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Miliband says Labour will lower the voting age & freeze the price of ice cream.

And sweet shops will be forced to sell Fruit Salads and Blackjacks at 4 for a penny, just like the old days...

0
deskpilot3 24.09.13 10:19pm
deskpilot3
Voters still not convinced Ed Miliband would make good President of the USA 0
roybland 24.09.13 9:44pm
roybland
Ed Miliband copied MY speech - says scriptwriter for PPI sales call centre 0
ronseal 24.09.13 9:34pm
ronseal
Benedict vs Atheist in WWE SmackDown

Francis to hold his coat...

0
Coco 24.09.13 8:50pm
Coco
Shamed snooker player Stephen Lee to play future matches blindfolded 1
custard cream 24.09.13 8:38pm
AReader
Keith Lemon’s agent denies Stephen Fry is lined up for Celebrity Juice

We might line him up, but he’ll probably get stage fright, what with his bi-polar and that. We won’t make him look any more stupid than he already is, don’t worry. Maybe if we get his...

0
farmer giles 24.09.13 8:34pm
farmer giles
Tian Tian contacts Chengdu Panda Breeding Centre in last minute adoption bid

Effort to save face http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-24223721...

0
Coco 24.09.13 8:33pm
Coco
Woman who rowed for 150 days across the pacific finally won the argument 0
Not Amused 24.09.13 8:08pm
Not Amused
Miliband vows to cut Miliband at Next Election

In an unexpectedly violent move, Ed Miliband has vowed to silence critics once and for all by guaranteeing, during the election run-up, a knife fight with his brother ‘to the death’. Mr (Ed)...

2
SimonJJames 24.09.13 8:04pm
Robopop
Iain Duncan Smith 'will wash the feet of the poor'

Iain Duncan Smith will wash the feet of the poor as an act of contrition and repentance for the bedroom tax, according to Catholic commentators. The Work and Pensions Secretary, who is a Catholic,...

0
roybland 24.09.13 7:19pm
roybland
World’s oldest gnat dies of gnatural causes

Doctors originally thought it was a killer brain bug attack. Most gnats bite or annoy humans. Midges are also sometimes called gnats. In North America the name is also applied to the blackfly, fruit...

1
farmer giles 24.09.13 7:04pm
Al OPecia
Disaffected youth says "I can't be bothered, ennuit?" 5
Al OPecia 24.09.13 6:48pm
Al OPecia
Test smoke alarms by pressing button, not by lighting a fire, says fire chief. 0
Boutros 24.09.13 6:36pm
Boutros
Miliband pledges to freeze polar ice caps 0
farmer giles 24.09.13 6:24pm
farmer giles
Car does 20 miles in 52 years; minicab driver blames "roadworks"

A minicab driver who received a telegram in 1961 requesting carriage to Croydon airport to catch a BOAC flight to Paris, has sent a runner to the customer's house to say he'll be there in 5 minutes...

2
apepper 24.09.13 5:59pm
apepper
Miliband fails to state Labour plastic shopping bags policy in conference speech

Accused by Nick Clegg of ‘dodging the big issues’. Meanwhile, Lidl bought out Tesco today and introduced the new slogan ‘Every Lidl Helps’...

0
farmer giles 24.09.13 5:13pm
farmer giles
Apple Confirm “Siri” Will Be Voiced By Steve Jobs From The Afterlife

The technology world was rocked today when Apple announced that it had secured Steve Jobs to provide “Siri” answers from beyond the grave. In an unprecedented move the Cupertino giant said,...

1
SimonJJames 24.09.13 4:44pm
custard cream
Miliband pledges to arrest fat cats

Ed Miliband today promised to pass emergency legislation that would place fat cats under house arrest. In his keynote speech to conference, the firebrand labour leader spoke movingly of the wasted...

0
Lenny Bee 24.09.13 4:42pm
Lenny Bee
Lidl Littlehampton to close after pronunciation difficulties

The Littlehampton branch of Lidl is to follow the fate of the supermarket chain's first New York City based store. Lidl spokesman Mike Smythe told The Grocer magazine: "Lidl Little Italy was a...

3
nickb 24.09.13 4:32pm
Midfield Diamond
Porn block "will end random access mammaries" 0
sydalg 24.09.13 3:58pm
sydalg
Women dismiss premature ejaculator as "Mr Spray-and-dangle" 0
sydalg 24.09.13 3:56pm
sydalg
Sunderland players now unlikely to train on time 3
Ironduke 24.09.13 3:52pm
sydalg
Miliband wavelengths of light render policies invisible. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 24.09.13 3:13pm
Al OPecia
Students dropping out of uni on finding iPads full of 'academic shit'

Thousands of undergraduates are dropping out of university on discovering their iPads are full of academic texts. 'I thought it was cool when I got an iPad to use at uni,' said Brad Baker, who is...

0
roybland 24.09.13 3:12pm
roybland
Toddlers ‘excited’ by post-watershed content

The BBC Trust has said that CBBC and Cbeebies should extend their programming beyond 19:00, to target the nocturnal needs of a younger generation craving late night depictions of ’graphic...

2
Wrenfoe 24.09.13 3:11pm
Wrenfoe
Boots Pharmacy launch tablet 20
Loundshay 24.09.13 2:56pm
Flugelbinder
Sunderland Final Straw Revealed: Di Canio's New Kit Designed by Hugo Boss

It was revealed today the final straw that caused Sunderland players to demand the sacking of Paulo Di Canio. Apparently at his final team meeting he unveiled a, admittedly very stylish, new kit...

0
SimonJJames 24.09.13 2:48pm
SimonJJames
Ronnie Wood found in Irish peat bog

but doubts are raised as carbon-dating identifies the remains as being a mere 4,000 years old...

0
Landfill 24.09.13 1:21pm
Landfill
British Adventurer argues with herself all the way from Japan to Alaska

Oh wait sorry, Adventurer "Rows Solo" from Japan to Alaska...

2
Flugelbinder 24.09.13 12:21pm
Flugelbinder
New aerosol USB device gets limp response 0
J Vine 24.09.13 11:54am
J Vine