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Celebrations on Tyneside as Geordies hit obesity targets 35 years early. 0
dominic_mcg 13.01.14 10:21pm
dominic_mcg
Scilly Season : Big money football coming to the islands ?

Following on from Gibraltar's admittance into UEFA, the topic of which island nation will next be granted a seat at European footballs top-table rages on - and the front runner, surprisingly, is the...

0
FlashArry 13.01.14 9:21pm
FlashArry
People urged 'don't feed migratory birds until they've been here for 3 months' 5
Plot126 13.01.14 8:45pm
Squudge
Majority of Britons will be dead by 2100

The Royal College of Physicians have reported that most of the people in Britain today are going to be dead by the end of the century...

2
apepper 13.01.14 8:44pm
Dick Everyman
My Local Council Kerbs keep tripping me up claims drug dealing father of 45

Brian O'Witty, an ex-Catholic Vicar with many smears on his record collection can only say the word "Bollox", In an Irish accent, he quotes "some prick always got to me condoms first Bee Jesus !"...

1
Tess Goes 13.01.14 8:14pm
Tess Goes
Julie Gayet to appear on Later with François Hollande 0
Smart Alex 13.01.14 7:55pm
Smart Alex
Francois Hollande pledges to take young mistress 'within days'

Incoming French President, Francois Hollande, has pledged to take a secret young mistress within days of gaining power. Speaking as he made his way to 'Bubbles Spa and Jacuzzi' on the Champs Elysees...

5
Mandy Lifeboat 13.01.14 7:10pm
Mandy Lifeboat
Beckham doesn't have two golden globes, his agent confirms 1
Not Amused 13.01.14 7:04pm
MADJEZ
Pensioner badly shaken after being shaken badly

An elderly local man was left traumatized yesterday after being inexpertly assaulted by a youth who proceeded to give his full name and address. Mr Robert Brennan, 82, was taking a walk to visit his...

3
Teenwolf 13.01.14 6:44pm
Dick Everyman
France to introduce post of First Mistress 0
Scronnyglonkle 13.01.14 6:17pm
Scronnyglonkle
Research finds people most happy online when complaining 0
Dumbnews 13.01.14 5:09pm
Dumbnews
British Talent Still Snubbed by Golden Globes

British Talent Still Snubbed by Golden Globes, The lights have been turned off, the red carpet rolled away and monologue jokes repeated around watercoolers and coffee machines, yet the Golden Globes...

0
james_doc 13.01.14 4:56pm
james_doc
This MUST have been written by one of us biscuits (crackers?)

[url=http://metro.co.uk/2014/01/12/philadelphia-police-searching-for-swiss-cheese-masturbator-4259690/]Philadelphia police searching for Swiss cheese sex pest[/url] This just has to be a hoax. I...

3
Son of Barnabas 13.01.14 4:42pm
Not Amused
In a moment of vanity, Bing googles itself. 0
Vulcanised Rubber 13.01.14 4:28pm
Vulcanised Rubber
Boy's arm trapped under partner's body for 7 hours in spooning setback

More to follow...

0
Vulcanised Rubber 13.01.14 4:24pm
Vulcanised Rubber
½ to be made cardinal

The fraction known as ½ is to made a cardinal. More to follow...

7
apepper 13.01.14 3:58pm
Titus
Global warming link to obesity and NHS crisis causes Radio 5 live calls meltdown 0
custard cream 13.01.14 3:26pm
custard cream
'No fanny flashes at this year's Golden Globes,' reports disgusted Mail reporter

More soon....

0
David K 13.01.14 3:16pm
David K
Francois Hollande in hospital suffering from exhaustion

French President Francois Hollande’s personal and political crisis deepened last night after he was rushed to hospital with symptoms of exhaustion. The Elysée Palace, in a statement last night,...

0
Vulcanised Rubber 13.01.14 2:07pm
Vulcanised Rubber
BMI for Obesity increased. UK now the least obese country in the world 0
Not Amused 13.01.14 12:03pm
Not Amused
12 years a Martian - the true story of Ed Milliband

http://img.thesun.co.uk/aidemitlum/archive/01706/MILI620_1706628a.jpg, 12 Years a Martian is a 2013 British-American epic historical drama film telling the true story of Ed Milliband's extraordinary...

2
Son of Barnabas 13.01.14 11:57am
Son of Barnabas
Partner of French politician suffers shock ‘at being shocked’ by his infidelity

France’s ‘first lady’ was rushed to hospital on Friday complaining of exhaustion, bad kama and an ironic sense déjà vu. Meanwhile President Francois Hollande shrugged off, in Gallic fashion,...

0
Wrenfoe 13.01.14 11:20am
Wrenfoe
No Trousers Day

Women and Scotsmen unsure what's so special about No Trousers Day http://www.demotix.com/news/3659680/london-no-trousers-day-2014-tube-ride#media-3659904...

0
ionb 13.01.14 9:37am
ionb
BMW added to list of spy agencies

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/10566150/Licence-to-speed.html The UK Government added the following to the list of agencies that are allowed to speed and break traffic laws: MI5 MI6 BMW...

0
ionb 13.01.14 9:35am
ionb
Australian fury as England insists "only women's results count" in Ashes

More to follow...

0
apepper 13.01.14 9:06am
apepper
After BRIC And MINT, Investment Advisors Suggest Chile, Uganda, Nepal and Tonga 3
Titus 13.01.14 8:36am
Dick Everyman
Tories Decide To Pander To People Who Are Most Likely To Vote

Following their realisation that in order to win the next general election, they need policies which have the support of those who are most likely to actually turn up at polling stations and vote,...

0
Titus 13.01.14 8:30am
Titus
Darts recruit even louder audience to distract how boring it is 0
David K 12.01.14 11:30pm
David K
1st Lady hospitalized with exhaustion now Hollande can't go out to see mistress.

No more soon she says...

0
MADJEZ 12.01.14 9:07pm
MADJEZ
CEO's Pride as Drug Rehab Business Expands

Bryan Michigan, 36, CEO of Narcotica, the nationwide network of drug rehabilitation and advisory centres, celebrated the first anniversary of his leadership by announcing plans to open 26 new...

0
Teenwolf 12.01.14 7:09pm
Teenwolf