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Earl Spencer to give address at Royal Wedding - 'I hate you all!' 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

It has been revealed that Earl Spencer has sensationally been chosen to give the address at the wedding of William and Kate., Documents leaked today show that the royal couple had thought they were...

Barhain seeks death of tinpot dictators - bernie ecclestone cancels GP 1
wolfie 3 years

Pint sized pocket napoleon of pointless car racing and petrol-headed pirelli-smelling pimp of pretty twice-his-size gold diggers, bernie "how the hell did he get to be in charge" ecclestone, has...

Why flattery gets you nowhere. 20
malgor 3 years

It's short for flat battery. More concatenated nouns soon...

Downing Street denies coalition cabinet is turning into "Alice in Wonderland" 0
simonjmr 3 years

Senior Government Officials have today strenously denied that David Cameron has been using Lewis Carroll's novels as the basis for cabinet appointments. Civil Servants have for some time have...

Entertainment News: 1
wallster 3 years

On the 30th Anniversary of the first recorded telling of the joke about Chris Rea and Dire Straits collaborating on a single to be released under the name of Dire Rea; meat wearing queen of pop Lady...

Couple divorce after dating site fail to identify them as a match 3
cuckoowatoo 3 years

It is reported that Mr and Mrs Richards had seen the television campaign for the dating site E-Harmony. The adverts claim that a scientific approach using 29 dimensions is adopted to determine...

Reckless idiot condemned for trying to make TV documentary without a celebrity 6
ronseal 3 years

A TV production company that tried to make a factual documentary without a celebrity presenter was rescued yesterday, saving them from almost certain oblivion. It took Christopher Biggins and Leslie...

Gerry Adams says his election campaign 'is a blast'. 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

Gerry Adams today said that his campaign in the Northern Ireland elections 'is a real blast.', 'I don't think it's going to bomb,' he said confidentally. 'It's firing on all cylinders, and in the...

Secret service say '7/7 wasn't our fault - we were too incompetent to stop it.' 0
John Wiltshire 3 years

The head of the British secret services, known only as Sir Basil Harrington of Mews Place, Haslemere, Surrey GU17 4BQ, has angrily denied they were in any way responsible for 7/7 (or any other...

For better or verse, Totnes drinkers look forward to a poetry-free pint... 4
Doylem 3 years

Frank Fielding’s dreary poems have divided opinions in Totnes, a place where a man with a cravat, floppy hair, a strange, plonking voice and a notebook full of doggerel can feel at home. Some...

Instead of a knighthood Bruce Forsyth settles for marrying the Queen 1
yamashow 3 years
Ozzies recognize a national fugitive in Lake Windemere: The Bunyip 0
Hunter F. Thompson 3 years

The Bunyip is now thought to be the leader of Al Qaeda, clearly [i]en route[/i] for Scotland.more soon, as extradition requests proliferate...

New dating site makes it easier to find lots of people not interested in you 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Protestors demand Gaddafi improve his image with new sunglasses 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Gandalf steps down in protest misunderstanding. More soon. 0
malgor 3 years
Bill Gates tweats, "We must defeat Apple! ... Sent from my iPad" 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Gadaff-ugout chant Libyan protesters. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
wacky races start with army surplus special 2
4ty2 3 years

http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20091115210761/uncyclopedia/images/d/dd/ArmySurplusSpecialAni.gif http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/51344000/jpg/_51344663_bahraintanksreuters466.jpg...

9/11 Actually 11/9, 7/7 Unaffected 1
3 years
Cameron Confirms That 'Big Society' Relaunch A Flop..... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

.As he jumps to his next gimmick - checking out the sand in Egypt for George Wimpey., Yippee!...

Mouse to move in with Deputy PM 0
JamieTea 3 years

http://i1115.photobucket.com/albums/k550/JamieTea/Random%20Pix/mouseandcleggcopy.jpg, The Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg has announced his decision to adopt a stray mouse, which has been causing...

50 Year Old Blokes Concede the Dwarf on Singing Ringing Tree 1
3 years

Used to "scare the beejazus" out of them. Speaking from behind his sofa, Jeremy "X" was annoyed that it had now popped up on Youtube, opening old wounds. "There was a weird big fish and a bear too"...

Glenn Hoddle first choice star in Subo biopic. 0
Ian Searle 3 years

Failing that Glen Ford, Glen Campbell or Glen Fiddich...

Lady Gaga following a whiskey only "drunk diet", she's already lost three days. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Libyan protestors are advised if they see Gadaffi, duck. 4
yamashow 3 years
‘The King’s Speech’ – 'too much killing and not enough gags' say L.A. critics 3
Gerontius 3 years

Despite being nominated for 15 BAFTAS and destined for success at the Oscars ‘The Kings Speech’ has been condemned by some film critics for over-glorifying violence and promoting race hatred.,...

Mouth of Hell to Open in Central London.... Maw soon 0
AndyOverhead 3 years
Robin Williams playing Mrs Doubtfire to play Susan Boyle in new biopic... 0
Doylem 3 years
BBC statement on claims that Real Hustle was faked was a fake, it was claimed. 0
Tammy Flugh 3 years
Well duh, BBC tells viewers conned by show about conmen 2
Darkbill 2.0 3 years

The BBC today responded to allegations that The Real Hustle a show about conmen had attempted to fool viewers by using actors instead of members of the public. Dawn Garnet, BBC 3 Head of Light...