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Special relationship game WILL be decided on penalties, Obama tells voters 0
StoopyDeGunt 2 years

The special relationship game between America and its colony Britain will be decided on penalties, the US president has promised Fox News. President Obama will preside over the penalties, in...

Green denies dropping ball to win Newsbiscuit 'Twat of the Week' comp. 0
MADJEZ 2 years

More implausible theories soon...

Cow's arse hit by banjo. More soon. 1
red 2 years

See also: [url=http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2007/11/22/england-manager-loses-details-of-25-million-alternative-goalkeepers-252/]This[/url]...

'Oil leak no longer the worst spill in US-UK history' confirm Americans 0
edward hack 2 years

'That's one disaster that should never get capped in the future' say England supporters 'You English just don't get irony' respond Yanks after reading 'England held by USA' headlines...

Scots fans angered as STV show adverts during American goal 0
virtuallywill 2 years

HD shows you more...

Obama sticks two fingers up at Cameron during call without Mum seeing. 0
MADJEZ 2 years

Prime Minister David Cameron has called Barack Obama childish for making a two fingered gesture during their phone call about the BP crisis. Photos released today show the President slyly making the...

Catherine Zeta Jones & David Coulthard receive Birthday Honours for getting rich 3
virtuallywill 2 years

Tax exile later...

ITV apologises after advert is played during the wrong goal 0
TerribleTim 2 years
Capello rues missed chances: "We should have won by three clear adverts" 0
TerribleTim 2 years
Vuvuzela‎ frequency hypnotises you mental say scientists 0
Dun Dunkin 2 years

The natural resonant frequency is the B-flat above middle C. Long exposure to the vuvuzela‎ will turn your brain to scrambled eggs said Dr Wolf Vildeyeski expert on hypnosis. 'This increases the...

Obama mollified as BP's sponsorship deal with England squad proves helpful. 0
wallster 2 years

Can we rig it?...

England regret hiring Bruce Grobbelaar as goalkeeping coach. 0
MADJEZ 2 years

FA to investigate amid reports of strange betting patterns and a possible Pizza Hut ad offer for Robert Green...

BBC 'fesses up! 0
MTJR 2 years

The irritating noise in the background of the World Cup matches is NOT the sound of African football horns, but a swarm of angry bees accidently exported to South Africa when the BBC satalite truck...

National Lottery rollover now renamed 'Going Green' 0
Ostsee 2 years
ITV overwhelmed by sudden demand for HD coverage 0
edward hack 2 years

USA held by England...

Government denies that Sir Jock Stirrup is going because of silly name. 0
PluckyMunky 2 years
David Blunkett Standing by to be stand in England Goalkeeper 2
Mr.3374 2 years

More irritating buzzing soon...

Morgues worried about reviews as Egon Ronay visits anonymously. 1
MADJEZ 2 years
Little Chef confirms request to host Egon Ronay's funeral reception is tasteless 0
antharrison 2 years
Fitness regime be damned, I've got the body of a 15 year old, says Rose West 0
StoopyDeGunt 2 years
Robert Green's handling is the envy of the world says Alistair Campbell 0
StoopyDeGunt 2 years

England's unelected press secretary Alistair Campbell gave his first briefing to the world's sports writers last night, and immediately went on the attack against the allegations of mishandling and...

England keeper survives suicide attempt after bus slips under his body 0
gjp 2 years
English goalkeeeper blames slip on "Hand of Devil" 0
Dumbnews 2 years
BP confident that the Green glove technique will not cap spilling misteaks... 0
moonbeam 2 years

Obama will be chequing...

Cappello learns the difference between Robert and Robson the hard way 1
Mr.3374 2 years
US team confident of winning match in the Hollywood remake. 0
MADJEZ 2 years
Cameron sends gunboat to quell uppity colonials after embarrassing draw. 0
MADJEZ 2 years

The Prime Minister has dispatched a ship of the line to Maryland after todays shocking draw in the World Cup. It is hoped that the presence of the ship and it's company of Marines armed with the...

*Advert* Your old mobile phone could be worth NOTHING. Call now to find out how 0
deskpilot3 2 years

Is your mobile phone over 3 years old? Did you get it for free by saving tokens from a newspaper with a red masthead? Does it still have mechanical buttons that you actually have to click? Great...

Rooney fails Fifa pie test 0
puddle duck 2 years

Following the 1-1 draw with USA it can be revealled that Wanye Rooney has failed a mandorty Fifa pie test., Fifa officials became aroused when the England forward was seen to be moving about on the...

ITV HD viewers still waiting to see a goal.... 0
Mr.3374 2 years

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