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A Tawdry Remit is confirmed for Dr Fox's friend 0
simonjmr 3 years

Dear Army Twit, Dame Tart Wiry, Dream Wary Tit, Married Twaty, Mated Rat Wiry, Reward May Tit More soon...

Stephen Fry of only average intelligence, scientists report 0
Clarky 3 years

Using powerful mass hypnotism, triggered by a knowing smirk to camera, Stephen Fry has fooled the world for decades, making everyone think …...

Adam Werritty is Minister of Magic 0
apepper 3 years

In a shock announcement, it's been revealed that Adam Werritty is not actually a friend of Liam Fox but is, in fact, the Minister of Magic. The long rumoured position was in a similar quasi-legal...

Meryl Streep bad actor, boffins conclude 0
Clarky 3 years

Using powerful mass hypnotism, triggered by the use of funny foreign accents, Meryl Streep has fooled the world for decades, making everyone think …...

Dry Cleaners deny drug trade rumours 0
Drylaw 3 years

The Legion of British Dry Cleaners last night released a press statement strongly denying recent allegations regarding their business practices in UK. "We are not and never have been connected to...

George Clooney not really good-looking, investigation reveals 0
Clarky 3 years

Using powerful mass hypnotism, triggered by a playful crinkle of his eyes, George Clooney has fooled the world for decades, making everyone think …...

Dr Fox "we can deploy Comic Sans within 30 minutes" 0
simonjmr 3 years

Embattled Dr Liam Fox has today announced that the UK can deploy "Comic Sans" within 30 minutes, in the hope that this news will deflect attention away from the Werrity scandal that has erupted...

Renault targets impulse killer market with extra boot space 4
vertical 3 years

is nothing sacred here....

delightfullyodd 3 years

FOLLOWING the recent story that a man was told to delete photographs of his daughter taken in Braehead Shopping Centre in Glasgow by Police and Security staff, the Scottish Government has today...

"Universe is leaning slightly", claims builders of Big Ben 7
apepper 3 years

The building company who constructed St Stephen's clock tower (generally known as "Big Ben") have claimed that the entire universe is tilted by .26 degrees. "This is a huge problem.", they went on,...

Fox hounded from office 2
apepper 3 years

The hunt is on...

Tesco launch “Fetch” produced from pure pedigree dogs 1
witless 3 years

Tesco announce their launch of a new range of foods produced from excess to requirement pet dogs. Recipes developed by TV chef Hugh Burnley-Whittinghall hit the shelves tomorrow including Boxer dog...

New 'We Told You So' android app enrages downed blackberry users 0
vertical 3 years
Hackers say iJobs is riddled with bugs 1
witless 3 years
Defence Minister's wife found second man in marital bed 1
roybland 3 years

The wife of beleaguered Defence Secretary Liam Fox said she was surprised one night to find her husband's friend Adam Werritty in bed with them. 'But when Adam produced a business card saying he was...

Met police appeal for help with new acronym in fight against gun crime 3
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

The Metropolitan Police have issued a public appeal for help with creating a ‘really cool sounding acronym’ in an attempt to reduce gun crime in London. Deputy Commissioner Tim Godwin is...

Norwich man fills loft 5
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Paul Wykes from Norwich is claiming to have achieved an historic first by having completely filled the loft in his semi-detached house with things that his wife wishes he’d throw away. Paul, 38,...

All references to BIG BEN now must be written in Italics 1
Rowly 3 years

[i]BIG BEN [/i]more later...

West Ham lose ebay auction for Olympic stadium to mystery bidder 'Cambs€101' 0
button 3 years
Saw 8 flops after Jigsaw bows to health and safety regulations 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Fans of excessively gory horror films with ludicrous plots have been left disappointed by the latest instalment of the popular Saw franchise. Saw 8, developed in secret amongst much speculation,...

Tate Modern to host Hollywood Blockbusters and Bowling from 2012 1
kga6 3 years

As modern art becomes increasingly indistinguishable from looking at every day objects being used in their natural environment, the Tate Modern has admitted that soon it will no longer be financially...

Mcartney admits Nancy had been acting as a "go between" during previous marriage 1
Rowly 3 years

less chance of rolling off, /'\ rather than /'...

OK to make jokes about disabilities of people you don't like, research finds 0
DrTurmoil 3 years
Turn to the Far Right "Accidental" says Paulo di Canio 0
medici2471 3 years
"Inflation out of control - shoe bill doubled" says McCartney 2
andhrimnir 3 years
Royal Mail withdraws UK Landmarks stamp series in terror threat fears 0
pere floza 3 years
Tescos deny encouraging murderers to shop at Asda 1
Runestone Cowboy 3 years
Fantatist Dr Fox and Werrity 0
simonjmr 3 years
Migrants may soon teach history in UK schools 0
roybland 3 years
Liam Fox can't be sacked because, and I'm not making this up, he has a cat! 0
bonjonelson 3 years