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NewsBiscuit can reveal....

Online parody and spoof news website NewsBiscuit was thrown into turmoil this morning by a posting which broke all the rules. “He seemed to be doing it deliberately” complained regular...

0
lane-avenger 12.02.13 10:12am
lane-avenger
Boy covered in cream and cherries admits it's tough growing up in the gateaux. 3
godly1966 12.02.13 10:06am
Smart Alex
Valentine's Day tactics for desperate men - the realistic approach

Guys, you are the Harry Redknapp of the world of romance. Not much of a looker and in pretty desperate times with little hope of salvation. But you have an eye for tactics, and the transfer window is...

0
kga6 12.02.13 10:00am
kga6
Catholics 'despondent' after Rafael Benitez accepts vacant Pope position

In a shock turn of the managerial roundabout at Europe's top institutions of football and religion, it was announced today that Rafael Benitez will immediately take up the vacant job of Pope, with...

15
rickwestwell 12.02.13 9:50am
Des Custard
Bears in Woods Suffer Constipation After Pope Becomes Hindu 0
Titus 12.02.13 9:42am
Titus
Head of Catholic Church displays an unusual style of parting.

- neat-o with topical topic...

0
weematt 12.02.13 9:42am
weematt
BBC Threates to Sulk if New Pope is not a Disabled Black Woman 0
Titus 12.02.13 9:32am
Titus
Pope Resigns to Seek New Challenge - Islam Most Likely Destination

Pope Benedict XVI has resigned his position as head of the Catholic Church to seek a new challenge, it has been reported from Rome. A spokesman for Josef Ratzinger, who has immediately reverted to...

2
GreenCross 12.02.13 9:23am
Titus
Surprise That Pope's Resignation Had Not Been Preceded by ...

. statement from God that He had "every confidence" in him...

1
Titus 12.02.13 9:16am
Titus
Mathematicians rejoice as new pope to be chosen of cardinals

Mathematicians around the world are celebrating the news that cardinals are to gather to elect the new pope. "Cardinals are my favourite type of numbers.", enthused Simon Singh, "It would have been...

2
apepper 12.02.13 2:04am
FlashArry
DIGNITAS launches 2 for 1 'Valentine's suicide pact special (BOGOF)' deal...

<Limited availability. Hurry while offer lasts> . More soon...

0
Jammydodgers 12.02.13 1:31am
Jammydodgers
Camden market traders forced to junk 75,000 "I like the Pope" T-Shirts

Just a few short years after the last of the John Paul II T-shirts was incinerated, Camden market traders are facing another change of Pope that will again leave their huge stock of "I like the Pope....

0
Golgo13 12.02.13 1:15am
Golgo13
Horse food found to contain human remains.... 1
deskpilot3 12.02.13 12:36am
deskpilot3
Many cows revealed to be horses.

So hard to tell the difference...

0
deskpilot3 12.02.13 12:32am
deskpilot3
Tesco Finest contains "traces of Pope meat"

The Vatican has strongly denied allegations that it allowed papal material to enter the food chain, after DNA tests confirmed the presence of "up to 100% pope meat in Tesco Finest sausages. ...

1
SuburbanDad 12.02.13 12:30am
deskpilot3
French ban ready meals, as percentage of horse-meat is “unacceptably low”... 1
Tripod 12.02.13 12:29am
deskpilot3
ITV to screen "Pope Idol" 1
Scronnyglonkle 11.02.13 11:34pm
Tess Goes
Man tazered outside the Palace was using the wrong knife

more etiquette soon...

7
Squudge 11.02.13 11:17pm
topfotogmw
Barclays cry foul over customer’s ‘drafting error’

Barclays executives were on the offensive today after a Cheshire man was accused of deception over a 2008 loan that the bank made to him. Justin Lander applied for the loan so he could reinvest in...

0
topfotogmw 11.02.13 10:59pm
topfotogmw
Operation Yewtree reaches Vatican. 4
wallster 11.02.13 10:28pm
rickwestwell
Italian Film Star reveals impending marriage to ex-Pope Benedict

Gina Lollagina the veteran film star has revealed that her relationship with Pope Benedict has reached the point where in the interests of the Universal Catholic Church, he must retire so that they...

0
JoshSpringer 11.02.13 10:23pm
JoshSpringer
Local cat's feet to blame

Police in Ruck have blamed a cat's feet for a string of "hideous crimes". The feet, which have now been removed from the cat, are in isolation. Ruck's mayor signed the severance papers for the five...

3
Mik Bulk 11.02.13 10:16pm
topfotogmw
Sports News

Pope Guardiola linked with Vatican vacancy. More soon...

0
squibby 11.02.13 10:15pm
squibby
Managerial infallibility continutes as Pope Benedict installed at Old Trafford 0
custard cream 11.02.13 10:13pm
custard cream
Birmingham man praises RBS

"I don't know why they were fined", ranted Russell Bertrand from Aston, "what's wrong with trying to fix Libor? I've voted Libor all my loyfe, but since Tony left they need fixing!"...

0
topfotogmw 11.02.13 10:11pm
topfotogmw
Findus introduce "a la carthorse" range

Flogging a dead cow...

0
apepper 11.02.13 10:00pm
apepper
Romanian Stampede

A representative of a company specialising in coach tours across Romania said today that horses were disappearing from across the country and as a result tourism was suffering. “The horses are a...

0
topfotogmw 11.02.13 9:52pm
topfotogmw
Lonely fishmonger blames mullet on his head for lack of girlfriends 5
Psycadelic Squirrel 11.02.13 9:22pm
Squudge
Catholic church to rethink standpoint on early terminations 2
charlies_hat 11.02.13 9:16pm
godly1966
English Jobseeker told to learn Polish

Mohammed Abdul Bin Laden, aged 28 from Birmingham, West Midlands was recently horrified when he attended a Jobcentre Plus work interview and was told that he'd have to learn Polish., Previously all...

2
Tess Goes 11.02.13 8:57pm
Tess Goes