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Xmas Card industry paralysed as entire nation "waits to see who sends us one"

Greeting card retailers and the mail rooms of Post Offices across the country were described as "eerily quiet" in early December, as the usual rush to send Christmas cards failed to materialise and...

2
Re Pete 06.12.12 10:12am
Re Pete
Insurance claim rejected because Kindle Fire was left on overnight 0
custard cream 06.12.12 10:05am
custard cream
Researchers discover loading thousands of books on Kindle makes device heavier 0
custard cream 06.12.12 10:03am
custard cream
Police step up hunt for missing debt target

Whitehall and the House of Commons are effectively in lock down as the Police continued their search of the Offices and park areas around Westminster for Chancellor George Orbourne's missing debt...

4
beagle 06.12.12 9:51am
Squudge
Men terrified as girlfriends declare that Bad Sex award nominees make them wet

Some spent the night hiding in the backyard, others drank until they reached the barren desert of floppiness, still others came home wearing a chastity belt hastily constructed from office supplies....

0
thumper 06.12.12 9:51am
thumper
'It's a Knockout' to be renamed 'It's a Rohypnol' 1
DustyBinLaden 06.12.12 9:50am
Gaz
It's a Knock-One-Out !

Do I get the prize for the tackiest pun ?...

0
Sinnick 06.12.12 9:13am
Sinnick
South Korea hit by new ‘Dagenham Style’ craze

The nightlife of South Korean capital Seoul has become gripped by a new British craze known as Dagenham Style. Hundreds of young girls dressed in vest-tops, mini-skirts and red stilettos totter...

3
Midfield Diamond 06.12.12 8:53am
dvo4fun
Ed Balls blames 'shit performance' in Commons on Irritable Bowel Syndrome 0
pinxit 06.12.12 8:26am
pinxit
New Year's Honours List undergoing "last minute revision". More soon. 0
Al OPecia 06.12.12 8:19am
Al OPecia
France looking to UK Royals to replace fall in French sperm production

France is looking to build a "jizz pipeline" to pump UK produced sperm as a replacement for recent declines in French sperm production. The French Government has also called for the outsourcing of...

1
simonjmr 06.12.12 3:32am
Squudge
Royal baby - hoax caller to be transported

Bound for Botany Bay...

1
Rootin Tootin 06.12.12 3:31am
Squudge
New Zealand's Dame Beryl Sheepshank Dies At 104.

Fulfills her vow to outlive "trumped-up hussy" Elisabeth Murdoch...

0
rikkor 06.12.12 2:04am
rikkor
Osborne tells Multinationals to pay Corporation Tax on 'honesty box' system.

It's there in the small print of the Autumn Statement...

0
deskpilot3 05.12.12 11:35pm
deskpilot3
Richard III denies historic offences 1
nickb 05.12.12 10:52pm
Scronnyglonkle
Baffeld Police liken Stuart Hall's statements worse than his match reports.

played my joker there...

0
Scronnyglonkle 05.12.12 10:50pm
Scronnyglonkle
Nairobi streets gritted as MET Office confirms: 'There won't be snow in Africa..

this Christmas-time'...

0
ianslat 05.12.12 8:39pm
ianslat
Eddie Waring's "up and under" to be investigated 0
nickb 05.12.12 8:34pm
nickb
Dettori 'unaware that ketamine was for the horse' claim 0
custard cream 05.12.12 8:16pm
custard cream
Dave Brubeck dies in suicide bomb. Takes five with him...

I'll get my coat...

0
MADJEZ 05.12.12 7:53pm
MADJEZ
Hall claims it was just Jeux Sans Frontières. 1
MADJEZ 05.12.12 7:46pm
Sinnick
Queen fed-up. No-one believes its her on the phone. 0
MADJEZ 05.12.12 7:06pm
MADJEZ
Rape victim claims 'he played his joker' 0
MADJEZ 05.12.12 6:44pm
MADJEZ
Later on BBC1, It's a Knob-Out! 0
Scroat 05.12.12 6:40pm
Scroat
Reformed Page 3's Pippa from Bolton says Stuart Hall “Ain't yet guilty"

..not a single word more DVO.. that's a promise....

0
05.12.12 5:59pm
Media in frenzy as someone admits responsibility for something. More soon. 0
Gaz 05.12.12 5:48pm
Gaz
Stuart Hall arrest: Tabloid editors in mad dash for 'It's a Knockout' rape puns

.. and that's all I'll say about the matter (out of respect for dvo's tsunami concerns)...

1
Nowherefast 05.12.12 5:42pm
ronseal
Osborne introduces "OAP celebrity rapist tax", country's debt gone within weeks. 0
Gaz 05.12.12 5:25pm
Gaz
Tony Blackburn asks "Who do I have to rape to get back in the limelight?" 0
Gaz 05.12.12 5:23pm
Gaz
New Blah blah blah Bill ‘could save a lot of parliamentary time’ 0
malgor 05.12.12 5:23pm
malgor