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Galloway attacker to call 42 million character witnesses

The same joke, and yet not the same...

AReader 01.09.14 1:12pm
CBI say foreign-owned UK airports must expand or untaxed profits won't increase. 0
Crayon 01.09.14 1:09pm
Friends Of Green Earthpiece Now Tell Us What To Eat, As Well As How To Vacuum 2
Titus 01.09.14 1:06pm
Ryanair removes toilets to add extra seats, offers Depends for only 10 Euros 0
Jim Garner 01.09.14 11:22am
Jim Garner
Stuart Wheeler Innundated With Calls From Lib Dem MPs Seeking Lunch Invitations 0
Titus 01.09.14 11:20am
Saying Spanish Health Service is Better Than NHS Is a Crime

"How dare they say we are crap"...

Dun Dunkin 01.09.14 7:50am
Dun Dunkin
New Geometry Sets Start Gathering Dust From Today. 2
IABP 2 01.09.14 7:37am
Apple launch isPhone for exploding Middle Eastern markets.

FaceTime renamed HeadTime...

Crayon 01.09.14 5:43am
Putin's 'New Russia' Very Much Like 'Old USSR' 0
Dun Dunkin 31.08.14 9:45pm
Dun Dunkin
BBC relieved as Great British Bake Off scandal forces Rotherham off the newsdesk

“It’s a never-ending nightmare for our news editors”, said BBC Head of News Ted Bunnett, “Constantly juggling with items coming at them at speed. “Take the Islamic State. On the one hand,...

beckfordburger 31.08.14 8:41pm
Galloway attacker rushed to hospital for rabies shots

Hat tip to Al Opecia...

sydalg 31.08.14 8:05pm
Man admits He Doesn't 'Get' Kate Bush Performance

"All that arm waving and stuff. Bit bonkers if you ask me. Was it therapy?"...

Dun Dunkin 31.08.14 8:01pm
Dun Dunkin
Big Tesco Shareholder Reduces its Steak. 0
Dun Dunkin 31.08.14 7:55pm
Dun Dunkin
PM may block return of UKIPists

"Anyone joining UKIP Isn't welcome back if they leave the country especially if they live in Clacton."...

Dun Dunkin 31.08.14 7:45pm
Dun Dunkin
Protopopoff identified as first Russian killed in Ukraine campaign 0
Jim Garner 31.08.14 7:44pm
Jim Garner
Homeopathic Ebola vaccine found to be 0.00000001% effective in trials 6
Bigglesworth 31.08.14 7:37pm
Nick Clegg to use everyone's paternity leave next year

Anticipating he will have a lot of 'free time on his hands' after the next election, the Deputy Prime Minister has volunteered to provide round-the-clock support to all new parents. The Liberal...

Wrenfoe 31.08.14 7:17pm
Police launch Operation Palmtree to investigate celebrity Asian paedophiles.

Following the success of both Operation Yewtree and multicultural policing throughout South Yorkshire, the Government's Crime Prevention Minister has announced the launch of Operation Palmtree. The...

Crayon 31.08.14 4:04pm
YES campaign rebrands as IS and prepares to declare Caledoniphate

In Edinburgh today, Alex Salmond announced that the YES campaign would now be called IS (short for Independent Scotland) to better reflect the values of Scots wishing to separate from the UK. ...

cinnahmon 31.08.14 4:02pm
Man with wide and varied collection of power sockets suffers eclectic shock 0
Smart Alex 31.08.14 3:12pm
Smart Alex
TV & Radio Celebrity Broadcaster "Happily Married, Satisfied and Content"

It's been reported in a Sunday scoop today, that a respected Media figure has announced that he is "happy with his lot in life" and grateful for what he has got., He has never been interested in...

MrPhill 31.08.14 3:12pm
Commentators hope Arsenal don’t sign Papastathopoulos 2
farmer giles 31.08.14 2:00pm
Ted King
Tech research cuts blamed as WW3 unlikely to be fought by giant killer robots. 0
Crayon 31.08.14 1:59pm
Village Pub Gentrification renames Dog and Duck to Lama and Peacock.

"New dress code and gastro menu and No TV Football Only Open Fri-Sun"...

Dun Dunkin 31.08.14 11:52am
Joan Rivers: ‘Switch that thing off. I can’t hear myself think up my next joke’ 2
beckfordburger 31.08.14 11:42am
Charlie Fairhurst to head BBC Trust

Yes Charlie Fairhurst the long suffering senior nurse from BBC's Casualty is the new head of the BBC Trust. Whilst viewers watched him get a diagnosis of angina in last night's programme the BBC...

2escapees 31.08.14 11:06am
Pandas Transferred To Rotherham In Hope Of Increasing Their Sexual Activity

And Shaun Wright appointed as zoo keeper...

Titus 31.08.14 9:05am
Man still being studiously ignored in room full of elephants

Though hovering by the peanuts and desperately trying to make eye contact, Dave Harris is still finding it hard to get noticed by the largely elephantine occupants of The Room. It's a turn of events...

ronseal 31.08.14 8:07am
Shaun Wright To Join 'Respect' Party In Attempt To Become Less Unpopular 0
Titus 31.08.14 7:33am
Daily Mail readers panic-buy vacuum flasks.

"I hate the EU" said 75 year old Mrs Ada Jackson, "but the thirty I've just bought should see me out"...

Tammy Flugh 31.08.14 7:20am