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Welcome to the NewsBiscuit Writers' Room 0 Nice Admin Lady 02.12.13 11:19pm
Nice Admin Lady
'Horses evolving emotions faster than Tories' say experts

Scientists at the University of Sussex say domestic animals such as dogs and horses are evolving emotions at a faster rate than people who identify as Tory., Research shows that animals are able to...

Gerontius 10.02.16 9:33am
Dick Everyman
Republicans to give up Trump for Lent

After millions gorged themselves silly on pancakes on Shrove Tuesday to use up the sinful ingredients they are giving up for Lent, there is some hope the Republicans are giving up voting for Donald...

StanleyMizaru 10.02.16 9:20am
Youtube of The Year shows amazing moment missile blows up a maggot that was.....

Footage of a guided missile, that exposes hundreds of dead rats, which turn out to be infested by maggots, has won the coveted Youtube video of the Year Award (horror category). It narrowly beat the...

ronseal 10.02.16 8:15am
Aspiring Evil Villain To Buy Irish Cold War Bunker

February 9th, 2016, Ballymena, NORTHERN IRELAND- Professor Cyrus Blackthorne, a self-described psychotic misanthrope and avid Hello Kitty memorabilia collector, has made it known that he plans to...

Takos1021 10.02.16 10:26am
Age UK to clarify that energy prices include a substantial donation.

More mis-selling soon...

deskpilot3 09.02.16 11:04pm
The Jump merges with 24 Hours in A&E 2
Dick Everyman 10.02.16 9:22am
Dick Everyman
Man on fire at Kensington Palace victim of candle in the wind. 1
MADJEZ 09.02.16 10:59pm
Dick Everyman
Kim Sears declares this one is definitly...'out!' 1
irreverendJ 09.02.16 11:02pm
Dick Everyman
Academy of Motion Picture Arts considered Stallone boycott. 1
deskpilot3 09.02.16 11:03pm
Dick Everyman
Jeremy Hunt unable to get an appointment to talk to Junior Doctors. 0
deskpilot3 09.02.16 8:33pm
Footbal fans buy kit then burn it saying it's too expensive 0
Dun Dunkin 09.02.16 8:17pm
Dun Dunkin
Channel 4 show The Jump to be renamed The Slide 1
Adrian Bamforth 09.02.16 11:07pm
Dick Everyman
North Korea edging upwards towards Trump on the Thermometer of Barking Madness. 0
Al OPecia 09.02.16 5:51pm
Al OPecia
Gigantic sperm found on Wales beach 0
farmer giles 09.02.16 5:29pm
farmer giles
C4 to conduct review into The Jump "because it's shit"

Hopefully no more soon...

johnnydobbo 09.02.16 2:47pm
Coffee worker wins dyslexia case. Says "Thank God, I was sick of chardonnay" 0
NotNowCato 09.02.16 1:43pm
Newsreaders instructed to scowl and spit after mentioning ‘so called’ ISIS

In a bid to step up faltering support for their policies in Syria, the Government has instructed news organisations that all broadcasters must spit and sneer whenever ‘so called’ ISIS, Islamic...

Stan and Des 10.02.16 8:18am
Stan and Des
RMT announces date of next tube strike cancellation 0
Stan and Des 09.02.16 12:25pm
Stan and Des
Opera strike not over until the fat lady sings 0
Dun Dunkin 09.02.16 11:53am
Dun Dunkin
Kim Sears confirms that she was impregnated by the second seed 0
medici2471 09.02.16 11:11am
Starbucks signs cheque "Bartsucks" 0
sydalg 09.02.16 10:56am
Andy Murray's daughter expected to be British number 1 'within weeks' 1
harrypalmer 09.02.16 10:52am
'More 100mph storms likely if Britain leaves EU' warns Cameron

David Cameron has warned British voters to expect even more storms to batter the country if they choose to leave the EU. 'We can expect the French to tear up our agreement with them to keep the...

ianslat 09.02.16 4:19pm
Koh-i-Noor to be set into Oxford Rhodes statue. That'll learn 'em. 1
beckfordburger 09.02.16 3:01pm
Chancellor admits having sex with taxpayers 0
Dun Dunkin 09.02.16 8:34am
Dun Dunkin
Wife blames Met Office as Storm Mitchell rips through marital bed

A Surrey housewife has blamed the Met Office for her husband naming his “storms of flatulence.” Susan Richards was speaking after Storm Mitchell was unleashed under the duvet this morning just...

StanleyMizaru 09.02.16 8:22am
Dyslexic Starbucks employee says tribunal win 'better latte than never' 5
harrypalmer 09.02.16 10:06am
Deepcut parent charged with ‘wasting police indifference’

Des James, father of Private Cheryl James who died in mysterious circumstances at Deepcut Barracks, has apologised to Surrey Police for asking them to investigate her death properly. “With...

deceangli 09.02.16 8:07am
Dyslexic Barrister sues Starbucks for loss of court earnings 1
maxey 09.02.16 8:18am
Stabrucks employee wins dyslexia case 0
Dick Everyman 09.02.16 7:45am
Dick Everyman