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Football Match believed to have been played

It is understood that a football match may have been played at a venue somewhere that may or may not have been in Europe, however a "super-injunction" is believed to have been filed preventing the...

0 TheDeedle 27.04.11 7:37am
You're wrong, and you're a grotesquely ugly freak!

As today is the anniversary of 1994, what better time than to post a few news headlines from The Day Today. Bouncing Elephantiasis Woman destroys Central Portsmouth., Bryan Ferry Bathmat Dangerous...

13 bonjonelson 26.04.11 6:33pm
So terribly modern

My new computer can log me on to NB with my fingerprint. Should help stop "drunk dialing" posts...

4 rikkor 26.04.11 1:27pm
Boring, lazy FP.

Oh, sorry. I meant great job, NB...

1 rikkor 25.04.11 10:23am
I read up on AV voting.

I saw it mentioned a couple of times here and didn't know what it is. Now I do, and I'm sorry...

4 rikkor 24.04.11 10:57pm
Dear Diary,

Sorry I haven’t made an entry for a while, but Mrs Umpire and I have been away for a few days to the Isle of Wight. I must record in these pages how modern technology completely confounded me in a...

0 theumpire 24.04.11 10:43pm
Yes, he was a bit careless, but still a bit of a harsh headline

2 FormerlyAlOPecia 24.04.11 9:12pm
Royal Wedding FP damn you Newsbiscuit.

OK great FP, I have just sent my 'Kate Middletons father to pay half' sub off to the scrapyard. I was doing in readyness for Friday., Mine had her father forgetting he'd drunkenly agreed to pay half...

0 MADJEZ 24.04.11 7:37am
Happy St George's Day.

Nice to see all the English theme pubs in Dublin decorated with their George Cross Flags and real ale on tap...

2 wallster 23.04.11 12:38pm
Happy Easter to all my reader

Think I might lock up and go home soon., A group of pasty looking people in anaraks just marched past with a solitary drum and a bloody great cross. Don't tell me the God-botherers are trying to...

2 beau-jolly 22.04.11 2:09pm

I got this message on Facebook today. Help a Friend, Des Custard, Suggest friends for him. I suggested Kim Jong-Il, Rupert Murdoch, Charles Manson and Baroness Thatcher for you. I think you'll...

0 rikkor 22.04.11 2:03pm
Trubiscuit - We can't compete with this.


2 MADJEZ 22.04.11 10:15am
The All New Jeni B
Need help on a potential story

Hello peoples. I've just seen that Muslims Against Crusades are seeking permission to protest near Westminster Abbey on the royal wedding day. The English Defence League have warned that if they are...

9 Vertically Challenged Giant 22.04.11 9:22am
Its grim oop north!

4 beau-jolly 22.04.11 7:51am
Champions' football trophy run over by bus in Madrid

Chaotic celebrations after Real Madrid won the Copa del Rey fell a little flat when the prized trophy was dropped from the top of the ceremonial open-top bus., One of the players, Sergio Ramos,...

2 beau-jolly 21.04.11 3:45pm
OK, its last years Easter Card but its the only one I'll send

Especially for Rikkor

1 brownpaperreporter 21.04.11 2:27pm
iPhones track your every move!

[url=]iKnowwhatyoudidlastsummer[/url] Unbelievable. And I thought 'android' sounded more sinister...

6 21.04.11 2:26pm
Excellent donkey FP today.

Great work VCG and Red...

1 Stan 21.04.11 10:46am
Vertically Challenged Giant

0 riesler 21.04.11 10:23am
"At Stonehenge, take a f*cking left turn"

6 riesler 20.04.11 5:08pm
Anonymous Tagging

I thought I read on here recently that we were supposed to be seeing an end to anonymous tagging. Well some joker has been through everything I've posted and tagged it with 'No tags yet'...

1 Vertically Challenged Giant 20.04.11 1:34pm
Actual URL for an article in the independent Read the URL carefully...

7 fernandomando 19.04.11 10:08pm
EU bankers worry about Germany's offer to bail out Austria, Poland and France... 0 deskpilot3 19.04.11 7:24pm
Pitching for new business

I've just been contacting publishing houses for copyediting/proofreading work. One chap came back and said he was publishing a maths book in Japanese. His next projects are a book on Abu Dhabi in...

2 Scroat 19.04.11 3:38pm
A worthy FP

and Red up to his usual high standard. I raise my coffee cup to you all...

1 riesler 19.04.11 2:53pm
Florida. Nice.

Just in case you have never been to Florida, but thought it would be a fun, inexpensive vacation:...

7 rikkor 19.04.11 2:19pm
What better way to find out that your touch-typing skills aren't too hot?

Half way through what was (and unfortunately, still is) a terribly interesting day at work, I was researching the typical recovery periods for a fractured foot. ...

18 SingingHinny 19.04.11 2:03pm
Further proof that the world is coming to an end. Or, at the very least, should be coming to an end. Especially since 15% of girls can...

8 rikkor 19.04.11 1:39pm
Arsenal lose 1989 league title to Liverpool

A dramatic Ray Houghton goal in the 1.151×10^7th minute of injury time gave Liverpool their 18th league championship, bringing their tally to 19, while pushing Arsenal into the runner up position in...

0 eartrumpet 19.04.11 12:56am
The Wombles are not taking it anymore "What the fuck did you say about Mdm Cholet's cake?" I wonder if this could be worked into a story?...

0 the coarse whisperer 18.04.11 3:54pm
the coarse whisperer