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Manchester United commissions sculpture of Fergie made of chewing gum. 3
Al OPecia 08.05.13 9:05pm
Archbishop of Canterbury calls Bishop of London "A complete and utter cunt" 0
Drylaw 08.05.13 8:55pm
Floodlights dim at Dynamo Kiev as players tire in extra time 0
LensCap 08.05.13 8:49pm
Chewing gum complains Fergie just used me, abused me, then spat me out. 0
irreverendJ 08.05.13 8:11pm
Elderly Scot released from captivity

In a scene eerily similar to the recent FBI rescues in Ohio, Greater Manchester Police confirmed that a seventy one year old man was held for "decades" in a house on Moss Side. Restrained with...

Wrenfoe 08.05.13 7:56pm
The All New Jeni B
Sir Alex Ferguson 'not interested in taking over at Man. City' shock 0
custard cream 08.05.13 7:11pm
custard cream
Pressure on Manu Ginobili to replace Ferguson

People without any interest in football are pressing Spurs player Manu Ginobili to replace Alex Ferguson as manager of Manchester United. "The only way I can remember who manages what team is if...

apepper 08.05.13 7:04pm
BBC on screen newsroom “to look more lively”

BBC executives have criticised the panoramic shot of the BBC newsroom that forms a backdrop to Huw Edwards and said staff featured in the background should dress loudly and not keep so still. “It...

nickb 08.05.13 6:38pm
"My Sylvia Browne reading was bang on"

Many are calling her fraudulent and even 'evil', but as the online backlash against self-proclaimed psychic medium Sylvia Browne rages, after missing teen Amanda Berry turned up alive fully nine...

Idiot 08.05.13 6:22pm
Tsetse fly blamed for under-performing GCSEs

Today’s Queen’s Speech signaled a radical overhaul of the GCSE system in light of the recent discovery that the Tsetse fly has been spreading “sleeping sickness” amongst pupils. Boston...

Wrenfoe 08.05.13 5:26pm
Queen appoints Sir Alex Ferguson as Prince Regent 0
custard cream 08.05.13 5:01pm
custard cream
Parts of Surrey gridlocked as fans congregate to discuss Ferguson loss. 3
reforse 08.05.13 4:51pm
Des Custard
Fergie's chewing gum admits retirement leaves a nasty taste in the mouth 0
irreverendJ 08.05.13 3:32pm
Ray Harryhausen to be buried in glorious Technicolour 'stop-motion' funeral 2
AReader 08.05.13 3:24pm
Next United boss was determined by Apprentice-style firings

The successor to Sralex Ferguson as the manager of Manchester United has been chosen via a series of elimination tests, resulting in many managers losing their jobs. Throughout the season, a large...

Midfield Diamond 08.05.13 2:26pm
Midfield Diamond
" Day 3650 in the Big Brother house ....... " 1
rob box 08.05.13 2:18pm
Sir Alex Ferguson to become BBC pundit 0
joefall 08.05.13 2:11pm
Lottery winner with third testicle puts good fortune down to bonus ball. 4
sredni vashta 08.05.13 2:03pm
sredni vashta
Cartoon Dog successfully sues Buxom Female character for detatched retinas


gaijintendo 08.05.13 1:58pm
sredni vashta
Queen's Speech suffers stammer as Government promises to remove foreigners 0
AReader 08.05.13 1:52pm
Bloke gets old woman to do the talking

“Don’t get me wrong he ain’t racist or nuffink, but people who don’t belong here are gonna find it no fun next year what wiv hospitals refusing to give em so much as a painkiller unless they...

nickb 08.05.13 1:41pm
White smoke over Old Trafford to herald new United manager

Moyes soon...

johnnydobbo 08.05.13 12:59pm
Harry Redknapp realises his team was one man short

Sinnick 08.05.13 12:48pm
Harry Redknapp announces availability as Premiership football manager 0
Sinnick 08.05.13 12:45pm
Iran's Nuclear Scientists to purchase 3-D printer 0
Sinnick 08.05.13 12:44pm
Paper on academic plagiarism 'copied from news article 20 years ago' 0
John Wiltshire 08.05.13 12:28pm
John Wiltshire
Paper on academic plagiarism 'copied from news article 20 years ago' 0
AReader 08.05.13 12:21pm
Crap Media Studies degree courses facing closure warn under-achieving academics

Scores of rubbish Media Studies degrees around the country are facing closure, according to the lecturers’ union NOPULU (Not Proper University Lecturers’ Union). The warning follows new figures...

Skylarking 08.05.13 12:19pm
Fergie to carry on for another 7 minutes at end of season 1
Backup Brian 08.05.13 12:16pm
Alex Ferguson retires as manager but stays as changing room hairdryer

If it ain't broke...

AReader 08.05.13 12:11pm