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Michelle Bachmann Confesses! God Upset With Her; Tells Her She Lost Her Mind 0
LouCipher 3 years

In the wake of having reported that God told her to run for President, Michelle Bachmann appeared on Fox News visibly shaken, and announced, “God has told me something else, and it’s something I...

French scientists claim nuclear accident is actually unclear accident 0
Pagantroll 3 years

French nuclear industry claims the international media have a history of misrepresenting the facts...

Thames Water announce that 500 tonnes of Celebrities dumped in Thames this week 0
grottymonty 3 years

More effluent later...

UK's first Joke Amnesty announced. 0
seymour totti 3 years

The Government has announced the UK's first joke amnesty. Hundreds of embarrassing, cringeworthy and potentially fatal jokes are still in circulation. It is hoped that they will be handed in for safe...

New study links excessive blogging to obesity 0
Dumbnews 3 years
9/11 Remembrance events peak with George Bush looking utterly clueless 0
steve_l 3 years

In a finale to the tenth-anniversary remembrance events, former President George Bush appeared in front of a group of schoolchildren to listen to kids stories, while an aide whispered in his ear and...

Paranoid Statisticians Fear 81% Reoccurring 8
thisisall1word 3 years

that any funnier?...

Feng Shui expert to reorganise banks 1
spoole2112 3 years
For every £1 you spend with us, we'll put 30p into an offhsore tax haven says T 2
ronseal 3 years

One of Britain's favourite high street and out of town retailers has pledged to donate 30 pence of every pound spent in its stores to oversees aid. It could generate billions of pounds in much needed...

I'm no racist but we're being swamped by Angles says head ofSaxon Defence League 0
ronseal 3 years
Spokesman for UK banks is a chap in Bangalore called Terry 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Banks refuse to talk to Sir John Vickers until he gives them his account number 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Travellers defend imprisonment of 24 slaves 0
borednow 3 years

as alternative source of income in the event of the value of scrap metal falling, a spokesman from the site Mick O'Mick said "we first got them in around 15 years ago when scrap value was at an all...

Sport relief cynics say David Walliams is simply going through the motions 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Archbishop of Canterbury to retire to concentrate on 2012 Strictly 0
simonjmr 3 years
UK Government To Close Stable Door By 2019 0
Awkward Facts 3 years

The Government has accepted plans by an Independent Commission to procure a bolt for the National Stable, fit it to the stable door, and then shut and lock the door by the year 2019. However, plans...

Daily Mail launches Fantasy Dictator Assassination League 0
simonjmr 3 years

The Daily Mail is launching Fantasy Dictator Assassination League, where livid readers get to spend £100m on buying 10 International dictators, crackpots and war criminals that they think will be...

Director of Josef Fritzl movie accused of nepotism 0
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
Rick Perry: "Without Capital Punishment There Would Be No Christianity" 3
Supremecourtjester 3 years

Defending his execution of 234 people as governor of Texas, Rick Perry said his fundamentalist religion would be nowhere without it. "If Pontius Pilate sentenced Jesus to 300 hours of community...

‘Gideon’s Way’, the new solution for the UKs stumbling economy 1
spoole2112 3 years

“Cuts will help recovery” was the mantra from George (Gideon) Osborne as he delivered a keynote speech today. The chancellor believes that the economy will thrive simply by removing all support...

Strategic world domination board game players forced to fill out Risk Assessment 4
Ian Searle 3 years

Manufacturers Parker Brothers claim it's the Nanny State gone mad! However the Health and Safety Executive have pointed out it does contain small parts which could cause choking, repeated shaking of...

Eric Pickles to display nutritional value 8
antharrison 3 years

Following the decision by McDonalds to label food clearly with levels of fat, salt and protein, fatboy cabinet minister Eric "Jar of and don't skimp on the cheese" Pickles is to be given a tattoo...

Sniffer dogs to be taught some manners 1
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
Dyslexic Bush counts the days till 11/9 2
Dumbnews 3 years
Homeopathic leak threatens catastrophe 16
bonjonelson 3 years

An accidental release of highly dilute homeopathic waste from a research institute in Swindon has lead to calls for the centre to be shut down. Plant operators have admitted responsibility for...

North Korea to join EU next year 2
Rick Bradford 3 years

The Democratic People's Republic of Korea (DPRK) will officially join the European Union on January 1 next year, according to a statement from the EU's Directorate of Expansion Rapporteurs. In the...

Car wash proprietor opens supermarket 4
antharrison 3 years

Although he always answered "If I wanted a f*cking car wash I'd go to a f*cking car wash" to the attendants hawking £5 mini-valets in his local Tesco car park, car wash owner John Askham wondered if...

Reading Out The Names Of Those Killed In Accidents 0
Awkward Facts 3 years

In a monthly ceremony organized by the United States Government to begin in October this year, on the 11th day of each month the United States Secretary of Transportation will stand outside 1200 New...

Statisticians Remember 81% 0
thisisall1word 3 years

succinct is the new funny., Although, this is sort of now after the even tell this one in a few months time and get an "ey?"...

Godot arrives 3
Oxbridge 3 years