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RIP Peter Falk

Just seen the bad news that Peter Falk has died. He was a great actor and made Columbo a fantastic character. He managed to inject comedy into the role by not taking himself too seriously. He was a...

6 antharrison 25.06.11 6:49pm
I think I may be a homeophobe

That “memories are made of piss” story (c. Qoxiivi) got me thinking and now I’ve confused myself., If a homeopathifist dilutes substance “x” to one part in a million and then divides the...

16 beau-jolly 25.06.11 2:23pm
Nice Osama, FP, Oxy. 0 rikkor 25.06.11 2:13pm
Whatever happened to the Ebbsfleet Horse?

Has it bolted?...

1 riesler 24.06.11 5:31pm
Teacher strikes

If I was a teacher, I would consider striking over: - Hours spent filling in mountains of forms, - unfair recruitment process, - attacks on staff by pupils, - poor pay, - idiotic parents blaming...

19 24.06.11 5:30pm
Suggestions anyone? Hope I don't offend anyone with a link to the Daily Mail...

1 riesler 24.06.11 4:45pm
Enjoyed the FP Ian.

Let me guess,the British dad is the one on the left letting one rip before the start ?...

1 saltire 24.06.11 11:42am
Can anyone spot the fundamental flaw in the following from the BBC News website?

"A member of the rebels' National Transitional Council (NTC) in Benghazi revealed they were holding secret talks to prepare for the regime's fall."...

4 Al OPecia 24.06.11 11:20am
Mr Payne
What do you think we should entitle a 'gomorrah' ?

Why should sodom get all the fun? Here's an excellent word just waiting to be employed. Anyone got a nice definition for gomorrah?...

9 Ironduke 24.06.11 10:19am
Who, or what, are Kardashians?

They sound like some kind of malevolent race from Star Trek. "Jim, we've arrived at the home world of the Kardashians." "Don't worry Bones, I'll beam down and handle them myself" But seriously...

3 bonjonelson 23.06.11 10:54pm
...and she woke up and it was all a dream...

Hello powers that be. Thanks for using my ABC story as a Left Alert. It was lovely to have this on the front page for so long. But where has it gone now? I've looked under Left Alert archive and...

9 DrTurmoil 23.06.11 1:59pm
Today's FP picture

Has there ever been a better photo than that? Answers on a postcard. Extraordinary work Red...

5 OllieP 23.06.11 8:37am
Dam Buster story

There may already be a thread dedicated to this, but I would like to congratulate Rick Westwell and Ironduke for their thoroughly entertaining Dam Busters FP. Most entertaining and frightfully...

3 JayGee 22.06.11 9:33pm
Int Space Station outraged over biennial rubbish collection

More in two years?...

2 Erlang 22.06.11 2:28pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Dog sentenced to death by stoning by rabbinical court Guess the judge trod in dog shit on the way to work that morning?...

5 Ironduke 21.06.11 11:13pm
The Radio 1 DJ Graveyard .... Smooth FM

Struggling down the M6 looking for local traffic reports, I happened upon Smooth FM when I hear Kid Jensen. Oh dear god, but worse, the breakfast show is hosted by Simon Bates, still offering up Our...

21 brownpaperreporter 21.06.11 6:51pm
Lobster Week

Tonight it's lobster Newburg, but without any parmesan cheese. Cheese is not great with seafood. Lots of sherry, asparagus as a side. In keeping with my rough, colonial upbringing, I will leave...

6 rikkor 21.06.11 6:14pm
father christmas ticker...

Just seen the Father Christmas/absent father ticker. But every year, he drinks the sherry we put out for him, and then drives his sleigh. I know what that makes him...

3 21.06.11 12:49pm
Tracey Emin to design 2012 Olympic posters

"I'm thinking maybe something tasteful like a wino pissing on the Olympic flame."...

2 riesler 21.06.11 10:48am
What's all this about 'Project Vulva'...?

Story there anyone? Maybe a bit late...

20 Scroat 21.06.11 8:57am
The SugarTits thing is over.

Just let it go. An attempt to be funny, but it lacked staying power...

15 rikkor 21.06.11 8:57am
The All New Jeni B
Spinal Tap or Bad News?

I saw something online where people said they actually prefered the Comic Strip PresentsBad News over This Is Spinal Tap. I couldn't believe anyone could favour the pale Channel 4 imitation of the...

6 ゴルゴ13 20.06.11 10:43pm
Negotiations with the Taliban are 'going well'. How can they tell?

They said on the news that the CIA is talking to the Taliban and that 'negotiations are going well' This intrigues me. They're not notably emotive people are they? If you were negotiating with...

19 ronseal 20.06.11 5:41pm
Today's Archive FP

Really enjoyed the archive story about the over-competitive Dad who badly broke his son's leg during a violent game of football in the back garden, with the stand-out line being: "We tried a bit of...

4 OllieP 20.06.11 5:29pm
reservoir drained after man wees in it

[url=]taking the water[/url] Presumably, the...

12 20.06.11 1:56pm
Conan O'Brien's 2011 Dartmouth College Commencement Address

Just brilliant.

3 OllieP 20.06.11 1:54pm
Shit Ads

"You are the 1.000.000 user This is no joke" Really? I mean, really...

3 BillyBitzer 20.06.11 1:34pm
Just read this in an email from a colleague and laughed...

"and then couldn’t get my phone to work on the Isle of Wight this weekend."...

1 Qoxiivi 20.06.11 10:34am
The All New Jeni B
Just killed some lobsters.

If you're worried about dropping them live into boiling water (I'm not), plunge a big knife into the shell right behind their eyes. Works like a charm. We're having Porterhouse steaks on the grill...

8 rikkor 19.06.11 10:18pm
The All New Jeni B
What is Soylent Green made of again? I keep forgetting. 0 rikkor 19.06.11 9:46pm