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Authorities in Japan are surprised when they try to congatulate a man 2
arrghgarry 2 years

becoming the oldest man in Japan turning 111 ,it appears he was ill (very) not 111 he had died 30 years previous...
Government outsources entire benefits system to the Taliban 1
la maga 2 years

In a bid to both discourage bogus benefits claimants and increase legitimate employment opportunities for Afghan militants, the government is to outsource jobcentres and the benefits system to the...
Jaqui Smith applies for 77K job at the BBC boasting her vast experience 0
arrghgarry 2 years

of fiddling expenses ,I am a team player and I am sure that I can show the BBC board a thing or two about fiddling expenses .I am sure I will fit in well with this group of idle ,well connected...
Pamplona to host next year's Love Parade. 0
the coarse whisperer 2 years
Anything-I-happen-not-to-like-phobia makes it into the DSM V. 0
the coarse whisperer 2 years
After Ronaldo Cristiano`s gains complete custody of his first child 0
arrghgarry 2 years

he denies that he is the New Michael Jackson ,Mark Lester did mention that he gave Ronaldo a bit of spunk once ,and should Ronaldo ask "any more " he would be willing to step up to the plate or dish...
Daily Mail readers vote Nick Clegg 'Personality of the Year' 0
PluckyMunky 2 years

Gloria Bartram, writing for the Mail, says, 'there is no doubt that Nick has left an indelible mark on the fabric that is British Society.'...
Man spends a day at work down the sewer to raise money for BBC Luvvies in Need 0
StoopyDeGunt 2 years

The British public has risen to the challenge of raising money for the BBC Luvvies in Need appeal, raising £145 each in an endless variety of zany way., Bob Jones, from Croydon, spent the entire...
X-Factor's Joe McElderry…Gay my arse ! 1
BlackAndroid 2 years

Cliff Richards speaking from his Barbados mansion today hit out in anger at yet another gay acting straight man trying to steal the limelight. Sir Cliff ranted “That little shyster is about as gay...
Dame Judi to be next Queen Mum? 0
euanc 2 years

Sources close to the palace reveal that the Grande Dame of British Theatre, Dame Judi Dench, is being strongly tipped to take on the vacant role of Queen Mother. "Her regal presence and enthusiasm...
Israeli President accuses English of anti-Semitism 0
ramblesnake 2 years

and always favouring the wogs...
West Ham ease financial crisis by selling 12,000 fans. 5
bonjonelson 2 years

In a unexpected move, the management of West Ham United have announced they have taken advantage of this summer's transfer window to sell up to 12,000 of their fans to rival clubs. Management hope...
Blue Peter's Zombie Watch critcised by Parent-Teacher Associations. 1
bonjonelson 2 years

BBC Childrens' programme Blue Peter has come under fire today from the National Association of Parent-Teacher Associations for this year's "Zombie Watch", where children are being encouraged to go...
Lyn Barber claims to have slept with 50 men during two terms 3
arrghgarry 2 years

meanwhile 50 men are having traumatic recall symptoms...
Ministry of Justice Cuts Possession to Seven Tenths of the Law 2
mugwump 2 years

Ministry of Justice Cuts Possession to Seven Tenths of the Law...
Government spokesman insists 'Fat Cunts' moniker for obese is not demeaning. 7
The Return of DroleNoel 2 years

Much more soon...
Cameron to introduce new Poor Law Bill 1
PluckyMunky 2 years

Similar to the 1834 Poor Law Act, it will address the following issues:, * reduce the cost of looking after the poor, * take beggars off the streets, * encourage poor people to work...
Tai chi 'just very slow P.E.' admits leading guru. More soon. 2
malgor 2 years
Obama diverts troops from Iraq to secure Clinton's NY wedding 0
Dumbnews 2 years
Cameron and Clegg admit 'doing tongues' at royal reception 0
PluckyMunky 2 years

'I've had better', says Cameron...
Hot cakes not actually selling that fast 0
Oxbridge 2 years
Ryanair to charge you for queueing...... 0
SilverWinterSky 2 years

Ryanair announced today its intention to charge "by the minute" for the use of its check-in queues. A spokesman said "We think this is a logical extension of our pricing model and will help...
Huntley "should not sue" - victims groups appeal to his better nature 0
Izziere 2 years

According to the BBC, "victims' groups have said that Soham killer Ian Huntley "should not sue" over jail attack." Campaigners have made an appeal to the paedophiliac child killer's better nature in...
Partially deaf Catholic priests rush to Afghanistan on discovery of Bum Factory 0
brownpaperreporter 2 years
IDF 617 Squadron, "The Prambusters" Back in Action 1
afternoonslow 2 years

IDF 617 Squadron, "The Prambusters" a squadron formed specifically to bomb Dammed Palestinians has been in herioc action once more. Haaretz.com Sat, July 31, Israel retaliates for rocket attack...
Ian Huntley's 100 grand payout to be made in pound coins 1
ramblesnake 2 years

shoved up his arse (I hope)...
In addition to damages Ian Huntley now claiming royalties 0
Ian Searle 2 years

every time his picture is used by newspapers and TV...
Government tells armed forces that spending will be restricted to "cool shit." 0
mrlemoncurry 2 years

In a report released today , the coalition revealled it's plans for future spending on defence . In it it revealled that high profile weapons will only be bought if they look good on the recruitment...
'Radical' coalition government unmasks, raises hammer and sickle over No. 10 0
la maga 2 years
Western Civilisation makes good progress spreading democracy, project management 1
la maga 2 years

After centuries of struggling to take parliamentary democracy and good project management techniques to the furthest reaches of the globe, Western Civilisation is feeling pretty pleased with progress...