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Bladerunner uses 'Replicant' defence 0
Smart Alex 22.02.13 10:16pm
Smart Alex
Roobarb animator declared inanimate at 91 0
roybland 22.02.13 9:25pm
Custard in hiding as Roobarb and Custard animator dies days after Briers 0
custard cream 22.02.13 7:03pm
custard cream
Unemployed man offers to stalk forgotten celebrities for money 15
sydalg 22.02.13 6:43pm
Man-eating fridge freezer sighted off St Ives coast.

Reports are coming in from Cornwall that a man-eating fridge freezer has been spotted basking in St Ives waters: "The massive beast came within yards of my boat as i was trawling round Zennor Head"...

rebel not taken 22.02.13 5:59pm
The All New Jeni B
Biscuit Crumbles: Owner Distracted

Not with grief, but by some beastleigh by-election. His site fills with spam and his server goes off-line. Sweepstake: will the owner come third, fourth or fifth in the election?...

Titus 22.02.13 4:41pm
Rose West accuses Vicky Pryce of plagiarism 0
sydalg 22.02.13 4:14pm
Adidas denies Pistorius sponsorship deal 0
sydalg 22.02.13 4:10pm
Oscar Pistorius 'sprung from jail'

(c) Dept of Obvious Humour 2013...

AReader 22.02.13 3:58pm
Oscar Pistorius granted Gareth Bale, on loan from Tottenham 0
waggers 22.02.13 3:34pm
Great British Bake-off Ends in Confusion

The most recent episode of the competition for menacing-looking chefs watched by people who never cook ended in confusion last night when there was such a long pause before the winner was announced...

Diogenes 22.02.13 2:29pm
Feather eater admits: "I get down in the dumps"

More to follow...

apepper 22.02.13 2:23pm
BBC to delay tribute to Richard Briers 'just in case' 0
custard cream 22.02.13 2:16pm
custard cream
Pistorius guard doubled amid fears he could be sprung 1
Smart Alex 22.02.13 2:07pm
Birds Eye Crispy Chicken found to contain bird's eye

I know, but someone had to say it...

Sinnick 22.02.13 1:55pm
ITV to launch new reality show: Diving on Ice 0
waggers 22.02.13 12:49pm
I'm not being hidden, say Maria Hutchings from behind a comedically large vase 0
johnnydobbo 22.02.13 12:49pm
Police kept body parts. "I can't believe they had the guts", says victim 0
topfotogmw 22.02.13 12:15pm
Penis size in the animal kingdom ‘does matter’ say scientists

Scientists have discovered that certain female proles from the south-east of England use the size of a male prole’s penis to decide whether it is worth going out on a date with him., Research...

Gerontius 22.02.13 11:32am
Pistorius: "What an amateur", sniffs investigating officer 0
sydalg 22.02.13 10:53am
EASTLEIGH EXORCISM: Cameron ensures wayward candidate toes party line

"The Power of Dave compels you" Anyone else picked up on Dave's paranoia when it was suggested that Ms Hutchings'...

pinxit 22.02.13 10:49am
Gay man offended by public indifference to his coming out 1
Dumbnews 22.02.13 10:47am
‘Suicide videos did not show Sparkhill at its best’ insist locals

Residents from a housing estate in Birmingham are said to be furious after a plan to blow up parts of the City centre were thwarted by counter-terrorist squads., People from the Sparkhill area are...

Uncle Bertie 22.02.13 10:30am
Dick Everyman
TV's Economics Miracle Hour bankrupting the rich and stupid

An investigation by the BBC has discovered that satellite TV channel EconUK has given dangerous advice to callers of the show who claim to be in economic turmoil, potentially putting them at risk of...

kga6 22.02.13 8:51am
Dangerous levels of dust found in North London stadium trophy room 4
topfotogmw 22.02.13 6:33am
Unfunny loudmouth on standby as BRITs host James Corden suffers tonsilitus 1
ginty 22.02.13 12:59am
Answerphone speaker broken on referees' whistle-blowers helpline 0
Perks 22.02.13 12:47am
Triple-Dip Recession Likely as Chancellor puts UK on Magic Beans Standard

Confidence in the UK economy hit an all-time low when it was revealed that the Chancellor, George Osborne, has placed the country on the magic beans standard saying: “It's true that I attended a...

Carter 21.02.13 11:48pm
'A jury of her peers' ends in a dozen fruitbats with bad judgement 6
Squudge 21.02.13 11:45pm
sponge finger
Prince Philip showing 'worrying signs of being back in good health'

Fears that the Duke of Edinburgh may have returned to rude health were strengthened yesterday when he told a nurse from the Philippines that her country must be 'half empty' because so many of her...

roybland 21.02.13 11:36pm