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Jeremy Hunt: Revised nurse training to "outlaw smothering patients with pillows"

more (radical proposals) soon...

2
dvo4fun 26.03.13 9:31pm
dvo4fun
Follicly-challenged Yorkshireman buys twig 7
Smart Alex 26.03.13 8:59pm
Flash! Aa-aaaa!
May shapes up in food crisis

In light of the recent triangular flapjack furore, and in a populist move to attract the Essex vote, the government is to introduce the Dangerous Triangular Food Act and promises not to fudge the...

1
Reg Herring 26.03.13 8:58pm
Flash! Aa-aaaa!
Some households in north of England still without Royal update warn Met Office

Thousands of homes around the UK have been without an update on the Duchess of Cambridge’s health for several hours say emergency services., Severe weather has left some homes in the north of...

20
Gerontius 26.03.13 8:44pm
Al OPecia
WWII American pilots have safety concerns over Jap flak 0
Smart Alex 26.03.13 7:20pm
Smart Alex
School Catering Staff Now Required To Wear Protective Flapjackets 0
Titus 26.03.13 6:28pm
Titus
Cypriots unworried by pointy flapjacks but do have concerns over Angular Merkel

More contrived news soon...

1
Smart Alex 26.03.13 6:26pm
Titus
New Strain of M.E. Develops Resistance to Placebos

Doctors warned today that made-up disease M.E. - also known as "yuppy flu" - is developing resistance to all known placebos. "It's really worrying", said a leading clinician. "M.E. isn't actually an...

13
deceangli 26.03.13 6:18pm
bonjonelson
Dizzie Gillespie......

.All swings and roundabouts, man!...

0
Jesse Bigg 26.03.13 6:03pm
Jesse Bigg
Tory Leadership Change In The Air?

From bouffant to buffoon?...

0
Jesse Bigg 26.03.13 5:45pm
Jesse Bigg
Eddie Mair interviews Nick Griffin, "You're a Nazi piece of work, aren't you?" 0
Walter Eagle 26.03.13 5:41pm
Walter Eagle
Lindsey Vonn delighted to have Tiger Woods back on top

"I'm so glad he's started to find the hole again", she added, "Tiger's been a long time in the rough, and we're both enjoying it so much more now. I do believe I came in to his life at the right...

0
Walter Eagle 26.03.13 5:22pm
Walter Eagle
Government Health Warning....

'Old three penny bit highly dangerous!'...

0
Jesse Bigg 26.03.13 5:18pm
Jesse Bigg
Campaigners warn Google Glasses may be 'half empty' 0
bonjonelson 26.03.13 5:05pm
bonjonelson
Consultants’ Report on Consultants’ Proves Importance of Consultants

[i]Listen To Us![/i] a new independent report on the work of consultants, by consulting firm Logorrhea, affirms their role in business and government as being “strategically vital” and...

0
Iggy Pop-Barker 26.03.13 5:03pm
Iggy Pop-Barker
Pope to feature in new Easter TV special "Whose Lamb Is It Anyway" 0
Walter Eagle 26.03.13 4:57pm
Walter Eagle
Nigel Adkins given a Ray Mears book to help make his dreams come true

no more soon. Especially one that probably needs to be explained...

0
Not Amused 26.03.13 4:25pm
Not Amused
Richard III Final Resting Place To Be Discussed At 20,00-Strong Bosworth Meeting 0
Titus 26.03.13 3:31pm
Titus
“Fluffy animal deaths NOT my fault” – A message from the Chancellor

In what appears to be a pre-emptive attack, the Treasury this morning released details of a speech to be given by George Osborne. In it, the Chancellor distances himself from the deaths of adorable...

0
Ablative Fabsolute 26.03.13 2:53pm
Ablative Fabsolute
Foxy Knoxy 'no longer too pretty to be guilty', rule Italians 2
cinquecento 26.03.13 2:52pm
cinquecento
In a reversal of fortune Thagorus Pie off school menus 0
irreverendJ 26.03.13 1:28pm
irreverendJ
Easter break in Florence may now be cancelled, says Amanda Knox 0
medici2471 26.03.13 1:17pm
medici2471
Chinese supermarket recalls misfortune cookies 0
Dick Everyman 26.03.13 12:44pm
Dick Everyman
Amanda Knox offered ‘best of three’ trial option... 0
Tripod 26.03.13 12:39pm
Tripod
40% of Cypriot sperm bank deposits to be creamed off by EU 0
pere floza 26.03.13 12:28pm
pere floza
RSPCA issues reminder to put out mint sauce for frozen lambs 0
cinquecento 26.03.13 12:19pm
cinquecento
Sales of Doughnuts increase due to killer flapjack scare

more later...

0
Scronnyglonkle 26.03.13 11:40am
Scronnyglonkle
School canteen puts up flapjack warning sine 3
charlies_hat 26.03.13 11:32am
seymour totti
Breaking hypotenews, Pythagorus arrested over flapjacks! 0
topfotogmw 26.03.13 11:29am
topfotogmw
"Flapjack attacks an acute problem", claims Justice Secretary! 0
topfotogmw 26.03.13 11:20am
topfotogmw