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Simpson Speaks from Secret Bunker 3
Drylaw 3 years

"They say I'm finished. I'm not finished," spat a defiant John Simpson from the underground fastness of his secret HQ today as the forces of the Young Correspondents Coalition inched ever closer...

Kate Winslet to play Kate Winslet in the movie "Saving Mother Branson" 5
Ian Searle 3 years

An "Expoiltation Films" production in association with "Cashing-In Prodcutions" and Virgin Media...

Chalmers is just Clegg in a wig, make up and a dress claims gutted McPartlin. 0
spoole2112 3 years
Olympic Fever replaces Wembley Complex as cockney sports lovers' sickie excuse 0
spoole2112 3 years

More to follow...

Arkansas woman sues surgeon after husbands penis is reattached 0
spoole2112 3 years

An Arkansas woman has become the first person to sue a surgeon following an entirely successful surgical procedure. The operation resulted in her husband's manhood being reattached in full working...

Radio 4 pospone airing of Richard Branson's Desert Island Risks 0
spoole2112 3 years
Kate Winslet risks life to drag career from flames 0
Nick McCarr 3 years
Downtown Tripoli drag scene welcomes highly unconvincing newcomer 0
Gary Stanton 3 years

Reports that Mummar Gaddafi has disappeared entirely off the radar have somewhat bizarrely coincided with sightings of a rather unkempt newcomer to the drag scene in downtown Tripoli. The act, who...

Kate Winslet admits real rescuer was a stunt double, her face was added in edit. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
After Triopli success Libyan Rebels set their sights on "The Halls of Montezuma" 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Darth Vader takes tour of the Death Star in spite of rebel forces gains 0
Ian Searle 3 years

Should really be Luke Skywalker but hey!...

The Flashing Blade must sign the sex offenders list 2
simonjmr 3 years
Michael Sheen to star as Andy Serkis in Michael Sheen biopic. 5
wallster 3 years

The BBC has announced today that supreme character actor Michael Sheen is to play Andy Serkis in a new film about the life and career of Michael Sheen. Serkis was unavailable to play himself in the...

Scientists: "Norfolk inbreeding diversity not affected by The Lynx effect " 1
thackaray 3 years

Pfizer launches new "Junior Methadone" to replace "Junior Aspirin" 1
antharrison 3 years

"Junior aspirin" a low-dose aspirin table designed to make children think they were taking the same adult drugs, as enjoyed by their parents in the 1960s, 70s and early to mid 80s, was banned...

Gadaffi safe, as rebels can't pronounce Bab Al-Aziziyah to ask for directions. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
Rooneys thin hair after transplant blamed on wrongly prescribed obesity tablets 0
Basil_B 3 years
Cameron becomes Britain's first airmiles millionaire. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Megalomaniac ousted from burning compound: whereabouts of Branson uncertain 0
Stan Laurel 3 years
BBC programme scheduling launches BBC1 + 1 year 1
brownpaperreporter 3 years

The height of Saturday TV for 2007 (insert current year here) Doctor Who, then Strictly Come Dancing and Casualty Only rivalled by "ITV + 1 year" Big Saturday Night In, X-Factor...

IRA send Gaddafi their support with a Happy Ramadan card 0
yussle 3 years
Media celebrates end of Gadaffi with 24 hour coverage.... Oh he's still there. 0
MADJEZ 3 years

More half cocked celebrations soon...

Gaddafi ducks. More soon. 1
Al OPecia 3 years
Iron Man movie success paves way for Toaster and Kettle Man films 0
dicky37 3 years

[More from the kitchen soon]...

EU ruling states that “Cabbage” no longer the standard for vegetative state 1
brownpaperreporter 3 years

“While a brain can be pea-like, as you English say” European Commission health expert M. Truffaud says that the mental state of “Vegetable” can no longer be broad-brushed with the label of...

Nectar points to count towards final score, say UCAS. 0
the coarse whisperer 3 years
Student receives points deduction from UCAS after going into administration. 0
Corrigan 3 years

Basingstoke sixth-former Jake Andrews admitted he was ‘gutted’ today after receiving a 200 point deduction from higher education admittance agency UCAS for becoming financially insolvent. This...

Royal Society for Ornithology to change name of sea gulls to sea bastards 2
Basil_B 3 years

In light of the increasing threat that sea gulls are currently posing for tourists in coastal towns around Britain by attacking them for food the Royal Society for Ornithology have agreed to rename...

New iPhone app calculates calories from the pictures of your food 2
Dumbnews 3 years
Actress sacked from Vagina Monologues for talking out of her arse. 6
wallster 3 years

Grabs tin hat, dives under the table...