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Illegal immigrant cucumbers wearing hi viz jackets said to be bananas

Bad neat-o...

1
Not Amused 21.04.13 10:55am
godly1966
Raiders of medieval music museum only interested in the lute. 0
sredni vashta 21.04.13 10:47am
sredni vashta
Real blood on the cobbles to boost Coronation Street ratings

Social realism is being taken to new heights by Coronation Street bosses following the scheduled move to Manchester’s Salford Quays. For the first time in the Street’s history doors will be open...

4
Dick Everyman 21.04.13 9:13am
sponge finger
London marathon’s security assured as thousands of super-heroes set to run

London marathon organiser, Dave Bedford, says he is confident this year’s event will be trouble-free after making it mandatory for all runners to be dressed as super-heroes and crime fighters....

3
Yikes 21.04.13 9:03am
godly1966
Frumpy funnygirl Miranda immortalised by wind-breaking Cockneys 0
Nimrod 21.04.13 8:51am
Nimrod
Nurses 'sexier' doing paperwork than emptying bedpans

NHS hospital patients think nurses are sexier doing paperwork rather than providing direct patient care according to a Royal College of Nursing poll. The poll of thousands of patients found that...

0
roybland 21.04.13 8:27am
roybland
Pickles forced to wear Hi-Viz jacket on extensions climb-down 1
Squudge 21.04.13 7:51am
sponge finger
Apple take on gun companies with new Iphone ‘Murder App’

Tech giant Apple have given a new meaning to the phrase “killer app” by announcing the release of the new ‘Murder App’ for the Iphone4. Unnatural death infliction has been an area hitherto...

1
Corrigan 21.04.13 6:46am
Titus
Tied up kangaroo found up Arris

I'm off for a Scotch and Koala...

0
Tess Goes 21.04.13 2:55am
Tess Goes
Operation Rhododendron Bush - All BBC TV Personalities Arrested

The Metropolitan Police have confirmed that they have arrested every television personality who appeared on the BBC television network in the 1970s. Following the arrests of Jim Davidson, Freddie...

0
joefall 20.04.13 11:33pm
joefall
Can you tell who it is yet? 6
Squudge 20.04.13 11:26pm
Al OPecia
USA in shock as Boston bomber gets hospital treatment without medical insurance. 0
Maverick 20.04.13 10:17pm
Maverick
"My Boy Never Threatened Anyone" Claims Kim Jong-Un's Tearful Mum.

"He was set up. He is a good boy - he would never do anythng like that."...

2
Titus 20.04.13 10:12pm
Squudge
Increase in number of dancing lumberjacks is logarithmic. 5
Maverick 20.04.13 10:04pm
godly1966
Boston "returns to normal" - man dies in drive-by shooting. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 20.04.13 10:02pm
Al OPecia
God rounds up all Welsh people in major product recall 1
sydalg 20.04.13 8:53pm
blacklesbianandproudofit
"I never liked the look of that Rolf Harris", says Kim Jong-un 1
sydalg 20.04.13 8:51pm
Titus
Buddist mathematicians use logarithms to the power of Zen.

Thanks Maverick!...

0
Al OPecia 20.04.13 8:33pm
Al OPecia
NRA try to shift blame "Guns don't kill people, pressure cookers kill people" 0
Scronnyglonkle 20.04.13 5:56pm
Scronnyglonkle
22-stone man refuses to risk London Marathon if G4S given security contract 0
sydalg 20.04.13 5:47pm
sydalg
Iceland Opens First Store in Reykjavik 0
Iggy Pop-Barker 20.04.13 4:56pm
Iggy Pop-Barker
Navy Seals killed by colourblind Canadians. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 20.04.13 4:28pm
dominic_mcg
Cheers from Boston bombing suspects as they realise everyone knows their names 3
topfotogmw 20.04.13 2:40pm
rob box
Gordon the Gopher admits that in his younger days he was into 'fisting'

Unlike his co-host Phillip Schofield he didn't take drugs during his time as a children’s television presenter, and booze just went 'straight through him'., , He revealed: “It wasn’t a...

1
Ian Searle 20.04.13 1:23pm
AReader
New car breakdown service for gays launched - Green Fag - 2 43
John Wiltshire 20.04.13 12:58pm
beau-jolly
Topology professor accused of "twisting the truth into a pretzel" 0
AReader 20.04.13 12:36pm
AReader
National Rifle Association To Promote Bombs

America’s National Rifle Association has added bombs to its list of weapons which every American should have the Constitutional right to own. “Until now there really hasn’t been anywhere for...

0
deceangli 20.04.13 11:42am
deceangli
NRA calls for a ban on boats in backyards. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 20.04.13 10:38am
Al OPecia
Maths fetish recognised as a standard deviation 4
cinquecento 20.04.13 8:56am
ginty
Police arrest actor after dramatic manhunt 0
Scronnyglonkle 20.04.13 8:49am
Scronnyglonkle