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BBC agrees to remove jokes from Blackadder

Education Secretary Michael Gove has persuaded the BBC to remove all the jokes from Blackadder, in a bid to make the historical series "more factual". Mr Gove accused the BBC of misleading the...

0
nickb 08.01.14 6:51pm
nickb
Tory MPs and left-wing academics in famous ceasefire

Peace broke out for a few golden hours earlier today in the bitter conflict between Conservative politicians and historians over the teaching of the First World War in schools. ‘It’s a moment...

2
ianslat 08.01.14 6:40pm
Midfield Diamond
People with Teutonic surnames urged to stay away from ski resorts

With the recent spate of accidents involving German nationals, ski resort officials and safety experts are urging anyone with a Teutonic sounding surname to stay off the slopes. "Whether your name...

18
Dick Everyman 08.01.14 6:14pm
Jesse Bigg
Thomas Hitzlsperger - my shame at being outed as an Aston Villa player 1
custard cream 08.01.14 6:07pm
AReader
BBC to launch “BBC North”

After the success of minority and niche interest channels, the BBC today announced the creation of a channel developed specifically for those living north of the Watford Gap., Named BBC North, the...

2
james_doc 08.01.14 5:45pm
Jesse Bigg
Offically now too late to ask anyone if 'they had a good Christmas' 2
blacklesbianandproudofit 08.01.14 5:06pm
NewBiscuit
Tottenham riots 2.0 postponed “until the weather improves”... 0
Tripod 08.01.14 5:00pm
Tripod
Damon Hill denies ramming Schumacher off-piste.

Well they say revenge is best served cold...

3
MADJEZ 08.01.14 4:40pm
MADJEZ
Police admit suspicious package found at Scottish Airport contains fruit and veg

(Whatever that may be)...

4
Smart Alex 08.01.14 2:44pm
beau-jolly
Man knocked over by hearse offered BOGOF funeral plan 0
custard cream 08.01.14 1:36pm
custard cream
Cancer still looks ‘way cool!’

Scientists and ‘guys with leather jackets’ have hailed the number of smokers reaching the one billion mark as a ringing endorsement of nicotine, pulmonary disease and Dot Cotton. Popular kids now...

3
Wrenfoe 08.01.14 11:35am
AReader
Politicians to replace faulty moral compass with new Ethical Sat Nav

MPs are preparing for the arrival of a new piece of wearable technology that will help them navigate difficult terrain and always guide them towards the high moral ground. The EPS, or Ethical...

8
Ludicity 08.01.14 11:34am
Ludicity
Johnson's hairdresser in New Year's honour list

Boris Johnson’s hairdresser has been awarded an MBE in the New Years honours list for services to ‘hedge trimming’ it has emerged., Harold Perkins, known as ‘Harry’ to his customers, has...

3
Gerontius 08.01.14 11:07am
Son of Barnabas
Paul Flowers and Andy Flower to swap jobs

How much worse could it be?...

1
apepper 08.01.14 9:49am
NewBiscuit
New Law Prevents Politicians Speaking in Public

Changes to the anti-social behaviour laws have had unexpectedly positive consequences after it was revealed that politicians will no longer be able to speak in public or engage in cringe inducing...

0
james_doc 08.01.14 9:16am
james_doc
Urban Outfitters release 'ironic' piss stained trousers 2
David K 08.01.14 8:57am
Dick Everyman
Government accidentally makes entire UK illegal

The British Government has been forced to apologise for the drafting of the Terrorism Act 2000, which has resulted in the arrest of the entire United Kingdom. Under Section 1 of the Act, "terrorism"...

3
jamsieoconnor 08.01.14 7:59am
Titus
Kevin Pietersen and Piers Morgan to form backbone of new Test side

Andy Flower to be replaced by Andy Capp as manager...

0
Nick McCarr 08.01.14 7:08am
Nick McCarr
New Tory policy unveiled: Immigrants to be used as temporary sea-walls. 0
AReader 07.01.14 9:17pm
AReader
Gove attacks left wing reports on Lord Voldemort's death

Education secretary, Michael Gove, has criticised the "left wing" way in which the great wizard war of the late 20th century has been reported. "The Ministry of Magic is regularly shown to be corrupt...

5
apepper 07.01.14 9:16pm
apepper
Wales Washed Up On English Beach

Desperate attempts to tow the principality back out to sea are continuing...

3
Titus 07.01.14 9:15pm
AReader
BBC reveals ‘some patients visit A&E units only once’

Some patients are going to A&E units in the UK only once, a BBC investigation shows. Data from 183 sites obtained under the Freedom of Information Act revealed that thousands of people made just...

2
Dick Everyman 07.01.14 8:49pm
Dick Everyman
A&Es see some consultants up to 50 times in a year 0
Not Amused 07.01.14 8:14pm
Not Amused
Collapse In Immigration Numbers As Coffee With Vaz Deters Foreigners

Heathrow cafe to be renamed "Greasy Coon"...

1
Mike Turbine-Hamilton 07.01.14 8:04pm
AReader
Candy Crush addict admits selling body online for 'extra lives'

A long-suffering London housewife has today spoken of her desperation at dealing with her husband’s severe Candy Crush addiction, claiming that her home life has now become ‘unbearable’....

2
KateWritesStuff 07.01.14 7:27pm
KateWritesStuff
England to pull a sickie for World Cup 2014 0
David K 07.01.14 5:32pm
David K
US company avoid questions about brass ball manufacture

American company, Monkey Parts Inc, is under pressure to explain how they've managed to increase production of brass balls despite freezing weather covering the country...

0
apepper 07.01.14 4:59pm
apepper
Welfare Budget could be reduced with Biblical Floods

Conservative think tanks have reached the conclusion that Britain could be purged of an unwanted 95% of the population, if we only we embraced the ‘golden opportunity’ offered by recent extreme...

1
Wrenfoe 07.01.14 4:20pm
Dick Everyman
Wayne Rooney mourns loss of Portuguese great 'Subbuteo' 1
irreverendJ 07.01.14 4:09pm
Gerontius
Kim Jung Un ‘much taller than Dennis Rodman’ says WPK

A spokesman for the Eternal WPK has assured N.Koreans that Supreme Leader Kim Jung Un is a good 12 inches taller than basketball player Dennis Rodman and has scored considerably more ‘slam dunks’...

0
Gerontius 07.01.14 3:57pm
Gerontius