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Helen of Troy had ‘big, jeroboam-shaped head’, claim archaeologists 5
Qoxiivi 3 years

Archaeologists believe they have uncovered the truth behind Helen of Troy’s face and its fabled ship-launching ability. ‘The whole legend’s just a big misunderstanding. She wasn’t attractive...

Letwin: "Hardly my fault if none of the shredders in the park were working." 0
Boutros 3 years
Shirts up, trousers down. FTSE to blame 0
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
UK Analogue TV to be turned off in 2012; Isle of Wight's turned on in 2015 4
apepper 3 years

The UK analogue TV signal is to be turned off in October 2012 with Northern Ireland to be last area to switch to digital. The Isle of Wight is expected to start receiving television signals by...

IoW metric changeover, moves afoot 3
vertical 3 years

technology so fast these days...

Bell End! Hip-Hop excerpts to be sounded 'quarter-hourly' instead 0
kga6 3 years

Inhabitants of East London are to drown out church chimes this week, as they start projecting snippets of hip-hop tracks every quarter of an hour, with an extended section on the hour, to keep the...

Minister Behind Planning Reforms Finds His Garden is Gone 2
GreyWolf 3 years

Local Government and Planning Minister Bob Neill woke today to find six new houses going up in his back garden. He also found six sweaty builders making tea in his kitchen and raiding the fridge....

Slim-Fast model finally figures it out how it works 3
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

‘It’s because I was having a fucking milkshake instead of breakfast and lunch isn’t it?’ exclaims Jenny Green, a model who appeared in a late 90s advertising campaign for the Slim-Fast range,...

Librarian blames job loss on whispering campaign 0
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
Labour confident Ed Miliband has no friends to fuck him up the arse 0
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
Ministers resign on Friday evening to avoid wrath of satire websites 0
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
Fox bowed to inevitable rearguard action 0
witless 3 years

resigned for interaction with Mr Werritty...

Jockeys' fury reaches new heights 0
apepper 3 years

"We're fed up with being sold short.", said a spokesman...

Jockeys to strike after BHA replaces whips with carrots on fishing rods. 2
dominic_mcg 3 years

Jockeys are to strike on Monday in protest at the British Horseracing Association's new rule which will replace the traditional whip with a carrot on the end of a fishing rod. Jockeys have claimed...

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dvo4fun 3 years
Jockeys organise whip round for Richard Hughes 0
Scroat 3 years
GP describes 'No-Balls Butt' as 'freak occurrence' 0
kga6 3 years
Horses attribute overuse of the whip to small man syndrome 9
charlies_hat 3 years
Poison Homme, a new fragrance for the man in your life 'because he's worthless' 0
vertical 3 years

courtesy of Christian 'toxic' Dior...

Wow, this 3D remake of 'Towering Inferno' is amazing, you can almost smell... 0
3 years

Oh shit, this is a 40" Sony!! Arrgh!...

Council to Fill Potholes with Children in Care 0
Aberdeen Correspondent 3 years

Aberdeen City Council announced today that it will save an estimated £12.5million each year by squeezing children who are in the care of Social Services into the City's numerous potholes...

Public Schools to retain Charitable Status: champagne all round 0
Drylaw 3 years

The Independent Schools won a vital legal battle today over The Charity Commission, who had been too narrow in some of the ways it made schools show benefit to society, according to a tribunal ruling...

Daily Mirror Awarded Contract for Weekly Bin Collections 0
Aberdeen Correspondent 3 years

The Daily Mirror have been awarded a lucrative contract to handle weekly refuse collections in and around the Borough of Westminster, despite complaints from residents near St James's Park, where the...

Letwin not thought to be contender for Defence Ministry job 0
Drylaw 3 years
Letwin's resignation letter 'may have been posted in wrong box' 0
Long Distance Clara 3 years
Liam Fox disposes of career in park bin near MoD 0
Long Distance Clara 3 years
Liam Fox steps down from cabnit, and jumps straight into the closet 0
Perks 3 years
Adam Werrity denies taking Liam Fox to see 'Friends With Benefits'... 0
deskpilot3 3 years
Investigation finds Oliver Letwin's cabinets full of banana peel and coke cans. 0
deskpilot3 3 years
Inflated man claims he was let down by NHS 3
beau-jolly 3 years