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Paterson admits well maintained badger setts "very efficient drainage channels". 0
Ref Minor 09.02.14 12:36pm
Ref Minor
Huhne: 'I'll solve the flood problem with my experience of fingers in dykes' 0
topfotogmw 09.02.14 12:34pm
topfotogmw
Gary Barlow to play ‘boring’ Ken Barlow’s ‘boring’ love child in new Coronation

“It’s a-b-s-o-l-u-t-e-l-y fantastic news” said Gary with his usual slow-motion northern delivery “the producers said I’m so good I don’t even need to take acting lessons, so Take That you...

0
farmer giles 09.02.14 12:17pm
farmer giles
Salmond demands Independant Scotland retain England Rugby Team. More soon. 3
Al OPecia 09.02.14 12:07pm
Al OPecia
HS2 to be replaced by Russian run winter Olympics to save money 0
Bigglesworth 09.02.14 11:48am
Bigglesworth
London Boroughs placed on amber alert

The London Boroughs of Kensington and Chelsea have been issued with an amber flood alert after a puddle was spotted forming on a patch of grass outside Kensington Palace Gardens., The puddle, which...

0
Gerontius 09.02.14 10:54am
Gerontius
Environment Agency claims it's not all bad news. All the badgers have drowned 7
grumblechops 09.02.14 10:53am
Sinnick
Studies of prison dance classes prove guilty feet DO have rhythm.

Ironically many of the inmates are there because of careless whispers...

0
Ian Searle 09.02.14 10:42am
Ian Searle
Marjoram revealed to be Oregano on the Witness Protection Scheme.

Damn! Just blew it's cover!...

0
Ian Searle 09.02.14 10:41am
Ian Searle
Eastwood saves man from choking by turning off his latest film

But he was unsure whether the man "Choked six times, or only five". Some sources are putting the lapse down to the general atmosphere of excitement...

0
Bigglesworth 09.02.14 10:21am
Bigglesworth
BP: Proud sponsors of the Sochi Olympics

Anyone seen the BP logo? :-)...

0
ionb 09.02.14 8:16am
ionb
Viewers shocked by Olympian who overcame no demons 0
Dumbnews 09.02.14 2:35am
Dumbnews
Internet porn users suffer from premature e-jaculation 0
sydalg 09.02.14 12:00am
sydalg
Survey finds most barbarians would skip civilisation, go straight to decadence 0
sydalg 08.02.14 11:58pm
sydalg
Putin assured 'backside rodeo' is not a euphemism during snowboarding. 0
MADJEZ 08.02.14 11:24pm
MADJEZ
Taxpayers 'not all hardworking' shock

A disquieting new study into the behaviour of so-called 'hardworking' taxpayers has found that some taxpayers are actually a bit lazy sometimes, especially within the workplace. Researchers from the...

0
Electrelane 08.02.14 10:58pm
Electrelane
Cameron told 'hard to get' is best tactic for Scotland

Relationship counsellors everywhere have been shaking their heads knowingly after the Prime Minister's latest impassioned entreaty to Scotland. Tamsin Potter from Relate advised, 'He won't get...

3
Kevin the Swan 08.02.14 10:29pm
sponge finger
Think tank ponders Cameron's rug enigma

Since the Prime Minister David Cameron stated: 'if we lost Scotland, it would rip a rug from under the UK's reputation', Scottish and English philosopers and linguistic scholars alike have been in a...

3
Squudge 08.02.14 10:27pm
sponge finger
New Tory immigration minister James Brokenshire. Broken-Shire. No. Really.

Statement from new Home Office Minister Giles Buggered-Country expected soon. Ed Balls retires to his office with team of gag-writers and relieved expression. More at 1. Yuk yuk fucking yuk...

0
blokefromstoke 08.02.14 10:16pm
blokefromstoke
Environment agency admits that most Somerset people can't spell environment 0
Underconstruction 08.02.14 9:31pm
Underconstruction
Urgent COBRA meeting calls urgent COBRA meeting 0
roybland 08.02.14 8:27pm
roybland
Locals petition Coca-Cola to open Somerset bottling plant 0
Bigglesworth 08.02.14 7:39pm
Bigglesworth
Come Dine With Me "FGM" themed evening a step too far 0
Bigglesworth 08.02.14 7:08pm
Bigglesworth
Clare Balding changes her name to Gaye Lobby

“This sounds like a very silly idea to me.” said Vladimir Putin, who denies he is a descendant of Ras Putin “The headline ‘Gay Lobby attacks Gaye Lobby’ or vice versa could confuse some...

0
farmer giles 08.02.14 6:43pm
farmer giles
Pervy Plebs push porn. 0
godly1966 08.02.14 4:48pm
godly1966
Coogan spots Pope on other side of St Peter's Square "Frank!...Frank!....FRANK!"

More Papal Bull at 1...

2
blokefromstoke 08.02.14 4:44pm
virtuallywill
Downing St officers caught watching 2 Parties 1 Cock-up

More soon....

0
David K 08.02.14 3:37pm
David K
Cameron blames Dawlish railway collapse on "Brunel's bodge job" 0
Bigglesworth 08.02.14 3:29pm
Bigglesworth
God sues newspapers after claims of "Biblical weather"

More to follow...

0
apepper 08.02.14 2:51pm
apepper
Mild winter leaves old folk with nothing to go on about

The mild winter has deprived many older people of anything to go on and on about says Age UK. 'Without low temperatures,' said an Age UK spokeswoman, 'the main moans of the winter months - how they...

0
roybland 08.02.14 2:00pm
roybland