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Salmond: Independent Scotland would have Super-strength Cobra Committee 0
Underconstruction 12.02.14 8:05pm
Michael Fish declares 2014 "driest year since records began".

Never forget...

Adrian Bamforth 12.02.14 8:00pm
Adrian Bamforth
Staines, renamed in 2012 to Staines upon Thames, is renamed Staines under Thames 0
Not Amused 12.02.14 7:30pm
Not Amused
100 mph winds and floods an "almost unparalleled opportunity for hyperbole". 0
Al OPecia 12.02.14 7:27pm
Al OPecia
Fossilised sandbag uncovered at believed 'Atlantis' site 0
Underconstruction 12.02.14 7:20pm
"I am not to blame for tree falling" Insists the wind. 0
carlosmanwelly 12.02.14 7:16pm
Opening Thames barrier could lead to disappearance of stubborn Staines 0
Underconstruction 12.02.14 7:16pm
Makers of 'Pledge' launch 'Dredge' 0
Underconstruction 12.02.14 7:14pm
Husband killed by wife after lighting Yankee candles during power cut.

A woman killed her husband after a furious row about him lighting the Yankee candles during a power cut. Carol Rees was “upset and furious” that husband, Tony Rees lit the expensive candles...

carlosmanwelly 12.02.14 7:06pm
Environment Agency orders surplus stocks of boil plasters. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 12.02.14 6:59pm
Al OPecia
Hosepipe ban lifted. 0
Maverick 12.02.14 6:52pm
Pickles to save Somerset with sacks full of humbug. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 12.02.14 6:51pm
Al OPecia
Cute kitten video posted on Youtube fails to become viral hit.

The video entitled “Cute kitten plays with ball of wool” has only been viewed 17 times since it was uploaded to Youtube over a year ago. In the video uploaded by Marion Hopkins, the cute tabby...

carlosmanwelly 12.02.14 6:40pm
Prince Charles- "Endless reign is so depressing"

"We are not amused" says Queen...

GingerClive 12.02.14 6:38pm
readers questions : does Bird flu swim?

asks Somerset Broilers Club...

Robert Koch 12.02.14 6:24pm
Robert Koch
In Holyhead, Hoylake and Heysham hurricanes have happened

.I'm looking at my roof tile as I write...

Scronnyglonkle 12.02.14 6:05pm
Troops sent back to Middle East as UK runs out of sand

British troops are on standby to re-invade Middle East countries if Tory heartland runs out of sandbags warns PM., Plans to invade Afghanistan and Iraq are being drawn up by MOD, bulldozers used to...

Gerontius 12.02.14 5:53pm
64'000 homes are without power in Wales, 500 more than normal. 0
Bigglesworth 12.02.14 5:52pm
Shock scientific discovery.

A ten year study by Oxford University has confirmed the shock news that rivers do actually flood into flood plains. The National house building federation said that these "were vicious rumours spread...

Bismarck 12.02.14 4:55pm
Glastonbury 2014 line up announced.

Wet Wet Wet., Mud., The Beach Boys., Katrina and the waves., Flock of Seagulls., The Waterboys., more soon...

Zen 12.02.14 4:38pm
Midfield Diamond
Labour to inter remains of Denis Howell to appease rain gods

Back in 1976, he was the known as the Minister for Drought...

custard cream 12.02.14 3:07pm
Midfield Diamond
World Cup Mascots close to extinction

As the Brazilian Government agrees to fund the conservation of their three-banded armadillo, Fuleco, environmentalists have warned that previous mascots may have already died out. Evidence has...

Wrenfoe 12.02.14 2:57pm
Man sues supermarket over lack of lifeguards in car park. 0
GingerClive 12.02.14 2:56pm
Cameron announces flood response from 10 Drowning Street. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 12.02.14 2:37pm
Al OPecia
B&Q Launch New Range Of DIY Ark Kits

Scope for a more elaborate story here I think. Possibly relating to ark-tic weather? New homes to be designed by ark-itects? (Loved Matt's recent cartoon, by the way - pairs of animals boarding...

Titus 12.02.14 2:18pm
Somali Pirates Battle with Cannibal Rats In Thames Valley

[Hat tip to pinxit]...

Titus 12.02.14 2:13pm
Breaking Wind Alert: Red in Some Lower Areas and Spreading

That's bloody uncomfortable...

BewsNiscuit 12.02.14 2:04pm
Taliban Chief Accepts British Surrender

The British forces today followed government orders and staged a tactical withdrawal from Afghanistan. Speaking from Downing Street the PM stated that it was that or reintroducing conscription...

Ian Collier 12.02.14 1:46pm
Cameron: "Not that money. That money was for a rainy day... Oh ... bollocks" 0
Not Amused 12.02.14 1:19pm
Not Amused
Sanjeev Bhaskar to host Bhangra Relief to aid Berkshire flood victims 0
custard cream 12.02.14 1:16pm
custard cream