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Latest On Foreign Secretary Hague's "Lone Tory Medal"....... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

..Presented to him by the leader of Wath-on-Dearne Council, South Yorkshire., Hague occasionally polishes it...

Embarrassment as US ‘Giant Monkey Alarm’ cancelled 56 years after order issued. 0
SingingHinny 3 years

The US secretary of defense announced today that the Giant Monkey Alert has been downgraded to ‘Less likely than Godzilla’ so that the government can concentrate on the threat of global terrorism...

Cameron to attack Spain after two hour launch threat of cucumbers is revealed. 0
Basil_B 3 years
Quick check on Sepp Blatter's address book clearly reveals he knows no shame 0
Basil_B 3 years
BBC news story wins coveted 'Dullest story ever' award 14
Screenie 3 years

The BBC news story 'Three quarters of UK workers half an hour from work' has already been given the dullest news story this millenium award., 'We realise we may have gone a little early with this,'...

Bank robber finds his PPI doesn't cover him for being jailed. 0
greg various 3 years

No house soon...

French supermarkets to negotiate surrender terms with new German E. coli strain 0
Qoxiivi 3 years
"Order 40 McDs burgers with fresh salad" say German extreme sport fanatics 0
thackaray 3 years
Football Internationals in shirt lifting ban 1
Dick Everyman 3 years

FIFA’s executive committee has today announced a series of new regulations governing international matches. One proposal that has now been adopted was submitted by the Federation of Uganda...

“New strain” of E-coli may be aware of irony. 0
SingingHinny 3 years
Glasgow Waitrose misprices beer at 1/3 price. Bargain at £5 per bottle. 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Indignant F1 Stewards accuse Lewis Hamilton of 'Playing the Race Car' 2
pinxit 3 years
NASA Admits Faking Woodstock 2
mugwump 3 years
German police discover secret Al Qaeda cucumber farm. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Man fails to develop superpowers after bite from radioactive Japanese spider 4
dicky37 3 years

A UK tourist was left feeling "cheated" after being bitten by a spider while visiting a zoo close to the beleaguered Fukushima nuclear plant., Pete Wrayford of Bath later complained of not being...

Tesco to sell grandmothers for sixpence 0
beau-jolly 3 years
Bum note 0
FraserWords 3 years

Pippa Middleton's backside is new judge on Britain's Got Talent - more soon...

Royals award Diamond Jubilee to North Korea 0
FraserWords 3 years

BRITAIN’S Royal family has awarded the 2012 Diamond Jubilee to North Korea., Chief negotiator the Duke of Edinburgh revealed the decision to ask the controversial Asian nation to host the...

Pandemic feared as source of E Coli. outbreak traced to Sepp Blatter’s mouth . 0
Gary Stanton 3 years

The deadly E Coli. outbreak cutting a swathe through Central Europe has been traced to the mouth of Sepp Blatter, after the autocratic FIFA president was spotted spouting huge quantities of faeces . ...

India outsources jobs to Glasgow 2
Dick Everyman 3 years

The Indian Ministry of Communication and Information Technology (IMCIT) announced today that it is to outsource two hundred call-centre jobs to Glasgow. Earlier contenders Stoke-on-Trent and Merthyr...

Tipp-Ex to sponsor new correctional facility 0
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Pastry chef with Bombe strapped to leg stages bake-off in Bank 0
simonjmr 3 years
Security checks completed on new Fifa executives, Dr Ubungme & General M'Bezzla 1
ronseal 3 years
Peter Kaye tribute act conceeds "I'm just a fat northerner remembering things" 0
simonjmr 3 years
Sepp Blatter offered new executive role at Haringay Social Services 0
ronseal 3 years
New Incoterm introduced, UHP (Undelivered Hijacked by Pirates) 0
Iamthestig 3 years
British diet 'unaffected' by caution over e-coli. 0
SingingHinny 3 years
Asylum-seeker amnesty hampered by inappropriately small boxes. 0
SingingHinny 3 years
Hackers winning cyber war after finding list of believable names 0
3 years

The US Military last night warned of an escalation in attacks by hackers, seeking top secret information from computer systems. A US security expert warned that the attacks are becoming ever-more...

Houlier sacking from Villa on health grounds, too many fans have been in agony 0
simonjmr 3 years