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Vince Cable eaten by escaped snow leopards 4
Basil_B 3 years

'Where the fuck did they come fro.' Last words of Vince Cable. Press humourists have named both leopards Rupert and Murdoch...

Report: Black Santas more likely to be stopped and searched than white Santas 0
Long Distance Clara 3 years

Figures published today by the Ministry of Justice have revealed that the police continue to discriminate against ethnic minority Father Christmases, with Santas of colour almost 12 times more likely...

Cumbria regrets the vegetarian option 0
MrChigleysAunt 3 years
Royal weddings “to boost tourist trade” in 2011... 0
Doylem 3 years

Bob Appleyard, a travel industry expert, sees cheer amid the gloom. “Air travel has taken quite a hit this year, starting with volcanic ash and finishing off with ice and snow. The travel industry...

Small earthquake in Cumbria, not many dead... 0
Doylem 3 years
Stop press: politician over-estimates his own importance... 0
Doylem 3 years
Strictly dancing announces spin off show ,doddering old fools and horses. 0
Malcum eggs 3 years
Cable buried under floorboards, as Lib-Dems rebuild... 0
Doylem 3 years
Sustainable energy: Cable’s embarrassment “enough to heat a family home”... 0
Doylem 3 years
Vince Cable causes Cumbrian Earthquake 1
bonjonelson 3 years

[more soon]...

Cameron and Clegg create 'Test Tube PM' in ball-breaking Bio-Merge. 0
Trickster 3 years

David Cameron and Nick Clegg will today make a secret visit to a 'fertitlity unit' where the very first 'Test Tube Prime Minister' will be cloned and grown., "It's very exciting," said both Clegg...

Cries of Conspiracy as Cables and Cables confuses British Public. 0
Trickster 3 years

Newsdesks are jammed today as the great (confused) British Public attempt to 'work out' the difference between Vince Cables and the US Cables. "We want to protect our special relationship," said PM...

Richardson says KimIl Sung to get Cable in return for non aggression package 0
Malcum eggs 3 years
Crossbow rapist admits he got too excited when he put it in cider 0
Malcum eggs 3 years

take a bow...

Halliburton settles Nigeria bribe claims ,Funerals will be carried out on Friday 1
Malcum eggs 3 years
Richard Dawkins; “You’ve got to believe in something, and for me it’s Echinacea" 1
BillyBitzer 3 years

As the cold and flu season reaches a peak this winter, many people will find their first sneeze greeted with advice from well-meaning friends to “Take some Echinacea”. What makes this herbal...

Britain expels Russian spy for 'overstepping the mark' 0
Dun Dunkin 3 years

and for having stripy red socks. 'We could tell straight away he wasn't a gentleman'...

The Government have apologised 0
Bismarck 3 years

for the lack of an advertising campaign this Autumn warning of the inevitability of Winter.'We have learned a valuable lesson' said a government spokesman 'and we won't be caught out again, in fact...

BAA launches board game for stranded passengers-- 0
Bismarck 3 years

Pin the trail on the Jumbo...

Cambridge choristers stranded in New York district present 'Carols from Queens' 0
antharrison 3 years
Cameron & Pickles To Form Singing Duo....'Trashley.' 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

First gig, Newcastle. 'Take it away, boys!' Second gig, Sussex. 'Wow, southern comfort.'...

Anti-Baldness Drug May Cause Sexual Problems - Hahahahahahahahaha 11
De-scribe 3 years

Concerns that anti-baldness drug Propecia may cause sexual problems such as impotence have been described as “fucking hilarious” by scientists. “Who says science doesn’t do irony” said...

The Govt announces to be anti News Corp is a 'gaffe' 0
Dun Dunkin 3 years

"The decision will now be made by a pro Murdoch minister. That restores 'the balance'"...

Benitez sacked by Inter Milan 0
callaway 3 years

Offered new roll on Go Compare...

Words/pictures exchange rate collapses on rumour of new OED edition. 0
the coarse whisperer 3 years
Heathrow to turn into lagest traveller site in the UK 0
4ty2 3 years

as thousands of travelers moved in over night. However BAA might be sued for operating a traveller site with illegal encampment as they failed to obtain the correct planning permission...

BAA asks MOD to deploy Harriers at Heathrow 2
4ty2 3 years

not to lift off passengers of to flatten the place but to help shift the snow of the runway by using them as rapid reaction force snow blowers...

Cameron on his way to become a qualified electrician 0
4ty2 3 years

by demonstrating skills in cable stripping. Next he will wire up Murdoch with sky...

Scammers hail ‘bumper year’ for fake compensation claims 2
dogwheels 3 years

Con artists up and down the country have hailed 2010 as a ‘bumper year’ for cashing-in on fake compensation claims. With the UK experiencing two extended periods of bitterly cold and icy...

Next Year's X-Factor Winner's Biography On Sale From Today 8
IABP 3 years

The winner of next year's X-Factor has released their biography today - Next Year's Winner: My Story - in order to give the public an insight as to who they really are. Little is known about next...