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Singer misses Grammys after one too many grammies 0
dvo4fun 3 years
Wheelchair menace threatens Midlands city 13
Major Clanger 3 years

The Chief Constable of Nottingham today appealed to the Government for additional funding to tackle the growing threat of motorised wheelchair and disabled scooter gangs. “The city centre is...

Ice-fall woman, 90, accused of ‘diving’ by off-duty football ref. 6
malgor 3 years

The Football Association has granted pensioner Edith Perkins the right of appeal against a straight red card shown her by off-duty football referee Ron Withenshaw. The incident occurred during a...

Abu Qatada tipped as next England manager 0
roybland 3 years

Commentators have predicted that extremist preacher Abu Qatada will soon be appointed England football manager on the grounds that he will be paid less than if he claimed welfare benefits. The...

BBC annouce new post watershed entertainment show "Gloryhole in the wall" 2
button 3 years
British Museum offer bailiff services in case of Greek default 4
quango 3 years

The British Museum Plc, the world reknowned debt collection agency, has entered into the first round of tendering for the prized contract of repossessing Greece's assets if they fall behind in their...

Saudi cannabis smoker stoned 9
medici2471 3 years
Kevin Costner weeps as co-star Whitney described as '..and actress' 4
MADJEZ 3 years
911 call tape released, 'Houston, we have a problem' 3
Immunis 3 years
Infant shows Levinson Enquiry vandalised ceiling ornament 2
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

“my mobile’s been hacked”...

Tanned tabloid journalist accused of lying in The Sun 5
Smart Alex 3 years

Surely must have done before but an admittedly very quick Internet search seems to say not...

So a man's had a baby? Oh per-lease, says columnist. Women do it all the time 0
ronseal 3 years

Janet Street Porter was cock a hoop this morning, after friends say she has identified a new seam of sexism in the media. It's hoped the discovery could support about a year's worth of columns. The...

Sport in crisis as footballers leave teams to help communities 0
kimllfixit 3 years

A recent spate of highly paid footballers leaving their teams to become voluntary 5-a-side coaches and scout masters has resulted in a catastrophic shortage of Premiership players. Many of the...

Petrol station flowers a more acceptable Valentine gift than graveyard flowers 4
roybland 3 years

Valentine's Day flowers bought at the last minute from a petrol station forecourt are better received by a beloved than flowers stolen in a panic from a graveyard according to a survey by Bride...

Large television sets blamed for decline in huddling 1
roybland 3 years

The traditional practice of families huddling around their TV sets is almost obsolete since the development of sets with larger screens, a government report on the state of the family warns. The...

Two wrongs don't make a right, but three wrongs make a writ 0
ronseal 3 years
Astronaut has second thoughts on 'The DaVinci Code' 1
Smart Alex 3 years

"I tried reading it back on Earth", admitted NASA astronaut Eugene C. Warpfactor, "and to be totally honest, once I'd put it down I couldn't pick it up. However, up here in the weightless conditions...

Whitney gags 1
cinquecento 3 years
2013 Grammy's to include 'best hyperbole for this years dead addict' award 2
charlies_hat 3 years

jeez - it's getting on my nerves...

LA medics, pioneers in back catalogue resuscitation 0
medici2471 3 years
.. 0
beau-jolly 3 years

Arse. Just seen below and withrawn quietly...

Popularity of Flat screens linked to decline of sex on TV. 2
Zen 3 years
TV advert's jolly pensioners actually in Wonga poverty 0
medici2471 3 years
Dalglish's Mum makes Kenny say sorry for not tidying his room properly in 1962 0
charlies_hat 3 years
SmithKlineBeecham releases Finlax for quantitative easing 0
cinquecento 3 years
Children Once More Free to Sweep Chimneys 5
LizzyG 3 years

David Cameron joined in the celebration of Charles Dickens’ birth today by announcing the return of child labour to the UK. Two hundred years after the birth of the author who is often credited...

It's the end of the line for Houston 1
ronseal 3 years
Charlie from BUPA ad admits faking war record. 5
MADJEZ 3 years

Charlie the loveable pensioner from the latest BUPA ad campaign has broken down and confessed after journalists investigated his background. In the tv Ad he claims to be 83 and goes onto say he won...

FOOTBALLER APOLOGISES!! In other news, riots, bombings etc. 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years
Athens riots awarded AAA rating 0
roybland 3 years