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Greece reveals financial recovery plan "A Tenner on Murray to win at Wimbledon"

more later...

dvo4fun 26.06.12 6:11pm
Hodgson blames 'lack of tatoos' for Euro exit.

As the inquest into England’s European Championship exit continues, manager Roy Hodgson has identified the squad’s general lack of tattoos and stupid hairstyles as one of the key factors behind...

TheNewsWalrus 26.06.12 2:49pm
custard cream
Computer Glitch Crediting Bank Accounts In Error Rectified Within 2 Minutes

Nat to Worry...

Duff 24.02.14 7:02pm
Al OPecia
Internet Trolls demand faster connectivity beneath bridges

A spokesman for the Troll community today called on the government to improve network connectivity in their natural habitat, claiming data transfer speeds achievable beneath bridges often fall...

grumblechops 27.06.12 12:58am
Indian mystic draws the line at walking across a pit of lego

An Indian mystic who regularly walks across red hot coals and broken glass has today withdrawn from an attempt to walk across an 11 ft pit of lego. "I have thought long and hard about this challenge...

simonjmr 27.06.12 4:02pm
Salmon of Knowledge
Queen refuses meeting with Martine McCutcheon 0
custard cream 26.06.12 10:58am
custard cream
Martin McGuinness to use special hook hand to show solidarity with Abu Hamzer 0
custard cream 26.06.12 10:54am
custard cream
Royal Handshake Sponsorship Concerns

With thousands of people lining the streets in Belfast waiting to greet the Queen, concerns have been expressed about the over commercialisation of her Diamond Jubilee - presented by De Beers -tour....

custard cream 26.06.12 3:51pm
Royal Handshake Sponsorship Concerns

With thousands of people are lining the streets in Belfast waiting to greet the Queen, concerns have been expressed about the over commercialisation of her Diamond Jubilee - presented by De Beers...

custard cream 26.06.12 10:39am
custard cream
Murray aims high – hopefully just over net and before baseline 0
Yikes 26.06.12 10:31am
Kate bemused by edict to curtsy to princesses who don’t use tampons

The Duchess of Cambridge has promised to dutifully obey the Queen’s revised Order of Precedence and curtsy to the “blood princesses” even though she reportedly finds the whole thing a bit odd....

Yikes 26.06.12 10:15am
Flatulent Amateur Golfer worried about follow through 0
seymour totti 26.06.12 8:58am
seymour totti
Slaughter of first-borns to save country £50 bn in Child Benefit, pledge Tories

In a radical overhaul of the welfare system, David Cameron has set out plans for a measured policy of infanticide that could massively reduce the UK deficit, according to experts. The proposed...

Gary Stanton 26.06.12 12:57pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Prudish Dulux spokeman clarifies "There are only 15 shades of grey" 0
charlies_hat 26.06.12 8:43am
Ballerina quartet to adopt a four tutu formation. 8
weematt 27.06.12 8:56am
Retirement home football team still hoping for first clean sheet. 2
weematt 26.06.12 8:10am
wrong place... 0
medici2471 26.06.12 7:21am
Ann Summers launches new '50 Grades of Shea' lubricant. 0
weematt 26.06.12 7:20am
World Wide Fund for Nature steps in as Cockneys become endangered species.

They were almost hunted to extinction by the Krays during the sixties, partly beautiful plumage of the Pearly Kings and Queens. A captive breeding program is underway in a site of special scientific...

Ian Searle 26.06.12 6:53am
Ian Searle
Paul Simon and EL James to release 50 ways to relieve your lover 2
charlies_hat 26.06.12 7:23am
Virgin rebirthing scheme exposed

[i]Our Afterlife correspondent reports[/i]: In a dramatic turn of events, just hours after news broke of 72 Richard Bransons greeting a suicide bomber in Paradise, a scheme has been uncovered...

26.06.12 8:19am
Pontiff remains tight-lipped about 'papal prophylactics'

A spokesman for the company behind the new 'Vatican Tickler' range of Pope-shaped condoms has told of plans for an aggressive campaign, as they prepare to insert themselves into a tight market. He...

26.06.12 2:32am
Scottish independence "hangs on Murray's performance"

A senior government spokesman has admitted that if Andy Murray wins Wimbledon, he will become irrevocably British and Scottish independence will therefore be impossible. "There's just no way England...

apepper 25.06.12 11:24pm
Under 25's to get pocket money 'if they have a tidy bedroom' says David Cameron 0
Mandy Lifeboat 25.06.12 8:07pm
Mandy Lifeboat
Science News - Venus transits Wimbledon. 0
Maverick 25.06.12 7:57pm
Dismay as suicide bomber met in heaven by 72 Richard Bransons. 2
Maverick 26.06.12 5:36am
Business News - BT announces bulk deal with Autistic Society. More soon. 0
Maverick 25.06.12 7:52pm
Discovering the dark truth of life on housing benefits.

In a sign of how our desparate age of austerity is pitching ordinary working people against each other, we spoke with a man, currently of no fixed abode. We'll call him David. David, 46, comes...

Miss Hegas 27.06.12 6:59am
David Cameron to Stop Subsidised Swimming for Diving Doleys

In the most far reaching welfare reforms since 1945, David Cameron has pledged to eradicate half price swimming sessions for the unemployed by 2015. "It's costing the tax payer literally billions"...

The Masked Frog 25.06.12 5:46pm
The Masked Frog
PM plans to eliminate poverty by killing off poor people

More to follow...

apepper 25.06.12 4:45pm