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ASDA rebrand 'Smart Price' after customers realise it 'Tastes Like Shit' 0
Perks 3 years

Following on from the announcement by Sainsbury’s that they are changing the name of their tiger bread to ‘giraffe bread’ after receiving a letter from a 3 year old saying the pattern looked...

Tories rebranded as 'Posh Twits' following letter from girl, 3 2
kga6 3 years

A letter to the Government from a 3 year old girl has been circulating the internet with such speed and support that David Cameron has agreed to rename his party 'The Posh Twits'. The circulating...

Engineers stumble upon low carbon-foot print green car, the Used car 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Cockney Pilots scare air passengers 4
Marko 3 years

A recent survey has found that when on an airplane, passengers are more relaxed whilst coming in to land when the pilot has a 'posh' accent, as opposed to a regional twang., Cockney pilots top the...

Low-cost airline to refuel in local petrol stations 0
markbuontempo 3 years

Due to another increase of airport fuel duties, renowned low-cost airline O'Really!Air today announced their decision to use specially adapted petrol stations to refuel their fleet of aircraft. CEO...

Man receives useful email 3
antharrison 3 years

A Manchester man was today said to be "Stunned" after receiving an email which asked him to attend a business meeting in March. "It wasn't even from Groupon, Woucher, TripAdvisor, eBay, Amazon, an...

Canine-friendly golf club remote car park is awarded AAA dogging status 0
antharrison 3 years

The management committee at Heston Moor Golf Club in Birmingham is said to be delighted at the award of AAA status by the British Dogging Association. "As a long-established golf club with a keen...

Fred Goodwin: "My ears will be cold in bed" shock horror 0
Scroat 3 years
British Tourists denied entry into the U.S. Due to Tweet 0
Couriernew 3 years

Two British tourists were recently denied entry into the U.S. because one of them had tweeted that he planned to "destroy" America-- a word he defended as slang for partying hard. In a related...

Fred Goodwin : Worse than Hitler say Daily Mail. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
Public calls for Goodwin to be stripped of manhood 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Queen strips bank of R to leave just BS 0
medici2471 3 years
Fred Goodwin loses knighthood - "I'm sure I put it down somewhere" 0
apepper 3 years

Disgraced banker, Fred Goodwin, has caused chaos by announcing that he can no longer find his knighthood. "It's disappeared somewhere, and now there someone at the door who wants it back again."...

Nodding off can kill, warns NHS. 3
TheBull 3 years

During the Gary Speed inquest, the coroner said; "It was possible Speed could have "nodded off" while sitting with cable round his neck on the stairs in his garage". NHS spokesman, John...

Cave to rent - secluded, ideal get away - suddenly available due to bereavement. 1
Ian Searle 3 years
Only sex sells moans Glaswegian rent boy in overcrowded prison 0
Marko 3 years
Hecklers barrack Obama at US Presidential rally 0
Marko 3 years
What Queen actually needs is a stiff drink, clarifies Palace 2
The Paper Ostrich 3 years

Buckingham Palace has angrily rejected claims by Prince Harry that the Queen 'needs Prince Philip at her side' in order to carry out her duties, by insisting that what she actually needs is 'a stiff...

Clegg rouses Lib Dems with pledge to make Moon Britain's 136th unitary authority 0
The Paper Ostrich 3 years

Nick Clegg has announced ambitious plans to create a British Moonbase by the end of the next parliament, rallying Liberal Democrat voters with a stirring pledge to make the Moon ‘Britain’s 136th...

Flashmob breaks Guiness record for multiple indecent exposure arrests 7
nickb 3 years

Two great brand names, Guiness and Flash came together yesterday to break a world record for the greatest number of indecent exposures in one place. “I thought multiple exposure was strictly...

New Channel 5 gameshow, No-Win, No-Fee, set to start this weekend 0
Iamthestig 3 years

After a few teething troubles and legal wrangles, channel 5's new flagship Saturday night gameshow, "No-Win, No-Fee" is set to hit our screens. The hour long show, sees 4 contestants go head-to-head...

The Gulag Diet 0
TheBull 3 years

The Russian Government, keen to find new ways to attract foreign tourists, have announced the founding of "The Gulag Diet" Visitors will be offered a 6 month "Working Holiday" in one of Stalin's...

Steel chain manufacturer in Sheffield claims to have found the missing link 1
Marko 3 years
Yell.com to finalize plans for all search results to be 100% random 4
Shandy 3 years

Yell.com released news that all their search results from now on will be totally random, leaving users with a very small chance of being linked to something they're looking for. "It may match up, it...

Man upset that cafe advertising "Anytime Breakfast"... 1
Smart Alex 3 years

won't sell him toast and marmalade in the middle ages...

England Cricketers told to think outside the box 0
apepper 3 years

More puns to follow...

Skeptic returns from posture clinic and admits 'I stand corrected' 0
kga6 3 years
David Milliband made labour leader on transfer window deadline day 0
Perks 3 years
Clegg anxious as end of his work experience placement approaches 0
cinquecento 3 years
Kate Winslet’s neighbours in fear of being unable to get flood insurance 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years