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Passport Staff Crisis Shows More Migrants Needed.

Bribery to become 'way of life'...

Dun Dunkin 12.06.14 2:07pm
Dun Dunkin
EU to rule on whether 'rank stupidity' is a disability

Employers across Europe are today waiting on a decision from the European Courts on whether 'a gross sense of self-entitlement and no self-control' counts as a disability under EU law. Office...

RobArmstrong 12.06.14 2:04pm
Paper recycling up 10,000 percent 0
Idiot 12.06.14 1:17pm
'Salivation Army' could replace water cannon

TPS or ‘Targeted Projectile Spitting’ could be a low cost alternative to water cannon, the Metropolitan Police announced yesterday. A crack team of 100 police ‘power-spitters’, all of them...

nickb 12.06.14 12:37pm
Viewers fuming after Poirot switches to ITV4 just before denouement

"And so my dear Hastings, you see, despite all the indications the murderer is." Viewers may like to retune their sets as we present 'Celebrity Toilet Cleaning'...

Ian Searle 12.06.14 10:35am
Iraq - US-trained force lost unity, morale, leadership, and effectiveness.

Welcome to the west...

Dun Dunkin 12.06.14 10:03am
Dun Dunkin
England and Italy to Play in Sand Pit in Brazilian Beach Football World Cup

The sand is 'ready'...

Dun Dunkin 12.06.14 9:56am
Dun Dunkin
Keith Vaz Introduces Motion to Ban Sugar and Chocolate at Checkouts

After his recent appearance on the ‘ten minute bill’ session, miscreants appearing before Select Committees may well find it useful to bone up on sugar. It is thought that lying bureaucrats and...

Rumour Control 12.06.14 9:38am
Rumour Control
Passport Office Staff Want Footballer Wages or to Make Bribery Legal

Pass the port...

Dun Dunkin 12.06.14 9:33am
Dun Dunkin
New Stephen King Film - Taxi Drivers The Longest Way

In an effort to promote the latest film from Stephen King, London cabbies have practiced their traditional skills, in finding extended routes, going slowly, stopping unnecessarily at crossings and...

Rumour Control 12.06.14 9:05am
Rumour Control
Sepp Blatter's resignation rumours prompt 500,000 Iraqis to flee their homes

, Terror gripped the streets of Mosul as word spread that the President of the ‘Fédération Internationale de Football Association’ (FIFA), or the ‘Quatari Savings and Loan Company’ as it...

Wrenfoe 12.06.14 9:04am
Andy Murray confirms his new coach is ‘the best man for the job’... 1
Tripod 12.06.14 9:02am
Bacon to become official World Cup sponsor

Bacon is to become England’s official ‘World Cup Hangover’ sponsor, beating off other market leaders to land the coveted prize., Rashers of bacon were chosen ahead of other big name brands...

Gerontius 12.06.14 7:35am
Passport Office Latest - "Let's see how you fuggers like it?" says Al Fayed 1
Ian Searle 12.06.14 7:34am
Manaus head groundsman named in England’s starting line-up.

‘Wayne’s had his day’, said Roy Hodgson ‘We need a new under-achiever to blame everything on. Carlos Botella is that man.’...

beckfordburger 12.06.14 6:15am
Sicilian mafia reject "as bad as fifa" claims 1
Bigglesworth 11.06.14 9:12pm
Cabbies strike after app allows users to listen to racism on their phone 0
Adrian Bamforth 11.06.14 8:59pm
Adrian Bamforth
Small backstreet Karachi print shop offers to help resolve UK Passport backlog 0
Smart Alex 11.06.14 8:40pm
Smart Alex
Passport backlog: thousands of Brits wanted a holiday in Cornwall all along

Tens of thousands of people whose foreign holiday have been cancelled because of the passport backlog, now realise they really wanted to go to Cornwall all along. 'We'd booked two weeks on the Costa...

roybland 11.06.14 8:25pm
Uber user nicht uberzeugt 0
custard cream 11.06.14 5:07pm
custard cream
Harry Potter to be banned from school libraries in an independent Scotland 0
Bigglesworth 11.06.14 4:35pm
Alex Salmond donates £1 million to Lord Voldemorte

More to follow...

apepper 11.06.14 4:19pm
TfL anger as protesting cabbies take the longest route....

1000s of London cab drivers protested in the capital today, taking the longest route and brought gridlock to the streets...

Scriptwriter 11.06.14 4:13pm
Oil magnate targeted in viscous attack. 0
Maverick 11.06.14 2:45pm
New movie about insurance assesors based on actuarial events. 0
Maverick 11.06.14 2:04pm
British Aerospace to become official sponsor of 2022 Qatar World Cup 0
bonjonelson 11.06.14 1:37pm
Michael Gove's face evolved to 'get slapped'‏

While current theories in ‘hominin evolution’ suggest beefy facial features were a defence against fist fights; biologists also believe early man needed to ‘pulverise’ purposely annoying...

Wrenfoe 11.06.14 1:16pm
Cost of postage pushes minimum age for receiving letter from Queen to 102 0
Iamstillthestig 11.06.14 1:01pm
Brazil World Cup organisers pray everyone will be fashionably late. 0
MADJEZ 11.06.14 12:19pm
Brazil appeals for surplus "Wet Paint" "Wet Cement" signs 0
knacker 11.06.14 11:17am