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Sir Chris Hoy announces retirement from advertising Shredded Wheat 0
simonjmr 18.04.13 12:50pm
Helen Flanagan's side tit on display outside restaurant. And now the weather... 0
ginty 18.04.13 11:29am
Oh hell, now we've got to do some work and find other stories cry reporters. 0
Ian Searle 18.04.13 10:55am
Ian Searle
Obama letter actually laced with ricin peas

More soon Bit racist, this. Hey ho, racism never hurt anyone...

Qoxiivi 18.04.13 9:29am
Women’s Institute reject Obama plans to restrict access to pressure cookers 0
medici2471 18.04.13 8:57am
Nathan is unWanted 0
John Wiltshire 18.04.13 7:54am
John Wiltshire
All Coal Mines Suddenly, Magically Become Viable Again After PM's Recent Death 0
Titus 18.04.13 6:41am
An Autobiography In Dance Form: "I Did It Psy Way" 0
Titus 18.04.13 6:37am
Wales consolidates its presence in the Premiersheep.

I'm Welsh, I'm allowed...

sredni vashta 18.04.13 5:30am
Onion stall outside St Paul's reports record takings 1
sydalg 18.04.13 5:28am
Real tears for Osbourne as he realises he will now be the most hated figure in 0
burnmybridges 18.04.13 2:17am
Dead children the price you pay for freedom

Brave US Senators were today praised for blocking a bill that would have prevented guns from ending up in the wrong hands but created mild inconvenience for sane gun users, which is of course...

Hooch 18.04.13 12:02am
Our £10m goes up in smoke, but at least the crematorium is coal-fired. 2
pinxit 17.04.13 10:22pm
FBI investigates after Obama receives Chinese takeaway with rice in. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 17.04.13 10:08pm
Death of Thatcher leaves field open to new Tory bastards

The death of Baroness Thatcher has opened up new possibilities for leading Tory bastards, say political analysts. 'While Thatcher was still around,' said a seasoned Tory commentator, 'Tory...

roybland 17.04.13 9:21pm
Al-Qaeda declare fat-war on skinny marathon runners 0
LensCap 17.04.13 8:10pm
Joy Division Musical Hailed A Triumphant Failure

Torn Apart, the new musical based upon the songs of Mancunian arch-miserablists Joy Division, has been hailed a triumphant failure by its creators. The show has opened to scathing reviews and abysmal...

sredni vashta 17.04.13 8:08pm
sredni vashta
Carol Thatcher uses TV appearance to reiterate her claim to be a celebrity. 0
MADJEZ 17.04.13 7:36pm
Thatcher took away our livelihood protest, African mercenaries.

'He just had to rent some bloody helicopters'...

MADJEZ 17.04.13 7:34pm
"Name's not down" - rebuff for Thatcher at Pearly Gates 0
Drylaw 17.04.13 7:30pm
IRA 'disappointed' not to be granted the opportunity to scatter Thatcher's ashes

A spokesman from the Provisional IRA today expressed his deep regret that the Coalition government had chosen to rudely ignore their offer to assist in the dispersment of Baroness Thatcher's ashes...

sponge finger 17.04.13 7:28pm
Grieving Hughes family sees the ‘funny side’ of funerals...

Barry Hughes was unlucky to be in involved in a fatal collision with a bakery truck last week. His lifeless body had to be prized out of the lorry’s bakery grill with a crowbar, much to his...

Tripod 17.04.13 7:12pm
Dismay as anti-Thatcher protestors realise that they're still unemployable.

More benefits soon...

sigmund 17.04.13 6:53pm
The All New Jeni B
White House bound Uncle Ben's consignment intercepted, as may have 'rice in' 1
AdrianJ 17.04.13 6:41pm
custard cream
Report finds Swansea MMR injections do not treat 'Welshness' 0
custard cream 17.04.13 6:38pm
custard cream
Is it just me, or are the corpses getting younger, Prince Philip wonders 3
sydalg 17.04.13 6:23pm
Al OPecia
Chancellor now understands 'why we cry'.

Scientists today expressed excitement that the pioneering android Chancellor, Gideon11, may have experienced something equatable with human emotion. The waxen-faced facsimile of a humanoid was...

Darkbill 2.0 17.04.13 6:12pm
Thatcher family "slowly recovering" from Prince Philip's condolences 0
sydalg 17.04.13 5:45pm
David Mellor comforted after failing to to pull at Thatcher funeral 0
sydalg 17.04.13 5:40pm
Life without Thatcher "worse than heroin withdrawal" say veteran protesters 0
sydalg 17.04.13 5:30pm