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Border Agency: Britain closed for gold plating all day wednesday 0
vertical 3 years
Pandora`s box advert ruled as lewd and suggestive. 0
woody 3 years

The Advertising Standards Agency today banned all references to Pandora`s box in the Press and Media saying it was suggestive and demeaning to women. The head of the agency Jim Turnbull said they had...

Lady Gaga "not born this way" claims her mother 4
grottymonty 3 years

She was such a sweet girl, til she fell in with a bad lot at Art School., Worth expanding?...

BNP spokeswoman says Aryan births should be on request 1
charlies_hat 3 years
Midgits found alive and well in mobile phone 0
jordanphilips.jnp 3 years

The met police have confirmed today that previous suspicions regarding the phone hacking scandal are indeed true. Small people, or ‘little people’ as they are referred to in the scientific...

Woman who microwaved cat sentenced to do time in a place full of pussy lovers. 0
reforse 3 years
GVT denies 90 year old man too old to work 0
reforse 3 years

The government today was forced to deny its policy of raising retirement ages had reached its limit after a confused 90 year old man was allowed to rejoin the Royal Navy. The pensioner, a Philip...

Microwaved cat gets hot under the coller 0
JETFAB 3 years
Leveson inquiry to investigate claims that MI6 is involved in phone hacking... 0
ndbrown123 3 years
James Murdoch Resigns 0
Paulwoods 3 years

James Murdoch resigns Well it wasnt any fun anymore when you couldn't listen in on private conversations !...

Man City's progress in european masterbating competition 'in their own hands' 0
Perks 3 years
Phone box relocation causes uproar in Sark dogging groups 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years

The tiny island of Sark, population around 600, surprisingly has a thriving dogging community. Unhindered by the fact that there are no motor vehicles allowed on the island, the carefree sex sect...

US border patrols increased as Mariachi band found in Rock n' Roll hall of fame 1
3 years

US President Barack Obama has been forced into an embarrassing climb-down on border policies, after a Mariachi band was found inside the Rock n' Roll hall of fame. Hiding deep inside a philosophical...

Northern Irish women prefer C-sections so they don't have to say "vagina". 1
Al OPecia 3 years
Leveson inquiry attempts to appeal to wider audience as "The Only Way Is Ethics" 3
Ian Searle 3 years
Spot checks on teenagers reveal spots 0
nickb 3 years
Rio Ferdinand to solve more of the world’s problems via Twitter 2
Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Fresh from tackling FIFA President Sepp Blatter over racism, Manchester United defender Rio Ferdinand is set to debate more weighty issues with prominent public figures. From the Eurozone crisis,...

Hello seeks injunction to stop publication of Leveson enquiry photos 0
ianslat 3 years

Celebrity magazine Hello has today sought a court injunction to prevent its rival OK! publishing photos of this week’s Leveson enquiry. ‘We’ve paid millions for exclusive rights’ explained...

I'm a Celebrity contestants claim their conversations are being listened to. 2
Ian Searle 3 years
Lower End Of Fleet Street To Cut Out Reporters......... 0
Jesse Bigg 3 years

..And sell toilet paper to man in the street...

Kim Kardashian's bottom blamed for economic crisis 0
Shandy 3 years

Kim Kardashian's curvy derrière appears to be the latest scapegoat for the economic crisis, as government officials have revealed that every meeting they have about the economy just turns into an...

Deer more recognisable than haggis in Scotland 0
grottymonty 3 years

Report claims that the deer is now the most recognisable Scottish wild animal...

Shock as psychic Russel Grant fails to predict the demise of his own career 0
Shandy 3 years

A wave of shock has swept the psychic world as esteemed medium Russel Grant failed to predict the slow erosion of his own pitiful career. Psychic Grant has made a living from issuing vague...

Victoria Beckham finally smiles after pout surgery 0
vertical 3 years

poutectomy?...

"What do you mean, he isn't a dwarf?!" asks stunned Merchant 0
medici2471 3 years
Mrs Alan Johnson also faces the sack 3
medici2471 3 years
Come Dine With Me voiceover to I Have A Dream speech 'may have been a mistake' 0
Oxbridge 3 years

Campaigners have admitted that, in retrospect, they should not have invited comedy voicover actor Dave Lamb to supply a series of camp and sarcastic interjections during Dr Martin Luther King's...

Problem looms over poor cloth making machines 0
apepper 3 years

Many British cloth making machines are faulty. Asked if this problem was looming a spokesman said, "That's what I've just said, cloth ears."...

Pat Sharp explains he actually said he would "dismember and burn JEDWOOD!" 0
Ian Searle 3 years

Country rallies behind him...

Atheist Pavlovian researcher launches Salivation Army. 6
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

Hat-tip to Medici...