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London ready for 2013 Olympics claims government 0
apepper 3 years

More follows next year...

Mensa introduce associate member category “Lensa” for very attractive simpletons 15
Yikes 3 years

In a move publically stated to be to combat elitism, but privately acknowledged to be to increase their chances of getting a date, Mensa has created an associate member category called “Lensa”...

Juan Carlos tries to blame Ashley Giles. 'It was King of Spin.' he protests. 0
weematt 3 years
Olympic motto revealed: "London 2012 costing too much" 4
grumblechops 3 years

The BBC pretty much wrote that for me...

Council declares 6-yard box at Stamford Bridge as no parking zone 0
Ado 3 years

Més sobte...

"Bog It Up" Home Secretary, May, Heads To Heathrow Again..... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

To do 'tick, tack, toe' on some poor sucker immigration officer...

“Stroke turned me into Deputy PM” - Clegg 1
clicktingstampz 3 years

DEPUTY Prime Minister Nick Clegg told last night's BBC documentary “I Woke Up With Dave” how a stroke he suffered two years ago propelled him to power., He said: “I was with some other LibDem...

Italian museum director's suspected heart attack revealed to be just 'art burn' 0
Screenie 3 years
Employment Minister: Give a 'hoodie' your job. More soon 1
Old Hat 3 years
Boffins in tasteless gag breakthrough 0
clicktingstampz 3 years

Scientists say they have perfected a computer which can establish precisely how soon after the death of a celebrity it is acceptable to make a tasteless joke at their expense., A team from the...

Dave Should Go To Euros Says Mate 1
Hooch 3 years

After scoring the winning goal in the local Seven a side pub finals Dave’s mate has made the case for him to lead the line for England this summer. It continued his fine form this season, the peak...

Minister in hot water for boiling a homophobic swede. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 3 years
Onlookers horrified at Jim Davidson's cake on Sweedish Master Chef 0
Scronnyglonkle 3 years
London 2012 Games motto revealed: 'Our logo still looks utter shite' 0
pinxit 3 years
Government to excile Boris Johnson to Spain for period of 2012 Olympics 0
Scronnyglonkle 3 years
Robert Mugabe in ‘racist cake’ controversy 2
Old Hat 3 years

Robert Mugabe is facing hushed whispers to step down after he was photographed cutting a cake in the form of naked Swedish culture minister, Lena Adelsohn. The incident involving Mr Mugabe happened...

BBC hopes for summer ratings winner with "Underwater Masterchef" 0
Nails UK 3 years
Doctors unite to fight obesity with ridicule 13
Mandy Lifeboat 3 years

Organisations representing nearly every doctor in the UK have come together to promote ridicule as the most effective measure in combating obesity. Royal Medical Colleges spokesman Prof Terence...

'Run faster you bastards' revealed as 2012 Olympic motto 1
jp1885 3 years
Abu Qatada can't be deported until "Homeland" series ends, says Euro-Court 0
Hideous 3 years

Home Secretary, Theresa May's latest attempt to deport radical preacher Abu Qatadar, has failed after it was blocked by the European Court of Human Rights. Qatadar's lawyers lodged their appeal with...

Food poisoning epidemic traced to Guardian's 'Keep Clam And Carry On' feature 2
cinquecento 3 years

.., .. hat tip to jp1885 on a parallel track....

Anders Breivik barred from court due to smirking ban 0
Skylarking 3 years

more slappable racist tosh soon...

Mussel comes out as bivalve 0
cinquecento 3 years

.. more shellfish humour soon...

Man finds his dream date at a surreal fruit stall 0
Smart Alex 3 years
Internet forums in crisis after IMHO revealed to mean ‘In My Hairy Orifice’ 0
jp1885 3 years
‘Keep Calm and Regularly Check Your Prostate’ a slogan too far say consumers 0
jp1885 3 years

Charity group Cancer Research UK has come under fire from angry consumers after its latest awareness campaign: ‘Keep Calm and Regularly Check Your Prostate’, was blasted as taking the popular...

North Koreans claim rocket launch was "Titanic Tribute" 0
apepper 3 years

The North Koreans have claimed that their rocket crashing and sinking into the sea was, in fact, a carefully planned tribute to the Titanic which sank 100 years ago. "It seems very insensitive to...

Study finds that teenagers are lazy bastards. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Londoners complain about their looted TVs as analogue signal is switched off. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Punter stands to win millions on deadly bet 5
pinxit 3 years

A Woking man will be following Sunday's London Marathon with more than a little interest as he stands to win over two million pounds from the bookies if a certain runner suffers a fatality. After...