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Joe Public in Name Change

Joe Public of Worthrop, Lincs, has decided enough is enough and has now officially changed his name., "Years of media references to me, how uneducated, ignorant, oblivious and altogether ambivalent...

3
Flugelbinder 29.08.13 5:04pm
A.A.Arkwright
Miliband to Legalise and Regulate 'Dogging' following Swiss Sex Drive-In Success

In an attempt to boost the ratings of his party, Labour Leader Ed Miliband vows to push through legislation which will make 'Dogging' legal, safe and enjoyable for the masses. Using the Swiss model...

0
jsparrow 29.08.13 4:48pm
jsparrow
Rolf Harris to Didgeridoo Time

More at the next sunarise!...

5
davetwojackets 29.08.13 3:22pm
davetwojackets
G4 Prison Vans to carry 70's Celeb on Board sticker on back window

Hat tip culchavutcha...

0
Scronnyglonkle 29.08.13 2:48pm
Scronnyglonkle
Cheryl Cole Hits Bum Note

Cheryl Cole is allegedly satisfied that her mission has been accomplished and she is in the news again following the completion of her tattoo. More importantly to her however, is that now when people...

0
Flugelbinder 29.08.13 1:46pm
Flugelbinder
I told my GP I was worried about getting Alzheimers, but he told me to forget it 5
John Wiltshire 29.08.13 1:44pm
FOAD
Gareth 'bails' on Madrid switch over personal terms.

Gareth Bale’s tediously drawn out transfer to Real Madrid was scrapped at the eleventh hour owing to the personal terms Madrid demanded in the contract. The squeaky voiced winger explained in an...

0
cinnahmon 29.08.13 1:22pm
cinnahmon
UN to draft Cyrus resolution

The United Nations Security Council has confirmed that it will draft a resolution on possible military action in Miley Cyrus following her alleged crimes against humanity at this year's Video Music...

1
Grover 29.08.13 1:01pm
AReader
Baby On Board badge makers introduce new slogans

“Not preg just fat” and “we used a condom” are two of the slogans under consideration by Transport for London and other UK urban transport operators. "Baby on Board was an instant hit for...

0
CulchaVulcha 29.08.13 12:35pm
CulchaVulcha
Stairway to Parkhurst 0
sydalg 29.08.13 12:15pm
sydalg
We can tell what it is now. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 29.08.13 12:08pm
dominic_mcg
Assad produces compelling evidence of Labours military guilt 0
Backup Brian 29.08.13 11:28am
Backup Brian
‘Do I know what it is yet? It's starting to look like a stretch in Parkhurst’... 0
Tripod 29.08.13 11:20am
Tripod
Primark launches new line inspired by what Mrs Dowding wore yesterday

High Street retailer Primark has launched its new clothing line inspired by what Mrs Dowding, 78, of Banbury, wore yesterday., The range features polyester cardigans, flowery skirts, spotty tops and...

0
Sfox 29.08.13 11:17am
Sfox
Russia And China Block UN Action Against DEFRA Over Badger Cull 0
Titus 29.08.13 11:00am
Titus
'It Wasn't Us' Says DEFRA 'Other, Terrorist Badgers Shot Them'

More lies later...

0
Titus 29.08.13 10:57am
Titus
Lions, Eagles & Giraffes Postpone Threatened Strike Against UK Over Badger Cull

More prevarication later...

0
Titus 29.08.13 10:54am
Titus
New 4G network means you can be a saddo faster

Launching their new 4G network today, a spokesman for Vodafone and O2 hailed it as a huge leap forward. 'This pointless waste of time and money is for serious saddos only,' said Mark McKenzie of...

4
John Wiltshire 29.08.13 10:52am
John Wiltshire
Shock And Outrage As Farage Rejects Syria Jingoism 0
Titus 29.08.13 10:38am
Titus
Confusion of nationalities as Pekingese served in Korean restaurant 0
sydalg 29.08.13 10:14am
sydalg
Badgers "still have sporting chance" if they avoid Stockwell Tube Station 0
sydalg 29.08.13 10:14am
sydalg
Grammar fascists’ invade News-Biscuit, 14
godly1966 29.08.13 10:07am
FOAD
Brian 'badger' May defends badger atrocities

Chief Badger Defender Brian 'badger' May : 'Yes, Tommy 'TB' Brock killed 37,500 cows last year, but cows are bastards and deserve everything they get. Have you not tried badger milk? Delicious.'...

0
Mfilbee 29.08.13 9:59am
Mfilbee
Cabinet votes in favour of considering doing something about Syria. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 29.08.13 9:22am
dominic_mcg
The question no-one dares ask: Why don't meerkat toys look like the CGI ones?

A 3-year old child today asked the question which everyone has been thinking but no-one has dared to say: Why are the meerkat toys shown on the Compare the Market adverts not like the CGI meerkats? ...

0
John Wiltshire 29.08.13 8:50am
John Wiltshire
Zeta Jones to concentrate on Being Welsh again 0
Scronnyglonkle 29.08.13 8:45am
Scronnyglonkle
Obama threatens to get his dad on Assad

He Started it...

0
Scronnyglonkle 29.08.13 8:41am
Scronnyglonkle
Kill your people with normal guns, please

As evidence suggests the Assad regime has used chemical weapons against Syrian civilians, Western leaders are standing shoulder-to-shoulder to insist he slaughter his people using conventional...

0
grumblechops 29.08.13 8:10am
grumblechops
Government to ban innuendo and double entendres

The government today announced its intention to ban the use of innuendo and double entenders in public. The spokesman from the Department Of General Guidance, Information, Neologisms and Grammar, Mr...

5
John Wiltshire 29.08.13 7:01am
John Wiltshire
Men still not complaining about lack of real men's body shapes in catalogues

Men have still not taken offence at the way clothing firms market clothes for an idealised body shape that the vast majority of them don't have - and it could lead to Britain sleepwalking into a...

0
ronseal 29.08.13 6:57am
ronseal