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God appears on old vegetable box. 0
robzrob 3 years


Royal corgi to get state funeral 10
Gerontius 3 years

David Cameron has announced there is to be three days of mourning, a public holiday and a state funeral in memory of Monty Windsor one of the Royal corgis who sadly passed away over the weekend.,...

Council sends in bailiffs as Richard theThird's car park bill exceeds £1m 1
custard cream 3 years
The Coal Hole In The Wall Gang Not Dead - Just Resting 18
Martin Shuttlecock 3 years

Reports emerging from the Strand appear to be suggesting that the 'Coal Hole In The Wall Gang' - a crowd of slathering, mewling, puking, folding itinerant internet trolls, are not in fact dead, but...

GCSE exams to be replaced with Top Trumps, says Gove. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 3 years
Teachers' parents will be fined if teachers bunk off on strike days... 0
deskpilot3 3 years
‘Let me commit career-suicide without dignity’ pleads Frankie Boyle 8
Skylarking 3 years

Infamous 'taboo busting' comedian Frankie Boyle issued a distraught plea to the media yesterday; asking to be allowed to finally kill off his TV career. Boyle has requested that his...

Helen Skelton reminds parade viewers that 2016 games will be held in Brasil 0
MrQ 3 years
Spare Olympic medals to be sold off on ebay 0
grottymonty 3 years
Lord Coe finds what is actually written on the bottom of British products is... 0
Smart Alex 3 years

"Open other end"...

3 arrested in Delhi with Primates hidden in pants, Catholic church no comment 0
simonjmr 3 years
Tour of Britain race to overnight at Knowsley 0
Sinnick 3 years

Paralympics has lame closing ceremony 2
Sinnick 3 years
Schoolchildren refuse NUT plan for unauthorised days off in term time 0
charlies_hat 3 years
Lib-Dems dream of Parelection gold 3
Squudge 3 years

In the wake of the inspirational Paralympics, Nick Clegg has called for a 'Parelection' following the next General Election, to provide a level playing field for politicians of all abilities. "It...

Zombie Apocalypse is actually the Second Coming, Jesus reveals 7
Squudge 3 years

In a surprise appearance last week, a man claiming to be Jesus revealed that the much anticipated 'zombie apocalypse' of 2012 is actually a mis-communication of the intended 'Second Coming'. Jesus...

Boris Johnson in a bid to become Doctor Who 4
Perks 3 years

Following weeks of speculation, the office for the Mayor of London has confirmed that Boris Johnson will make an attempt to overthrow Matt Smith and become Doctor Who. If successful, Boris will...

Paralympians to be classified by morality of disability 4
pitflaps 3 years

Paralympic athletes are to be assessed according to how culpable they are for their disabilities. Though the competition already possesses a classification system, it only categorizes the type...

A Modest Proposal: Castration at Birth 21
sylkron 3 years

In 1729, Jonathan Swift penned a satirical essay entitled "A Modest Proposal," which advocated that poor people decrease their burden on society by selling their children to the rich, to be "stewed,...

Renowned Philosophical Intellectual Sage Admits She's Never Voted In Her Life 1
Martin Shuttlecock 3 years

Leading philosopher and intellectual, Lesley C. Champion stated yesterday in a hastily adjourned meeting at the UN in New York City, that although she's a flag carrying torch bearer for, amongst...

Richard III car park dig finds early Plantagenet wheel clamp. More soon. 7
deskpilot3 3 years
Cameron offers Clegg the use of his cabin at Yosemite. 2
deskpilot3 3 years
Extra in Paralympic closing ceremony admits to being a bit 'too enthusiastic' 0
simonjmr 3 years
Paralympics ends with huge party where everyone gets legless 0
JohnA 3 years

Is that the time? I'll get my coat...

Dementia symptoms cast cruelly ironic shadow over Wombles’ song re-release plan 0
nickb 3 years

“Remember, remember, remember, remember, remember, remember, remember, remember, remember you’re a….sorry. Can we go again? Not quite sure what happened there! Dried completely! My fault”...

Orchestral concert ruined by chants of "you're not singing any more" 0
apepper 3 years

More to follow...

Mixed news on economy; big business down 3%, cat business up 2% 0
apepper 3 years

Economists are considering their response to the latest statistics for business. A treasury spokesman explained; "Obviously we'd like more from big business as that improves tax receipts, but with...

5 year old rules out negotiations with parents over teddy bear hostages 11
ianslat 3 years

A five year old girl from Shepton Mallet has today reiterated that on no account will she negotiate with hostage takers. The statement was made by Phoebe Taylor following speculation that she may be...

Paralympics closing : Giant alarm clock to wake up crowd after Coldplay perform. 1
MADJEZ 3 years

More Zzzzzooon...

Overweight co-workers plan skimmed milk move 1
BAJDixon 3 years

It was confirmed this morning that local office worker Sally Gibson is to move from semi-skimmed to skimmed milk in an effort to lose weight. Ms Gibson was heard loudly confirming the rumours to...