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New Cartesian device from Apple - the iThink

Hat tip to Titus...

1
Smart Alex 18.09.13 2:08pm
Titus
A&E's bear brunt of XFactor rejections

With the tenth series of XFactor now underway, a shocking new report has revealed the true extent of the impact that the show has had on the NHS. The damning report, issued by the National Institute...

0
Robopop 18.09.13 2:07pm
Robopop
UN promises to act against Sainsburys after Hedge End gas attack. 0
MADJEZ 18.09.13 12:59pm
MADJEZ
Army see no advantage to using drunk tanks

More hic soon., http://www.thesharkguys.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/russiantankdrunk.jpg...

0
MADJEZ 18.09.13 12:33pm
MADJEZ
Met Office advice: winter draws on 0
custard cream 18.09.13 11:43am
custard cream
Salmond wants to keep Strerling, not arsed about Gretna

SNP leader Alex Salmond ignited the Scottish devolution debate by sensationally offering up the town of Gretna in order to gain a yes vote. Speaking at his party’s conference on the Isle of Grand...

1
Scronnyglonkle 18.09.13 11:42am
AReader
Scotland could have Rio Games team

Directly lifted from the BBC. Trying to add anything just spoils the brilliant simplicity of the line...

2
raudus 18.09.13 11:42am
Loundshay
Social workers, teachers, doctors: 'Another dead child, blah blah blah,whatever'

Social workers, teachers and doctors all put on sad faces after the report into Daniel Pelka's murder, before demanding more money for their continuing incompetence and neglect. A spokeswoman said...

2
John Wiltshire 18.09.13 11:35am
AReader
Those Life-Changing Lib Dem Policies in Full

Never scared to tackle the fundamental, pivotal issues like the 5p charge on carrier bags and free bus travel for schoolchildren, Nick Clegg is using this year’s conference to go deep down into the...

2
greenhighlander 18.09.13 11:34am
AReader
Starbucks asks customers not to bring kids into outlets

Starbucks says it has been "thrust" into the debate about kids being dragged by their parents everywhere. Starbucks has not imposed a ban, but says kids "should not be part of the Starbucks...

0
rogerg 18.09.13 11:31am
rogerg
Nurses urge openness on MP numbers

Nurses in England have called for the number of MPs actually attending the House to be made available on an "as it happens" basis. "We believe this would be the first stage in a type of quota...

1
Coco 18.09.13 11:21am
NewBiscuit
Be careful not to plant your antirrhinum too early 0
NewBiscuit 18.09.13 10:23am
NewBiscuit
2016 World Snooker Champion to be named next week 0
johnnydobbo 18.09.13 10:02am
johnnydobbo
Austrian man arrested for behaving normally

Police this morning arrested 47 year old Franz Golben at his home in the town of Wilten in the west of Austria. The officer in charge of the dawn raid said: 'We received reports from Herr Golben's...

1
John Wiltshire 18.09.13 9:52am
antharrison
Ginger people do have souls, God's explains, but only so they may be damned...

In a striking turn of events, the famously self-employed inventor and property mogul, God, has for the first time broken his silence about the meaning of his work. He explained that, contrary to the...

0
TobiasBV 18.09.13 9:44am
TobiasBV
Shock report - Syrian rebels are not always very nice fellows

A shock report today shows that rebels fighting the Syrian government don't always behave like sporting gentlemen and jolly good chaps. A spokesman for the general public said: 'This is all very...

0
John Wiltshire 18.09.13 9:32am
John Wiltshire
Prince William and Prince Harry put down by MOD

The Ministry of Defence has defended a decision to put down two royal princes following Prince William's final shift as a search and rescue pilot at RAF Valley, in Anglesey, last week. The decision...

0
ChesterField 18.09.13 9:25am
ChesterField
Clegg: 'Coalitions are great for Britain, as long as we're in them'

Lib Dem leader Nick Clegg said today that coalition government is better for Britain than single-party rule. 'I think we've conclusively demonstrated the value of a coalition,' he said. 'Looking at...

0
John Wiltshire 18.09.13 9:22am
John Wiltshire
Salmond claims 'Independent Scotland could win Eurovision Song Contest'

With exactly one year to go to the referendum on Scottish independence, Alex Salmond has spoken of his dream for the country to triumph in the prestigious Eurovision song competition. 'Scotland has...

0
antharrison 18.09.13 9:11am
antharrison
Shane MacGowan enlisted as ‘Drunk Tank Czar’... 0
Tripod 18.09.13 8:54am
Tripod
Grand Theft Auto V rapped for ‘poor provision of disabled parking spaces’... 1
Tripod 18.09.13 8:37am
NewBiscuit
Antisemitic poacher admits to hunting rabbis

"Shhh. Be vewy vewy quiet, I'm huntin' wabbi"...

0
NewBiscuit 18.09.13 8:32am
NewBiscuit
Lib-Dems to re-launch as Boy Band

The Lib-Dems will sensationally reposition its self today in Glasgow by re-launching itself as a Boy Band. The Band will be known as “All Directions” in line with current party thinking and will...

13
Scronnyglonkle 18.09.13 8:01am
Oxbridge
Crooked players 'help to take the uncertainties out of snooker'...

Brian Cathcart, head of World Snooker, put a positive spin on the news that some players are conspiring with bent bookmakers by deliberately throwing matches. “Snooker has traditionally been a...

0
Tripod 18.09.13 7:56am
Tripod
Clegg pledges to abolish nutrition fees 8
Lens Cap 18.09.13 6:22am
Not Amused
Sad Xmas party incident forces office politician to give 'speech of his life'

Office politician Phil Butcher must deliver 'the speech of his life' at the IT department's annual conference in Brighton, after a series of scandals have threatened to destroy his career in...

0
ronseal 18.09.13 5:58am
ronseal
Fruit of the Loom to release new film

Fruit of the Loom to release new film based loosely on American waists entitled, "The Expandables."...

1
Captaintrod 17.09.13 11:21pm
Middle-aged man still thinks about argument he lost eight years ago...

Julian Wordsworth, a middle aged man currently residing in Surrey, has recently admitted to friends that he has become 'consumed' by the process of going over arguments he had a long time ago in his...

1
TobiasBV 17.09.13 11:18pm
Cruise ship engineers rushed in to salvage 'beached Eric Pickles'

The pioneering engineers responsible for successfully salvaging the stricken Costa Concordia cruise ship are facing their 'most gruelling challenge yet' today, after Conservative politician Eric...

2
Jesus H 17.09.13 11:16pm
Firefighters reminded to close cover before striking. 0
Boutros 17.09.13 11:11pm
Boutros