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Relatives : Shame Savile not alive to refute claims he was a crap shag.

The family of the late Sir Jimmy Savile were saddened after an ITV documentary cast doubt on his sexual prowess. The program featured several women claiming to have had sex with him in the 70s &...

MADJEZ 04.10.12 4:38pm
Thomas the Tank Engine saves West Coast line

Thomas the Tank engine is to come to the rescue of Patrick McLoughlin, Britain’s new Transport Secretary in an offer to run West Coast services for a bag of dolly mixtures and a sack of coal from...

Dick Everyman 04.10.12 4:24pm
Dick Everyman
National treasure Captain Birdseye knighted for tireless children's charity work

Buckingham Palace has revealed its plan to knight Captain Horace Birdseye. The Captain (71) first rose to fame in a series of TV commercials in the 1970s, where he served up large platters of...

Skylarking 04.10.12 4:11pm
Skegness's Jolly Fisherman to be put on the Sex Offenders list, just in case 0
simonjmr 04.10.12 3:52pm
Think tank report to claim 50% of everything 'below average' 9
Mandy Lifeboat 04.10.12 3:51pm
Heidi Klum reveals split from Seal revolved around her tiring of balancing his

balls on her nose...

burnmybridges 04.10.12 2:10pm
BBC chiefs admit they knew DJ Moyles was ‘a bit shit’

Embarrassed executives at Broadcasting house have finally admitted that they were aware of the ‘inappropriate behaviour’ of one of their most enduring DJs. But with millions of listeners now...

Runestone Cowboy 04.10.12 1:37pm
Jimmy Savile plaque replaced by locals Apologies for my poor job here - anyone any good with photoshop ?...

charlies_hat 04.10.12 1:34pm
Hodgson in tube train horror - spoke to fellow traveller 0
Sinnick 04.10.12 1:29pm
Romney debates Obama's face off.

US president Barack "The Barackade" Obama has had his head debated in by republican rival Mitt "The Mittens" Romney. In a heated pre debate press conference Romney repeatedly shouted "I'm going to...

moanygit 04.10.12 1:09pm
Mona Lisa remains found in Tescos car park Bob Hoskins says every little helps 0
burnmybridges 04.10.12 12:59pm
Tabloid press display journalistic gravitas over Savile accusations

pinxit 04.10.12 12:28pm
Jonny Shlep
Saville Row - Family insist Sir Jim was fitted up. 1
reforse 04.10.12 12:08pm
Gary Glitter denies he raped 14 years old as they are way out of his age range,

2 seven year old,now we are talking...

burnmybridges 04.10.12 12:04pm
Woman's headache cured by black mamba injection 1
Psycadelic Squirrel 04.10.12 12:02pm
UKIP to re-brand themselves as BNP lite. 4
Deadcode 04.10.12 11:27am
RyanAir to bid for West Coast Railway for it's London to Edinburgh route. 0
philthefunk 04.10.12 11:26am
Mona Lisa remains found in Florence car park.

Experts have unearthed what they think are the remains of Leonardo Da Vinci's enigmatic model, Mona Lisa., Real name Sharon Burton from Torquay, she was spotted on holiday in 1506 by the young...

philthefunk 04.10.12 11:23am
Poetry Week, no 6

It's amazing how rumours can travel,, since the death of Mr J Savile., To "Fix" his Urgins@,, was he fingering Virgins?., his reputation begins to unravel. With a demeanor as pure as a Vicar's,...

Rowly 04.10.12 11:07am
In celebration of 'National Poetry Week', Celebrity Poems no5

The Randy Old Bugger stood by the spinning decks, His fingers full of jinglers, He had one hand down his shorts, And the other up a teenagers J. Savile...

philthefunk 04.10.12 10:25am
Cadburys win bid to own the colour purple. Whoopi Goldberg said to be furious 0
george.scofield 04.10.12 10:02am
Prince Harry to tour Adele after Afghanistan 0
philthefunk 04.10.12 10:01am
Following investigations

into the Jimmy Saville scandal at the BBC,police have now recieved evidance from none other than Bubbles the chimp of the late Michael Jackson.Bubbles has spoken to police that he and other chimps...

Banzai 04.10.12 9:51am
Dave Grigger
Jim, Can you fix it for me to beat these sex offence charges, asks fellow BBC DJ 0
ronseal 04.10.12 9:49am
West Coast Rail bid delayed by 'wrong type of civil servant' 1
philthefunk 04.10.12 9:28am
NUS Report Floppy-Haired-Indie-Kids are now “Critically Endangered”

As universities across the country return to lectures, the slow dwindling of the population of floppy-haired-indie-kids has now reached crisis point, with the NUS upgrading them from endangered to...

james_doc 04.10.12 9:18am
Ed Miliband

has apologised for any confusion that his speech has caused. The One Nation he was talking about was China...

philthefunk 04.10.12 9:09am
Public to Endure another David Blaine "Feat of Endurance"

Professional attention seeker David Blaine will once more subject the general public to another pointless, essentially risk-free stunt., Blaine's doctor outlined the risks and then described how in...

moanygit 04.10.12 8:58am
Women in Saudi IKEA catalogue “just got lost looking for the cafe”

IKEA has defended the publication of a catalogue for Saudi Arabia without pictures of women in it by asserting that the brochure was intended to feature both sexes, but that all their models had...

Sir Lupus 04.10.12 8:50am
looking sideways
Now then pop pickers....

here are some new entries for this weeks hit parade., In at 10 - Gary Glitter, At No.9 - Can I Touch You There - Jimmy & The Saviles, New Entry - No.8 - My Ding-a-Ling - The Mandevilles, No.7...

philthefunk 04.10.12 8:13am