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Rumours of pig head in Stoke City dressing room as Sir Alec visits the away team 0
baron la croix 17.05.13 6:38pm
baron la croix
RSPCA condemns animal magnetism. 0
sredni vashta 17.05.13 6:20pm
sredni vashta
Brain falls from man with open mind. 0
godly1966 17.05.13 5:55pm
godly1966
Next Week to Come Two Days Early

Buckingham Palace has announced: Next week is to come two days early. The unexpected move has caused outrage amongst the public. Without the coming weekend millions of Britons who work long, hard...

0
mileslloyd 17.05.13 4:55pm
mileslloyd
'When you walk through a storm, hold your head up high' is 'bad advice'

The Met Office today issued a warning that holding your head up high when you walk through a storm is 'bad advice'. Spokesperson Fiona Moffatt said: 'Our computer modelling, together with anecdotal...

19
John Wiltshire 17.05.13 3:26pm
Sinnick
Die-He-Die! 11
Al OPecia 17.05.13 3:21pm
Sinnick
Podcast from Rockall: fundraising target missed

Sponsors are now refusing to sink more contributions into this remarkable test of endurance. ‘Technically’ said one ‘he’s not even on Rockall anymore, so we don’t have to pay up, do we?’...

0
Crooked Man 17.05.13 2:23pm
Crooked Man
Far right and gay communities unite to watch Eurovision and insult foreigners

An unlikely alliance has formed between BNP members and the UK’s homosexual community to hold an enormous Eurovision street party and be rude about our European neighbours. An ‘up and...

5
DrTurmoil 17.05.13 1:18pm
Skylarking
Arab Spring Didn’t Change Me, says Zebedee

‘Underneath, I’m just the same’ says the bouncy former children’s entertainer. ‘I may look different, what with the beard, but apart from that, nothing’s changed. For example, my vote is...

0
Crooked Man 17.05.13 12:55pm
Crooked Man
Brangelina rename themsleves 'Ngelina'

More adaptations of jokes doing the rounds soon...

10
Oxbridge 17.05.13 12:17pm
rickwestwell
Fury in Scunthorpe as residents oppose Waitrose opening, give us a Lidl campaign 0
simonjmr 17.05.13 11:27am
simonjmr
Ice cream sales plummet as hard-of-hearing Syrian pilot bombs Calippo

More to follow...

0
brianflan 17.05.13 11:08am
brianflan
Beckham retirement designed to distract from wife's shite musical closing 0
topfotogmw 17.05.13 10:57am
topfotogmw
Facebook man feels ‘cheated’ as his ‘like’ doesn’t save child from cancer death.

A Taunton man felt a little deceived today when he discovered that the girl he ‘liked’ in the group ‘1 million likes for my daughter to beat cancer’, died. Mark Pye, a 48 year old road...

17
brianflan 17.05.13 10:56am
brianflan
Ocado agrees to transform Fireservice: Delivering bottled water to your door

More Later...

1
Wrenfoe 17.05.13 10:53am
monkeyrepublic
INTERNATIONAL NEWS: Russia ships weapons to Syria…and coals to Newcastle.

More later...

0
Wrenfoe 17.05.13 10:39am
Wrenfoe
SAS Bust Echidna Scam

Out of work special effects make up artist Mark Pye was yesterday busted in an elaborate sting when trying to sell garden hedgehogs as rare and valuable Australian Echidnas. In a combined operation...

0
brianflan 17.05.13 10:27am
brianflan
Liverpool fan, Benitez, cheekily celebrates with Chelsea players

more later...

0
Wrenfoe 17.05.13 10:26am
Wrenfoe
Hyundai oil “A message from God.”

The owners of a 2006 Hyundai Getz have claimed strange things happen to their car, as tens-of-thousands of true believers flock there to see what it is. Owners Cherry and Mark Pye claim the miracles...

6
brianflan 17.05.13 10:20am
brianflan
Gok Wan to head fire service transformation

The government revealed today that celebrity style guru Gok Wan will be overseeing the transformation of the fire service in England and Wales. Mr Wan told reporters today of his plans for a radical...

3
Scronnyglonkle 17.05.13 10:15am
brianflan
Morrisons' home deliveries to be made by a fleet of Trabants

Announcing their online grocery delivery service, Morrisons today said that their goods will be delivered in a fleet of old East German Trabants. Spokesperson Alison Horsman said: 'It is important...

1
John Wiltshire 17.05.13 10:11am
brianflan
Iron Man 4 to be Cannes opener next year 4
Bertrand Twisted 17.05.13 9:57am
Oxbridge
Crack anti bigotry troops threaten lone man they suspect of being small minded

Scottish Nationalists were cock a hoop last night after fifteen of their crack troops found a small middle aged man in a pub, threatened him with violence and told him to go back to his country....

2
ronseal 17.05.13 8:50am
Wrenfoe
Fugitive jazz saxophonist decides it time to face the music

More sooner...

0
brianflan 17.05.13 8:46am
brianflan
British Youths “Not on Enough Drugs”

British Prime Minister David Cameron held an emergency meeting at Downing Street today to address startling statistics that show a dwindling numbers of teens and young adults who turn to recreational...

1
mileslloyd 17.05.13 7:49am
Wrenfoe
Retiring Beckham declared "national treasure" - police already on the alert

More later...

0
Wrenfoe 17.05.13 6:53am
Wrenfoe
Scotland welcomes UKIP's wee, sleekit, cow'rin, tim'rous beastie 0
Dick Everyman 16.05.13 10:21pm
Dick Everyman
Porsche admit defeat and change name to "Porsch" 4
sredni vashta 16.05.13 9:53pm
brianflan
Man does something else

A man who was doing something decided to stop doing it, in favour of doing something else. “I just lost interest,” said Bryn Smythe (37) from Hull. “I don’t know why. Suddenly the task I...

2
nickb 16.05.13 9:50pm
brianflan
Beckham retirement not linked to hair loss 0
custard cream 16.05.13 9:46pm
custard cream