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CERN scientists forgot to carry the one 1
tomholder 3 years

Evidence of faster-than light particles was quashed today when it was discovered that the lead scientist, Dr. Osborne, forgot to carry the one on the calculations.Cern released a statement today...

Gypsy woman puts curse on people who stereotype gypsies 10
paddyparkinson 3 years

A local gypsy has cursed the makers of Channel 4 program “My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding”. The woman, who insists on not being named due to legal reasons, has stated that the program demeans and...

Depressed frog kermits suicide. More soon. 5
Haywood Manley 3 years

Got to get these off my chest. I have more...

Strait of Hormuz admits to 'having doubts' 2
Ian Searle 3 years
New chainsaw safety course could cost 'an arm and a leg'. 0
writinginbsl 3 years
Recently discovered Victorian wig weaving machine is important heirloom 5
Haywood Manley 3 years
Tributaries continue to pour in for River Phoenix 1
Gourd Almighty 3 years
Faster-than-light Nissan Micra ‘may have been down to timing fault’ 11
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Two friends from Romford, who last year claimed to have exceeded the speed of light in a modified Nissan Micra, have admitted that the surprise result may have been caused by ‘Dave forgetting to...

Italian Plumbing Firm Draws Record Numbers Of Complaints 0
Textbook 3 years

A plumbing firm run by a pair of Italian brothers has seen virtually all of its customers contacting consumer protection services. Albert Brekky has a typical story. "They turned up to unblock my...

Straits of Gibraltar deny homophobia allegations. 3
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

More soon. Hat tip to Ian Searle...

Department of Health inquiry as Cameron seeks advice on aborting Andrew Lansley 0
Mandy Lifeboat 3 years
'Sorry, we thought she was a Somali pirate' say Syrians. 3
Dickens or Shakespeare 3 years
Press Divided on Gillard/Rudd Power Struggle 1
Textbook 3 years

Australian media is divided over who to support in the brewing struggle between prime minister Julia Gillard and Kevin Rudd, the man she ousted but who is widely believed to be plotting a comeback....

Long term unemployed man 'lifted' by his new crane operator job 0
Perks 3 years

Long term unemployed father of three, John Small, has been talking about his joy at finding the perfect job. Mr Small has been employed by a construction firm as a 'tower crane operator'. This is the...

Snob attacks 'snobby' attacks on snobs 0
Mandy Lifeboat 3 years
America apologises to President Kharzai for burning Afghanistan 0
Mandy Lifeboat 3 years
Scientists discover first non-psychiatric patient who finds Noel Fielding funny 0
JohnA 3 years

Definitely a Nobel Prize for that...

Clapitoil Secretcorns ... Political Correctness gone mad ? 8
Gourd Almighty 3 years

.. Edited on the advice of a wiser head than mine...

A million ex-private sector pensioners to have houses frozen for another year 2
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Somalis claim they have 'no choice' but to take part in Talk Like a Pirate Day 4
Haywood Manley 3 years
Vicar loses Sunday working case 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Tributes continue to pour in for Whitney Houston... 0
quango 3 years

"She made Amy Winehouse look like a pussy", muses one fan, a 13 year girl from New Jersey. More soon...

Too many blockbuster remakes "stiffling" originality in porn films 7
simonjmr 3 years

The 2012 Awards season will climax in six weeks time when the Porn Industry OscHards are awarded, but an industry insider and Executive Producer for many adult movies, claims that remakes of...

Greece offers to bail out RBS 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Porn industry’s embarrassing association with Richard Branson finally ended 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Redhead Virgin playboy wins rights to domain name 0
Qoxiivi 3 years
Flat-screen television sets ‘destroying our natural habitat’, claim poltergeists 10
Gary Stanton 3 years

People intending to purchase a modern flat screen television or fancy new plasma screen should take a long hard look at themselves if they care in the slightest about having their family terrorised...

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to apply for academy status. 1
Ian Searle 3 years
Adele angry at TV Biz "suits" for interrupting her list of Music Biz "suits" 2
bonjonelson 3 years
Manchester City face complaint over 'You're not incredible' chants 0
HenryMJUK 3 years

Manchester City face complaint over 'You're not incredible' chants aimed at Porto striker Hulk I'm a massive fan of Lou Ferrigno and I love Kermit - to say they are my role models is an...