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"I'm out!" says gay Dragon. 1
Ian Searle 03.10.12 3:48pm
MADJEZ
Kevin Pietersen released back into the wild

The ECB has today revealed that troublesome ex-South African cricketer Kevin Pietersen has been returned to the wild and has rejoined his pack. He is expected to make a full recovery and will...

4
grottymonty 03.10.12 3:08pm
dvo4fun
Embarrasing rail franchise U-turn as Virgin's brown paper bag ends up biggest

more bungs soon...

0
grottymonty 03.10.12 2:41pm
grottymonty
“Self-harm a possibility”, as Abu Hamza takes unaccompanied toilet break... 1
Tripod 03.10.12 2:18pm
FlashArry
Transport Minister calls in Jeremy Forrest to give his staff extra maths lessons 1
pinxit 03.10.12 2:07pm
FlashArry
Manchester United reveal details of monumental Ferguson statue

Plans for a colossal statue of long-time manager Sir Alex Ferguson - at 316ft height, over 10 ft taller than New York's Statue of Liberty - were unveiled at Manchester United's Old Trafford ground...

11
pinxit 03.10.12 2:04pm
pinxit
Black slabs appear on desks throughout the world: 2001 was true

Fans of Arthur C Clarkes seminal sci-fi novel 2001 a Space Odyssey have today announced that the appearance of black slabs, or greyish towers on desks throughout the world are proof that Clarke's...

0
simonjmr 03.10.12 1:50pm
simonjmr
Strike on Euro-Star means Britain no longer a cul-de-sac....again! 0
philthefunk 03.10.12 1:48pm
philthefunk
The Guardian: we were only joking about that left-wing stuff.

Alan Rusbridger, editor of The Guardian newspaper, today revealed that the paper’s left of centre political stance has always been ‘a bit of a joke that got out of hand.’ He said this morning,...

0
sigmund 03.10.12 1:38pm
sigmund
Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in training for big "end of year" event 0
arnied 03.10.12 1:22pm
arnied
Person thrown out of

All You Can Eat restaurant in Brighton for eating too much, has revealed that he is on the Cambridge diet., He'll eat Oxford next week...

0
philthefunk 03.10.12 1:01pm
philthefunk
Radio 1's.....

decision to air Gary Glitter's cover of 'Jimmy Jimmy' has been described as 'insensitive' by Jeremy Forrest., He would rather hear the b'side 'Runaway'...

0
philthefunk 03.10.12 12:52pm
philthefunk
Wife drops electric heater in bath, husband 'incandescent' 1
pdavies65 03.10.12 12:45pm
Smart Alex
Catholic Church deny Jimmy Savile was a priest 0
philthefunk 03.10.12 12:33pm
philthefunk
U-Turn Tax fury....

George Osbourne has infuriated ministers by introducing a U-Turn Tax., "That means that when we introduce a new policy without thinking it through, we'll have to stand by it," an angry Front Bencher...

0
philthefunk 03.10.12 12:26pm
philthefunk
Newquay Rocket powered by pasties...

will be liable to the pasty tax as they will be heated to over 500* C, they will then be available on Network Rail...

0
philthefunk 03.10.12 12:18pm
philthefunk
Milliband pleased with new misheard nickname - "Total Fun Cup" 0
simonjmr 03.10.12 11:31am
simonjmr
Miliband aides race to concoct macho public persona

The Miliband bandwagon's been galvanised since polls revealed the extent of public amazement that Ed thinks of himself as next PM. Advisors are convinced that injections of butchness are the answer...

0
vertical 03.10.12 11:01am
vertical
Ed Miliband denies 'forgotten 50%' was reference to his brother. 0
Long Distance Clara 03.10.12 10:58am
Long Distance Clara
JJB owner bemoans lack of interest in sports as stores close. 0
sdritchie 03.10.12 10:46am
sdritchie
Milliband forgot to mention Five Loaves & Two Fishes 0
Rowly 03.10.12 10:16am
Rowly
But seriously thow,

all joking aside,Sir Jimmy was a fine man,Im sure all the roumers are down right lies,I for one shall remember him as a wonderfull generous kind man of many tracksuits,a man who gave up his time to...

0
Dave Grigger 03.10.12 9:56am
Dave Grigger
Liverpool man only one conviction for dangerous driving away...

from being allowed a Range Rover...

0
sdritchie 03.10.12 9:53am
sdritchie
Asked if he had any comments

to make about dead kiddie fiddler friend Gary Glitter had only this to say,we had our falling outs like most peados,but one thing that realy hurts is why didnt he fix my PC for me instead of me...

1
Dave Grigger 03.10.12 9:42am
The Nage
Jim"ll

fist it for you and you and you...

0
Dave Grigger 03.10.12 9:16am
Dave Grigger
Satellite hi-jacking a real threat

Cyber experts warn that with 994 satellites orbiting the Earth, any committed hacker could send us technologically back to the 1960's!, It could happen at anyti...

0
philthefunk 03.10.12 9:15am
philthefunk
Justin Lee Collins says....

pushing girlfriend in front of Carr was 'futile and pointless'...

0
philthefunk 03.10.12 8:55am
philthefunk
Savile not whiter than white after all

Shamelessly nicked from here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-19801768...

0
Idiot 03.10.12 8:55am
Idiot
Justin Lee Collins says slap was necessary to calm his then girlfriend down...

She needed calming down as I'd just dropped an anvil on her head and set her clothes on fire, some girls have no sense of humour!...

0
philthefunk 03.10.12 8:53am
philthefunk
BBC help with Saville inquiry

A dyslexic BBC spokesperson has agreed to open his flies to help with any official inquiry into Jimmy Saville...

1
philthefunk 03.10.12 8:30am
Skoob1999