own trials "success"

It's been revealed that the trial of Oscar Pistorius is one of a pilot scheme where the entire case is run by criminals. Not only is the lead officer under suspicion of murder, the judge, jury and...

apepper 21.02.13 11:18am
Politicians demand pulse test for jurors in wake of Pryce trial 0
sydalg 21.02.13 10:43am
Vicky Pryce voted Britain's sexiest Greek-born economist 0
sydalg 21.02.13 10:40am
ISO to introduce 'Pryce-Jurist' as standard unit of idiocy 0
FlashArry 21.02.13 9:11am