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Social Media Firms Braced For Saucy New Year Party Pics

Facebook, Twitter and Instagram users partying hard tonight will be able to use a new app launched today. Drunken partygoers who don't want tonight's over-the-top excesses forever memorialized on...

0
Laura Norder 31.12.13 4:26pm
Laura Norder
Scots warned not to ski hauf pissed. 0
weematt 31.12.13 4:22pm
weematt
Bulgarian and Romanian immigrants read Daily Mail and head back home

People's fears of mass immigration from Bulgaria and Romania may soon be gone after the government piloted a scheme of giving everyone who came to the UK a copy of the Daily Mail at the border....

4
James Pluside 31.12.13 4:20pm
Plot126
Schumacher getting back up to speed after unscheduled piste stop.

Get well soon Michael...

0
bonjonelson 31.12.13 3:52pm
bonjonelson
'Auld acquaintances to be forgot' says Salmond 2
Dick Everyman 31.12.13 3:36pm
Dick Everyman
Toys R Us to stock pink guns 'to counter gender bias'... 4
Tripod 31.12.13 3:24pm
Sinnick
Sheep To Pay For Better Fireworks After Dismal NZ New Year

http://whisperingirls.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Fireworks-go-off-from-Auc-0161.jpg Hundreds of New Year party-goers launched a furious tirade against the Government over the lackluster...

0
Laura Norder 31.12.13 3:22pm
Laura Norder
Cameron admits he's drunk Pastis 9
beau-jolly 31.12.13 3:15pm
Al OPecia
H-bomb to be included in new year firework display

Following magnificent displays around the world to commemorate the beginning of 2014, the organisers of the London display have announced the chiming of Big Ben will be synchronised with the...

0
james_doc 31.12.13 2:24pm
james_doc
Waitrose coffee with added 'Chav' sounds revolting

Customers at Waitrose stores across the land are revolting over the free coffee being offered. Not because it tastes disgusting but because the offer of a free coffee or tea every day to, and here's...

1
irreverendJ 31.12.13 1:49pm
WMatty
Druids working round the clock to restore ley lines

The council of British Druids are working through the night to restore ley lines which have been damaged by recent storms. Many households have been without spiritual energy through the Christmas...

10
apepper 31.12.13 1:47pm
Squudge
Angela Lansbury made Dame for services to over-the-hill actors.

On hearing the news of her New Year's honour Miss Lansbury said she was delighted to have been recognised in this way. "I owe much to the managers and staff of the care homes who prepare and supply...

0
weematt 31.12.13 10:28am
weematt
Angry Birds Strike Back

http://www.timeslive.co.za/lifestyle/2013/12/31/giant-rubber-duck-explodes-in-taiwan-again Kevin, did you have anything to do with this?...

1
Titus 31.12.13 10:26am
Kevin the Swan
Scottish winner of All England Club championship slighted rather than knighted.

A Palace spokesperson said that although this was the first time for 73 years that the Wimbledon mens' singles title had been won by a player who was not a complete foreigner, there was a...

0
weematt 31.12.13 9:54am
weematt
Supermarkets to open "Faith Banks"

Following the collapse in the market of Faith Providers such as the Cof E once known for it's cheap and easy "pick and mix" faith services and more upmarket providers such as the Catholic Church...

0
vulture1 30.12.13 11:42pm
vulture1
Reunited for Christmas: identical twin toys, separated at the manufacturer

Two Identical soft toys that were separated only a few weeks after being manufactured, have been miraculously reunited two years later and just in time for Christmas. Neither toy had any idea that...

5
Slante Dangle 30.12.13 8:49pm
blokefromstoke
Monopoly Commission finds there are too many versions of the board game 0
custard cream 30.12.13 5:02pm
custard cream
Gove rewrites GCSE History curriculum then claims the English throne 0
Plot126 30.12.13 4:07pm
Plot126
Justin Bieber gives the World a Christmas present by retiring. More soon. 3
Al OPecia 30.12.13 3:31pm
Al OPecia
'Farage Is Messing With Our Heads' Complains Tory Spokesman

"Until now, we have been able to contain UKIP by dismissing them as xenophobic bigots" said the spokesman "But by calling for the UK to accept Syrian refugees - which the government refuses to do -...

1
Titus 30.12.13 2:47pm
Wrenfoe
All those who make big New Year promises on Facebook to be ‘tested in June’

All those who publicly air their New Year promises and plans with really long Facebook status updates will be ‘thoroughly tested in June’, according to a new initiative. The government funded...

0
Jesus H 30.12.13 1:08pm
Jesus H
‘We don’t need a lift, we just appreciate good driving’, say men with thumbs up

Members of the Good Driving Appreciation Society have spoken of their frustration today at regularly being mistaken for people trying to hitch a lift. The Yorkshire based group, formed in 2009,...

1
Jesus H 30.12.13 12:16pm
Jesus H
Waitrose coffee is revolting

Customers at Waitrose stores across the land are revolting over the free coffee being offered. Not because it tastes disgusting but because the offer of a free coffee or tea every day to, and here's...

0
irreverendJ 30.12.13 11:40am
irreverendJ
Storm-hit Isle of Wight gets electricity.

UK Power has apologised to customers for the delay in restoring power to thousands of homes across the country, blaming the fact that engineers were dispatched to the Isle of Wight first....

0
Boutros 29.12.13 10:22pm
Boutros
Taking you up the aisle - local supermarket introduces 'ethical' checkout system

A Hampenshire branch of Sainsbury’s has introduced a new checkout system pandering to staff’s own woolly ethics. Customers wishing to buy a couple of bottles of sherry and a copy of the Daily...

4
Plot126 29.12.13 9:39pm
Titus
Afterlife transport links slammed

Journeys to the afterlife have been branded "extremely dangerous" by the Transport select committee. "Not only is there an unacceptable fatality rate of 100%, the "no-returns" policy means that there...

0
apepper 29.12.13 9:18pm
apepper
Nigella launches seasonal book of ‘Cold Turkey’ recipes... 3
Tripod 29.12.13 8:23pm
blacklesbianandproudofit
‘Your prayer is important to us’, God insists.‘Yeah, right!’...

In a ribbon-cutting ceremony attended by cherubim, seraphim, saints, the great, the good and other celestial bodies, God has declared his new state-of-the-art prayer centre ‘well and truly open’....

1
Tripod 29.12.13 6:23pm
Titus
Boston church rises above flooding 0
davetwojackets 29.12.13 5:58pm
davetwojackets
Pygmies who visited Edwardian England found very little to do 1
davetwojackets 29.12.13 5:49pm
Tripod