The NewsBiscuit Writers' Room
Everything on these pages has been submitted by readers of the site and appears here unedited. Potential front page stories as well as one-liners for the ticker bar are welcome, so if you would like to write for NewsBiscuit please post your article on this submission board and then attempt to give yourself maximum votes over and over again. The most prolific and successful contributors will be considered for the coveted title of 'Writer of the Month'.
|Topic — Add New »||Comments||Votes||Author||Freshness|
|Government complain hate clerics deportation appeals 'Abu s of process'||0||
|Norfolk man traces family tree all the way back to his sister||8||
62 year old James Gait from Holt in Norfolk is delighted that, after many hours work, he has managed to trace his family tree back many generations all the way to to his sister, Richard. Mr Gait...
|It's Anne Widdycombe or Sir Cliff for new Archbishop of Canterbury post.||0||
The Church of England synod declared today the names of two candidates for the position of the next Archbishop of Canterbury. They are frumpish ex tory MP, now minor celebrity, Anne Widdycombe. And...
|Girl in US Secret Service scandal gets the sack||0||
|Man Down Under Now Man Six Feet Under.||2||
||Haywood Manley||3 years|
|“100 days to go”, British infrastructure warns sport-loving foreigners||1||
||Old Hat||3 years|
British Infrastructure was enthusiastically pulsating with buttock-clenching anticipation last night, following the announcement that there were only 100 days to go before he could start shafting...
|Chelsea fan claims Champions League credit after tweeting "#prayfordrogba"||4||
||seymour totti||3 years|
Armchair Chelsea fan, Barry Nicholls, 39, has been a lifelong supporter for the last 7 years. He was unable to get a ticket for Wednesday's Champions League match against Barcelona, so thought he...
|Deceased Men At Work Flautist accused of copying Amy Winehouse.||0||
||seymour totti||3 years|
|Tanker drivers to vote on action when they return from skiing holidays.||0||
|King of Spain apologises to poor peasants, Queen offers cake.||0||
|White supremacist group decides to drop Black Power salute. More soon.||0||
|The Reign in Spain shoots mainly on the Plains||0||
|Scientists who cured mice of blindness hope to sew their tails back on soon.||1||
|Lord Coe launches countdown to ’50 days to go’ countdown||3||
With London 2012's '100 days to go' countdown firmly behind him, Lord Coe is keen to build on its success by launching a countdown to the '50 days to go' countdown. Coe has hand-picked a team of...
|Traumatised woman, 19, tells of Premier League footballer hell||5||
A TRAUMATISED young woman has described the horrifying moment she was treated with dignity and respect by a Premier League footballer., Wiping away tears, the 19-year-old hairdresser from Preston,...
|Austrian village Fucking to change name to the village formerly known as Fucking||6||
The Austrian village of Fucking is to vote on a name change in an attempt to escape the constant ridicule and attention the name attracts the hamlet. Road signs bearing the village’s name are...
|Screaming kid with bad handwriting 'got a Ryvita for his birthday'.||1||
|'Copycat' fan blames Coronation Street for his dull argumentative lifestyle||3||
A Cheshire man obsessed with ITV's Coronation Street is blaming the long-running soap for his 'meaningless and confrontational existence'., The man who cannot be identified for legal reasons claims...
|Bolton request stop to recovery prayers as Muamba starts to develop super powers||8||
|Olympic Travel Advice: Londoners Should Plan Extra Month Into Mass Migration||2||
Transport for London and the Olympic Organising Committee have revealed travel plans for the games for those lucky enough to have tickets to the events, and those meant to be working during the two...
|Hollywood to make China murder movie "as soon as someone understands it"||1||
Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Danny Davito and Ewan McGregor are all slated for major roles in a Hollywood retelling of the Neil Haywood case, which is due to start filming in Pinewood and Chonqing...
|Even Danish cartoonists "not going anywhere near" Breivik satire yet||1||
|Annie Lennox found alive and well in hotel bathtub||10||
||Gary Stanton||3 years|
Tributes to the hugely popular recording artist Annie Lennox were pouring in last night after she was found lying in approximately eighteen inches of lukewarm bathwater, apparently none the worse for...
|Damien Hirst delights art world with 'Giant Greggs Pasty in Cameron's botty'||0||
Celebrated artist Damien Hirst has unveiled what he believes to be a "True dovetailing of northern and southern britain" in his new work "Giant Greggs pasty shoved up David Cameron's botty" and which...
|The evidence: Simon Cowell not full of Shit||0||
Extracts from Tom Bowyer's forthcoming unauthorised biography have revealed that Simon Cowell is addicted to daily Colonic irrigation treatments. A source close to Cowell stated that the problem had...
|Sex act ponders name change to avoid confusion with Austrian village||0||
|Tibetan monks protest at high cost of petrol||2||
||Mandy Lifeboat||3 years|
|Isle of Wight "falling into information black hole".||0||
||Al OPecia||3 years|
|Agitated Juan Carlos abdicates owing to 'Elephant in the Tomb'||0||
|King Juan Carlos misses elephant, shoots himself in the foot.||0||
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