Topic — Add New » Comments Votes Author Last Comment
Biblical scholars officially declare Somerset the new 'Sodden and Gommorrah' 1
irreverendJ 14.02.14 7:56am
Titus
Man who had sex with peanut charged with unlawful kernel knowledge 0
sydalg 14.02.14 7:04am
sydalg
Scottish entrepreneur with a cold gets inebriated on February 14th...

Yes it's Duncan Bannatyne...

0
Son of Barnabas 14.02.14 7:02am
Son of Barnabas
'Money no object' as Cameron gets Wonga loan to sort floods.

More debt crisis soon...

0
MADJEZ 14.02.14 2:06am
MADJEZ
Suspicious packages at military sites found to be sandbags. 1
Ian Searle 13.02.14 11:18pm
MADJEZ
Maddie police will return from Portugal with suspect when UK weather improves.

More sunshine surveillance soon...

0
MADJEZ 13.02.14 11:16pm
MADJEZ
'Dave Lee Travesty' declares prosecutor 5
Skylarking 13.02.14 11:13pm
Ref Minor
DLT judge was Noel Edmonds in disguise. GOTCHA ! 0
MADJEZ 13.02.14 10:54pm
MADJEZ
Absence of fossilised sandbags suggests Tories ruled Atlantis 0
Underconstruction 13.02.14 10:44pm
Underconstruction
Man Who Hated Life Dies Aged 102

Retired machine-part worker Arnold Snelling of Gravesend in Kent, who died yesterday at grand old age of 102, hated life with a passion, according to members of his estranged family. [quote]"He...

2
Teenwolf 13.02.14 10:42pm
Underconstruction
Government To Create Department For The Reduction Of Bureaucracy

To be followed by the establishment of a new Quango Abolition Council. More later, in triplicate...

0
Titus 13.02.14 10:32pm
Titus
Woman still claims she found a hairy cornflake on her shredded wheat. 1
MADJEZ 13.02.14 10:27pm
Underconstruction
'Dreams' to launch new water-bed with sandbag frame 0
Underconstruction 13.02.14 10:26pm
Underconstruction
Environment Agency orders six 3D printers to avert sandbag shortage

"Too little too late" was the response from Wraysbury residents after hearing that… MTF...

0
Underconstruction 13.02.14 10:08pm
Underconstruction
Stripy jumper wearing flood looters to be used as depth gauges

The Government has announced harsh measures for anyone caught looting flooded properties whilst wearing the traditional burglars uniform of a black and white stripy jumper, eye mask, and flat cap....

10
Bigglesworth 13.02.14 10:04pm
Titus
70's office worker to sue women who didn't find him 'cuddly'

"I remember it, like was yesterday" said a tearful Anthony Sithers, choking back the tears. "I'd gone into accounts to be friendly with some of the girls, as they tapped away at their adding machines...

0
Underconstruction 13.02.14 9:50pm
Underconstruction
Next on the turntable, folks - Believe It If You Like - by The Band 0
Drylaw 13.02.14 9:29pm
Drylaw
Paddington stationary

Nothing soon. I'm sitting in a railway station, Got a ticket for my destination, But f'ing fgw aren't going there...

3
Not Amused 13.02.14 9:21pm
FlashArry
BBC4 to screen new Scandinavian crime drama 'The Giraffe' 0
Mandy Lifeboat 13.02.14 9:14pm
Mandy Lifeboat
Oedipus's relationship back on track after mother tells him he's adopted 2
sydalg 13.02.14 9:14pm
Electrelane
Cameron shows solidarity with flooded householders

In a very human moment, the Tory leader David Cameron showed a great solidarity and understanding with those whose houses had been flooded. The Prime Minister went on to say,"I understand very well...

1
ionb 13.02.14 9:05pm
custard cream
Sphinx riddles made easier, answers to be phoned in to premium rate number 0
sydalg 13.02.14 9:03pm
sydalg
German man who had sex change suffers from Herr loss 0
sydalg 13.02.14 8:53pm
sydalg
Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey, to be reclassified as a period drama. 0
carlosmanwelly 13.02.14 8:46pm
carlosmanwelly
Severe flooding floods flooding flood, water flooding rain flooding flooded

Severe floods floods floods, the UK flooding flooded flooding, flooding floods. Incompetent environment secretary Owen Floods flood 'Flooding flooding floods, flooding water water floods.' Flooding...

7
The Paper Ostrich 13.02.14 8:44pm
Lindy Moone
Hi, I’m Mike Read from radio 1, nothing to do with jimmy saville, who I detest

Mike Read from radio 1 t shirts are still available from the the Mike Read book of Mike Read...

0
farmer giles 13.02.14 8:40pm
farmer giles
"Everyone taking statins could be a real life saver" - drug company accountants

More to follow...

1
apepper 13.02.14 8:38pm
Electrelane
Dawlish track repair delayed due to cross whale 3
Underconstruction 13.02.14 8:37pm
jimmydodger
Public shocked by celebrity with no sexual assault allegations 0
Dumbnews 13.02.14 8:14pm
Dumbnews
Somerset Car Owner Charged With Diving Without Care And Attention 0
Titus 13.02.14 8:04pm
Titus