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Batman seconded to Met as rioting continues 0
simjel 3 years

The Metropolitan police have announced that the crime fighting Caped Crusader, known more commonly as "The Batman" has been seconded to them on loan from Gotham City, in an attempt to restore order...

Police grant sex toy amnesty in preparation for use of plastic bullets. 3
Milo Shame 3 years
Shanklin disturbances blamed on 4 fiftysomethings stealing pick'n'mix 0
simonjmr 3 years
Genuine London shoplifters livlihoods under threat from unlicensed looters 0
simonjmr 3 years
London fire crews to be further hampered by hosepipe ban 4
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years
Apple to compete with Blackberry through release of iRiot App 2
Screenie 3 years
Riot footage causes Nick Griffin's micropenis to become erect 0
Christopher Frost 3 years
Panic on the streets of London, Panic on the streets of Birmingham... 5
charlies_hat 3 years

Chris Moyles and DLT in hiding...

London MP's ask advice from countryside colleagues on how to build a moat. 0
Milo Shame 3 years
Pepys blogs while London burns 0
Christopher Frost 3 years
Burberry to give away a free brick with every hoodie 0
Screenie 3 years
Mayor takes broom out of own arse just in time to help with clean-up. 0
Milo Shame 3 years
'Can't-be-arsed' anarchist, 60, loots his own fridge 0
Crow 3 years

No more later...

COBRA committee authorises Police to use live cobras for crowd control. 0
bonjonelson 3 years

Here's hoping...

Riot Police to be issued with polar bears 10
Ludicity 3 years

Rioters in London’s inner cities have been warned that if they engage in any more trouble the police will release a polar bear. ‘We have been more than patient with these people,’ said Home...

Cameron welcomes return of "the Biltz Spirit". more soon. 0
Al OPecia 3 years
Londoners braced for return of UB40. 0
wallster 3 years
"We're all in this together," says Cameron from bath full of turds. 0
Drylaw 3 years
Looters caught by TV Licensing van. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Metropolitan police officers to crank up their faces 2
Screenie 3 years

In light of the continued violence and rioting across London the Metropolitan police have taken the unprecedented step of increasing their police officer's powers to look on from unimpressed to...

London Riots... 6
Screenie 3 years
Lack of £1 coins for trolleys thwarts Tesco looters 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
City unrest spreads to Norwich as youths drop litter and cycle on the pavement 1
charlies_hat 3 years
Sky TV buys rights to "Child criminals do the stupidest things" 0
Erlang 3 years

Another budget show curtesy of CCTV...

Copycat indignation engulfs Tunbridge Wells 3
greg various 3 years
Riots over. It was all a bet! 0
Awkward Facts 3 years

It has been admitted that the real reason for the outbreak of rioting in London was a £1 bet between two 15-year old gang leaders in the city as to whether they could get the PM and MPs back from...

Olympic Committee to review CCTV looting footage for future ‘fencing’ stars 1
Qoxiivi 3 years
Police use CCTV footage to identify looters too stupid to cover their face 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years
Updated AA Riotplanner available via any good social networking site 0
Iamthestig 3 years
England clear winner of the prize for World's youngest criminals. 0
Awkward Facts 3 years

A generation of effort by planners in the education, justice and child-care systems has been rewarded with the greatest density of under-age villains in cities since Columbia's street urchins were...