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Anne Widecombe to be made Peer "Baroness Doris of Karloff". More soon. 1
Al OPecia 3 years
Newsbiscuit Journalist Sacked for Reporting on Newsbiscuit's Existence 5
bonjonelson 3 years

Former Newsbiscuit journalist, Immunis, was escorted off the premises by senior Editoral staff today. An initial statement from site owner John O'Farrell simply stated that 'Immunis is leaving the...

Newsbiscuit Journalist Sacked for Reporting Real Story 4
Immunis 3 years

‘The pressure to write witty entertainment and worthy puns got too much to bear, eventually I cracked and let everybody down’, claimed Anon1mess, The famed Newsbiscuit journalist and writer of...

Widdecombe: Clegg's Conservative initiation the final straw 0
irregular apple 3 years

Ann Widdecombe much loved entertainer with the voice of an Anglican choirboy whose testicles are partially descended, has today rubbished claims that David Cameron's omission from her annual...

UK Farters urged to get insurance 1
button 3 years

Not having a comprehensive policy could prove costly, UK trumpers have been warned by the Governing Union For Farters. It says those involved in an accident, or found responsible for causing one,...

Police warn clubbers of the risks of "legal" high-fives. 0
bonjonelson 3 years

[more soon]...

Piers Morgan breeds 0
Shandy 3 years

World panics...

Medical breakthrough as umbilical cord replaced with wireless broadband. 0
MADJEZ 3 years
Johnson admits world cup strategy was to pass to the big bloke in the centre 0
Shandy 3 years

Martin Johnson has been forced to admit that England's entire rugby world cup strategy was based upon the idea of passing to 'the big foreign bloke in the centre' who seems to scare people. "We were...

Government to appoint minister to have arguments with John Humphries 5
greg various 3 years
'British Plumbers out of sync with clients' claims trading standards 1
Immunis 3 years

Just fixed the bath tap and this cheesy line popped into my head...

Teletubbies to stand in for Border Officials at Heathrow. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 3 years
Patients urge govt. to reconsider asking civil servants to stand in for surgeons 13
3 years
Benefit cheat 'Disabled' man danced at wedding in Cana of Galilee 0
button 3 years
Egyptian protests blamed on The Bangles 5
Sinnick 3 years
‘The Riots’ stage show is to be followed up by ‘Rape! – The Musical’ 3
kimllfixit 3 years

The release of a politically-charged show in London’s Tricycle theatre based on the recent riots has already triggered frantic scribbles by other playwrights wanting to use ‘Broken Britain’...

L’oreal customers will have to prove ‘they’re worth it’. 0
Flexicon 3 years

Following on from the enormous success of their advertising slogan - ‘L’oreal: because I’m worth it’ – the cosmetics giant has announced that from 2012, women will be required to prove they...

December expected to be the most average for 200 years 2
apepper 3 years

The meteological office has predicted that Britain will be in the grip of the most typical winter weather since records began. "We haven't had a typical December for many years.", explained a...

wrong bloke. Oops. 7
3 years
Apple stores to honor black friday by doubling all prices 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Euro Vision team set to tune-up economy during crisis 5
Username 3 years

Leaked minutes from a high-level meeting of European government leaders in Belgium has proved an embarrassing reminder to Europeans that their politicians do not necessarily all sing from the same...

Man stays on web page after seeing ‘Leave Page/Stay on Page’ pop-up 4
Qoxiivi 3 years

Lee Hall, from Orpington, has become the first ever person to stay on a web page after having been confronted with the ‘Leave Page/Stay on Page’ pop-up. The solitary click marks a stunning...

New government scheme creates jobs for 16 17 year olds. More soon. 2
dominic_mcg 3 years
Moves to ban 'vajazzling' as doctors discover gigantic cyst in woman's vagina 0
Flexicon 3 years

When 38-year-old Tracey Irving went to her beauty salon for a Brazilian wax, she never dreamed it would have catastrophic results. Tracey explains: "After my therapist had finished she sprinkled...

IOW farmer ridicules wind farm: "as if we don't have enough wind already" 0
Nick McCarr 3 years
Adele to deliver Royal Institution Christmas Lecture 0
Mrblacker 3 years

In a shock move, the Royal Institution has announced its annual Christmas lecture will be delivered by the pop singer Adele. Entitled "Inflammable Precipitation", the 23 year old will expound on her...

Widespread demands for inquiry into claims Sienna Miller is an actress 1
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Levi goes back to his Roots after tasty 'Reggae Reggae' sauce drama. 0
Bryan with a Y 3 years

High Court Judge branded him a jerk...

David Beckham trapped in a clothes horse... 5
John Ffitch-Rucker 3 years

Another child on the way...

BBC to bring back "One Man and his Dog"....BENTON!!!!! 4
Son of Barnabas 3 years