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FIFA agrees to release corruption report details 'to highest bidder' 3
throngsman 7 minutes
Party of teachers finally settles restaurant bill from 2013 Christmas lunch 0
deceangli 14 minutes

A group of teachers has agreed how to allocate the bill from their 2013 Christmas lunch, just in time to book into the same restaurant for their 2014 event. ‘I know it sounds like a small sum to...

New feminist game invented. 'Snog, marry or wait 20 years and accuse of rape." 6
vulture1 1 hour

Or even better all three...

Every object to include a camera by 2020 6
deceangli 1 hour

EU commissioners have vowed to outlaw the practice of manufacturing objects without inbuilt cameras. ‘What if a cretin wants to take a selfie with a stapler?’ asked a spokesman. ‘Or a dildo?...

Kim Jong Un cuts himself shaving, head deflates with a bang 0
sydalg 1 hour
Demonisation of Enoch Powell complete. Kids believe he was same as Hitler 18
vulture1 2 hours

Patriot, war-hero, MP, democrat, family man, given to expressing honest opinions but worst of all Tory, Enoch Powell's name is now used as a cheap jibe by comedians and left wing politicians while...

Pentagon release 'Proportional Response' to Sony hack 0
throngsman 2 hours

"We've infiltrated their computer network," said Chuck Geldings, speaking on behalf of the Pentagon, "and with the help of the NSA we've replaced all copies of Microsoft Office with Google Chrome. If...

UN to intervene in Christmas card dispute 1
throngsman 2 hours

UN Secretary General Ban Ki-moon has called a special meeting of the UN Security Council as a result of an escalation in the long-running dispute raised by the Independent State of 32 Acacia Gardens...

Korean leader has sex change, becomes Kim Jong Une 2
sydalg 2 hours
Retailers prepare for 'F#*k It, This Will Do' Wednesday 3
cinnahmon 2 hours

As shoppers battle through 'Panic Saturday' when an expected £1.2 billion will be spent on festive shopping, store managers are already preparing for the next few days before Christmas Day. The...

Animal rights campaigners claim rabbits were photoshopped for advert. More soon 0
dominic_mcg 4 hours
Sony to release "The Interview" on Betamax. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 4 hours
Sony to launch follow-up film to be called "The Investigation" 0
Sinnick 5 hours
"Too many Cooks" say England cricket selectors as they drop the captain 0
cinnahmon 5 hours
Hereford United affair 'a bit of a wind up' admits mischievous judge 2
nickb 7 hours
"Paddington" pulled after studio boss hears growling outside bedroom window 0
sydalg 7 hours
University students ‘ecstatic’ on returning to parents’ home 3
TobiasBV 8 hours

The nation’s university students are said to be ‘overjoyed’ to have escaped the oppression and abject tedium of government-funded piss-ups and sexual exploration, and returned home to the...

Daily Express To Become A Newspaper - Possibly 0
Titus 10 hours

Obama’s retaliation to Sony hack: The Interview 2 will feature Adam Sandler 0
Fake News Agency 18 hours

and Brew Barrymore. More Soon…...

Defiant Pakistani School Children Show Sony How To Stand Up To Bullies 0
Titus 19 hours
Millions regret not saying 'Phantom Menace' insulted North Korea 1
apepper 19 hours

More to follow...

LittleGreenMenPeace Warns 'Methane Will Cause Martian Warming'. 3
Titus 19 hours

LittleGreenMenPeace has joined the Friends of Mars in protesting about bursts of methane gas which have been detected on Mars. "This Martian-made pollution will amost certainly lead to climate...

Obama sends back his Walkman 0
nickb 19 hours
Queen's speech is really a nectarine, says palace insider. More soon. 2
dominic_mcg 21 hours
FBI accuse 'Micky Mouse State' for Sony hack, Sony to sue Disney 0
throngsman 22 hours
Cinemagoers ecstatic as Sony confirms ‘Annie 2 – The Assassination’ to go ahead 0
Dick Everyman 22 hours
Archaeologists uncover Biblical-era Take a Sabbath magazine 1
Adrian Bamforth 23 hours

Critics beg Kim Jong-un to hack Night at the Museum 3 0
nickb 1 day
Wound up Hereford United was running like clockwork, says chairman. More soon 0
dominic_mcg 1 day
Women bishops to be allowed after demonstrating "killer instinct" 0
apepper 1 day

More to follow...