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Venus finally finds self after rare trek across the sun 1
simonjmr 3 years
Queen in rift with Barlow as Coldplay tickets get a last minute ditch. 3
JohnSmith 3 years

The Queen's Jubilee Reporting Committee has gotten hold of material showing Her Majesty in a heated confrontation with Gary Barlow, the man put in charge of organising the entire shambles of a...

Unpopular co-worker grateful for LinkedIn invite from Russian hackers 0
Mandy Lifeboat 3 years
Gloria Mundy misses last Venus Transit due to Norovirus infection 3
Nails UK 3 years
Author Ray Bradbury to be cremated at temperature of Fahrenheit 451 2
V Riddoch 3 years
Austrian town of Fucking in twinning talks with German village of Blöjöb 2
Alan Sundry 3 years
Government can't cut childcare bureaucracy as not allowed scissors, say experts. 2
V Riddoch 3 years

More later...

Author Ray Bradbury to be cremated at temperature of Fahrenheit 451 2
V Riddoch 3 years
Queen ‘comes out’ as dyslexic after igniting Deacon in error 6
dvo4fun 3 years

Buckingham and Lambeth Palaces have presented a united front over the near-immolation of Stephen Wallace, the chubby Deacon of St Paul's Cathedral, at the Jubilee Concert yesterday. The Queen...

Following Transit across the sun, NASA gets Toyota Hi Ace for Mars mission. 0
Maverick 3 years
Daily Mail Jibe Sees Fry Set To Quit Twitter Yet Again 0
Duff 3 years

Racist homophobes' newspaper of choice, The Daily Mail, is at the centre of yet more Twitter outrage today, after it suggested in an article that the uncrowned King of the microblogging site, Stephen...

BBC to broadcast a day of 'gobshite' 0
roybland 3 years

The BBC's decision to broadcast James Joyce's Ulysees on Radio 4 throughout the day on 16 June has been denounced by listeners. 'Ulysees is recognized as a seminal work,' said a BBC spokesman. 'A...

Cliff put to death after slapping arse in front of monarch 0
Old Hat 3 years

Sir Cliff Richard has been taken to the gallows on Tyburn Hill and hung by the neck until dead, after slapping his arse in from of her majesty queen Elizabeth II. In a rousing display of musical...

Williams family rallies round after Venus in Transit incident 0
cinquecento 3 years
Hologram of Duke to insult guests at Jubilee lunch, says Palace. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
White Van Man Strikes Again In Transit On The Sun Sensation 0
Duff 3 years

Amateur stargazers and top astronomers alike are said to be amazed following a sensational once in a lifetime occurrence earlier today, when reports started to surface from the world's top monitoring...

Grandma (86) was refused a day off work to visit husband (90) in hospital 0
Mark66 3 years
"Britain's Most Psychedelic Chef" Coming To TV Soon 1
Textbook 3 years

A new spin on the popular reality cooking show is set to debut this season as Britain's Most Psychedelic Chef hits the air. Competitors will be expected to prepare a wide range of gourmet cuisine to...

BBC hits back at Baker and Raworth ‘cheap labour’ commentary allegations 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Non-techies in awe as IPv6 launches despite bad weather 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Miliband considers austerity re-branding as Cheap Labour 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Olympic torch hand-cuffed to Dublin lamp post by British stag party 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Disappointment for ISS astronauts - "You weren't in" claims Royal Mail. 1
Boutros 3 years

Astronauts were bitterly disappointed to find a card on their mat indicating that the first Royal Mail delivery to the International Space Station had been aborted. The parcels of gifts from...

Industrial action on the cards after al-Qaeda votes for strike 0
simonjmr 3 years
BBC to air Philip's infection's transit of his penis 0
simonjmr 3 years
Greek and Spanish bond yields spike on news of Nigerian email withdrawal 0
Yikes 3 years

The financial crisis in Europe deepened on news that the Nigerian Email Co-op was ceasing operations in Greece and Spain. Markets were spooked as prevalence of scam emails is seen as a crucial...

The LA Mayoral purse taken for a ride 3
Kazytc 3 years

Mayor Albert Yen-Gang, who is Mayor of San Grabbit, in Los Angeles, appears to have fallen upon 'hard' times.. Having escaped from the City Hall car park, in the Mayoral Limousine, after giving his...

In-Jokes Have No Place In News Media, Says You-Know-Who 0
Textbook 3 years
Internet Now With "Auto-Adolf" Comparison Feature 4
Textbook 3 years

It has long been a rule of any political debate, that if it goes on long enough, one party will compare the other to Adolf Hitler, and the party that makes this comparison instantly loses the debate....

Football refs' smelling salts franchise to end soon...... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

due to clamp down on pitch swearing., Rugby League to follow?...