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Jerry Lee Lewis denies assaulting pianos as concern grows over more Lee cases

Rock n roll legend Jerry Lee Lewis has denied standing on, kicking, and slapping multiple pianos. One piano, a baby grand, said “Lewis violently abused me, sometimes in public. He knew what he...

2
nickb 05.10.12 5:27pm
Prince Philip Doesn't Die Peacefully In His Sleep

Some funny lines there!...

2
Stanleys Dad 05.10.12 4:33pm
Newly discovered mammoth first thought to be Ann Widdicombe with furry coat on 1
philthefunk 05.10.12 4:31pm
Mark Hughes tells press that he is the best man for the QPR managers salary 1
grottymonty 05.10.12 4:30pm
Ashley Cole denies insult. 'Some of my best friends are twats' 4
Perks 05.10.12 3:44pm
charlies_hat
Butner Correctional Institution Pudding Club goes nationwide

Happy prisoners at Butner Correctional Institution in North Carolina have setup a pudding club so successful that prison guards and even the prison governor have joined in. Members of the pudding...

3
AReader 05.10.12 3:14pm
AReader
Predicitive text got me in to trouble claims Cole

"I was trying to say Twits" claims Ashley Cole. It's not dissimmilar to the form of mental and verbal predictive text that John Terry suffers from. More soon...

0
simonjmr 05.10.12 2:59pm
simonjmr
"Creator of rushing around like a blue arsed fly" to be on Prince Philip's obit 0
simonjmr 05.10.12 2:37pm
simonjmr
God admits bidding process for Life on Earth was ‘fundamentally flawed’

God will re-run the bidding process for the ‘Life in our Solar System’ franchise after a successful legal challenge by Martian Aliens found serious flaws in the Earth’s original business case....

0
Mandy Lifeboat 05.10.12 2:33pm
Mandy Lifeboat
BBC unveils new show ‘Strictly Come Noncing’

The BBC has announced plans for a brand new show next autumn, ‘Strictly Come Noncing.’ Set in a well known maximum security prison on the Isle of Wight, celebrities will be put through the grind...

2
Dick Everyman 05.10.12 12:53pm
Dick Everyman
Leyton Orient could go through 're-branding exercise'

Barry Hearn, owner of Leyton Orient FC has not ruled out changing the club's name if it moves to the Olympic Stadium., Suggested alternatives so far are The Orient Stratford Takeaway, Leyton Hewitt,...

0
philthefunk 05.10.12 12:39pm
philthefunk
"Zombie Jimmy Saville fucked my fireplace," claims postmistress

Police in North Yorkshire are investigating claims that the late Jimmy Saville has risen from the grave and is now indiscriminately molesting anything he can get his putrified hands on. In a public...

13
jamsieoconnor 05.10.12 11:30am
jamsieoconnor
SPATIAL OFFER

Tardis. One careful owner. VGC. Clock may have been doctored. OIRO 500,000 Pandaks...

2
Scroat 05.10.12 11:19am
jamsieoconnor
'Odd' IT Manager accused of being a PDF File. 4
riesler 05.10.12 11:06am
riesler
French beekeepers cross bees, Bernard Manning and Ben Dover - create blue honey 0
simonjmr 05.10.12 10:52am
simonjmr
Riot police helpless in face of angry, non-confrontational mob

Truncheon-wielding riot police in full body armour were left disoriented and confused in Birmingham yesterday as they attempted to control an obviously angry, but non-confrontational crowd who...

6
Re Pete 05.10.12 10:14am
sigmund
Woman, now 39, rescued from compartment in Jim'll Fix It Chair 0
cinquecento 05.10.12 10:07am
cinquecento
Scarborough pulps 2013 tourist brochures following grave desecration...

Sally Hunter, Tourism Officer for the scruffy North Yorkshire resort, admitted that promoting Scarborough as the last resting place of Jimmy Savile now seemed an ill-judged strategy. “We’ve...

0
Tripod 05.10.12 9:32am
Tripod
BBC's Off Payroll Taxation loophole shocks MP's

because they wish they'd thought of it...

0
philthefunk 05.10.12 9:28am
philthefunk
Spain protests against introduction of controversial ‘day-shift’ working

Spain’s major cities awoke to a series of protests yesterday evening following the announcement that controversial Nordic-style day-shift working was to be introduced in an attempt to enable Spain...

11
Des Custard 05.10.12 9:11am
Midfield Diamond
Boxer who has come out reported to be 'as pleased as punch' 0
philthefunk 05.10.12 9:10am
philthefunk
Baywatch star buys discounted toupee of exceptional quality

Neat-O, last gasp effort http://singharoundtheworld.typepad.com/.a/6a00e54f88e3b6883301156f2a433b970c-800wi...

0
charlies_hat 05.10.12 9:07am
charlies_hat
Biologists working on inherited traits discover that...

if your parents didn't have children, then it's unlikely that you'll have children either...

2
Smart Alex 05.10.12 8:16am
arthurminnit
Ventriloquist secret of Party Leaders’ autocue free speeches

Top ventriloquist, Alan Reeder, has blown the whistle on our party leaders’ note free speeches by revealing that he is, quite literally, the voice behind David Cameron and Ed Miliband. Although...

2
Stan 05.10.12 8:08am
Sinnick
‘Wiggins effect’ boosts nation’s health...

According to Matt Peters, a surgeon at the Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital, the post-Olympic cycling craze is having a beneficial effect on the nation’s health. “It’s great”, he says,...

0
Tripod 05.10.12 7:12am
Tripod
It was a close fought contest and out of 20,000 willing people, Michael Winner

announces Dignitas will help him die...

0
burnmybridges 05.10.12 1:34am
burnmybridges
BBC says their inclusivity policy extends to pedophiles but they draw the.....

BBC says their inclusivity policy extends to pedophiles but they draw the line at women over 50...

0
george.scofield 04.10.12 11:52pm
george.scofield
Gareth Malone invites 25 sheets of paper to form The Quire 1
Smart Alex 04.10.12 10:07pm
sigmund
One week only; buy Jerry Dammers, get Terry Hall free. 8
sigmund 04.10.12 10:04pm
sigmund
Romney wins debate, world shits itself

Not funny. Too scary to be funny...

4
Miss Hegas 04.10.12 9:59pm
Analsley Harriott