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Ryanair announce turd runway at Knock airport 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Cannabis users deny claims of IQ loss 0
apepper 3 years

"It's, like, not, er, you know, false, er true."...

Holistic healers amazed as new natural ingredient actually does something 0
kimllfixit 3 years

Herbal medicine creators and homeopaths were today said to be “very excited” at the reports of a new natural ingredient with proven painkilling properties. Derived from the coco plant, the white...

Martians threaten invasion if NASA goes ahead with planned Will I.Am broadcast 0
Mark66 3 years
Essex police armed with dining room chairs and whips 5
charlies_hat 3 years
Clacton's Wizard of Oz panto gets unexpected publicity over the weekend 0
simonjmr 3 years

After the actor playing the cowardly lion is seen wandering the streets in costume. More soon...

First Michael Jackson. Now Neil Armstrong.Are Moonwalkers cursed, asks Daily Ma 3
ronseal 3 years
Search for intelligent Essex Policemen called off.. 0
RickH 3 years

..entire force currently looking for a jabberwocky outside Romford...

Yahoo CEO to be deported after inserting his search toolbar without permission 0
Hurrumph 3 years

(yes, I know, I should have unticked a box somewhere. I was still asleep) More soon...

This page has been intentionally left blank 0
Squudge 3 years
Research finds that smoking weed can make you ‘err..... stuff’ 4
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

A team of researchers in New Zealand have conducted a study into the effects of smoking cannabis at a young age, and concluded that ‘Smoking weed while your brain is still developing can make you,...

Older bees find young bees' dancing "incomprehensible". 8
nickb 3 years
Longleat Monkeys finally complete Vauxhall Astra Project 13
button 3 years

After 5 years of hard work the monkeys of Longleat drive through Safari have put the finishing touches to a metallic blue Vauxhall Astra. Paul, spokesmen for the 100 strong Rhesus monkey troop told...

Young bees "embarrassed" by older bees dancing. More soon. 1
Al OPecia 3 years
Annual Taliban dinner dance fundraiser postponed. 0
Maverick 3 years
Philip in the pink 1
Squudge 3 years

So nice to see (HRH) Philip looking well again,

Gardener Questions Thyme. 4
The All New Jeni B 3 years

I'm [s]sorrel[/s] er, sorry...

Stats show number of 5* subs has dipped for first time in Newsbiscuit history 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Tin Man, Scarecrow seen wandering in Herts as UK prepares for more storms. 4
nickb 3 years
Vox Pops ultimately inconclusive, concludes Vox Pops 2
Chindle 3 years

In a blow to lazy television producers everywhere, a recent series of Vox Pops suggested they fail to provide any legitimate insight. The Vox Pops, recorded in whatever town centre the cameraman and...

Medieval Torture To Be Introduced In UK Schools 2
Jonny Shlep 3 years

In a bid to curb unruly behaviour in the classroom, the department of education has decided to introduce a number of brutal disciplinary measures including the use of medieval instruments of torture....

Same sex marriage threatens steady flow of shy,vulnerable children says Bishop 3
tedweasel 3 years
Splinter group demands tax breaks on tweezers 0
nickb 3 years
Police call off the search for the "Essex Virgin". More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Short film maker takes cushion to screening 1
nickb 3 years
Neil Armstrong To Be First Man On The Sun 1
Reg Herring 3 years

Neil Armstrong, the first man on the Moon, is also to be the first man on the Sun, it was announced today. This audacious plan is the brainchild of serial British entrepreneur, Sir Richard Branson....

Cameron overheard telling Osborne to go and fuck himself 0
Drylaw 3 years
Essex man who claims to have seen big cat admits he was lion. More soon. 1
dominic_mcg 3 years
Harry gets dressing down from army and dressing gown from grandma 0
nickb 3 years
Police call off search as witness found to be lion 0
writinginbsl 3 years