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Cold callers

I'm very concerned about my father in law, who is border line Alzheimer's, but still managing to live at home with some support from various quarters. I was at his house recently doing some work in...

19 Scroat 02.08.12 1:37pm
This is a public service announcement

Search on Wikipedia for 'complete cunt'...

12 bonjonelson 02.08.12 10:29am
Public Outcry as Opening Ceremony 'Fails to Reflect British Culture'

The BBC has received scores of complaints from viewers upset about Danny Boyles Olympic opening ceremony. William Tapin of Basingstoke wrote;, 'It was a travesty, the bit with Mr Bean in it was OK...

0 Totty 01.08.12 3:33am
Paralympic Revamp to Include Paralytics

In an attempt to boost stadium ticket sales for the London 2012 Paralympics, LOCOG have announced that in addition to the traditional T and F competition categories, a new K category will be added....

1 George Harvey Bone 31.07.12 7:20pm
Even the Chinese spammers are on drugs today

This mornings tosh must have set a new world record...

2 Gerontius 31.07.12 9:41am
Record weekend for Centrica

Centrica's profits soared this weekend following an unexplained surge in gas consumption shortly after 11pm on Friday in the east London area...

0 ron.bruce 30.07.12 12:47pm
Olympic medals

From Barclays commodity research note: “Olympic medals use a lot of metal but these days the gold medal is mostly silver. The silver medal is sterling silver while the bronze is largely copper. The...

1 button 30.07.12 12:32pm
‎'US supreme court rules death is bad'

In a shock ruling America's lawmakers have voted five to four that dying later is better than dying sooner. On hearing the news the grim reaper was said to have thrown down his scythe, flipped over...

1 boleroscaramanga 29.07.12 7:17pm
Cheshire Cat
Anybody else use Pet Insurance?

No: 1 cat's renewal just arrived with 25% hike FFS. Is this par for the course? Rant over. Thank you for listening. Hmm, may be a sub in there when I calm down...

18 dvo4fun 29.07.12 5:55pm
Great FP! 0 rikkor 29.07.12 2:07pm
Benny Hill theme song played during women's beach volleyball!


1 Yikes 29.07.12 8:36am
Most optimistic Olympic coverage

As heard on BBC. "We'll be bringing you interviews with all the British medal winners". Well, let's hope they've got a few old episodes of "Dads Army" to fill the gaps in air time then...

0 Quaz 28.07.12 9:38pm
I know it ay have been said before but... - 2


35 Scroat 28.07.12 7:36pm
Jesus and Jeremy Clarkson's teeth

I wrote it and I'm very pleased to see that someone kindly edited it to make funny and then it was published. My first ever appearance on the homepage, couldn't be more chuffed. But I don't...

1 Carter 28.07.12 6:17pm
BBC Passive Aggressive Headlines

"Britain's Cavendish fails to shine" - because you had go on the Tour de France just before the Olympics, you moron...

0 JohnA 28.07.12 4:51pm
Pictures that are inspiRED.

I have really enjoyed some of the FP pictures over the last week. Meerkat in an envelope and today's gunsmoke with the copyright mark for example. So what's everyone favourite RED masterpiece??...

12 Perks 28.07.12 6:18am
Satire becomes reality....

Remember 'Original Sugababes form Sugababes tribute band'? They have now reformed, doing pretty much that?...

1 Oxbridge 28.07.12 6:17am
Last call for pre-Olympic subs please

Come on you lot, get your priorities right...

7 dvo4fun 27.07.12 5:25pm

Has it broken? Can we have some new ones now, please?...

8 ptangyangkipperbang 27.07.12 5:21pm
Later on Jeremy Hunt will accidentally set fire to the entire opening ceremony trying to come up with witty take on bells, ends of...

2 thisisall1word 27.07.12 2:16pm
Queen tests positive for steroids disqualified from opening ceremony 0 27.07.12 9:50am
Dark Knight Rises Review

Dark Knight Rises is the latest installment of the most recent trilogy of Batman movies. It’s the third film which follows the release of two others which people went to cinemas all over the world...

9 smackbean 26.07.12 7:15pm
Nice FP. Capitalize P in "Peter's"

Yours in spell checkery...

0 rikkor 26.07.12 7:13pm
I'm new, where's the toilets?

And do I help myself to tea and coffee or do I have to chip in first? Couple more questions. Is there a best time to post in the Writer's Room? Should I be setting my alarm or staying up late, or...

20 Carter 26.07.12 9:25am
Michael Gove ate my Javelin.

Athletes gathering at the Olympic village were shocked and surprised to hear allegations from the Manager of the Cameroon team ,that Michael Gove had eaten a star athletes javelin. When asked to...

1 Kieran 25.07.12 6:18pm
Thanks Ed.

For saving me from myself witht he Dog Walking NiB. It's much better now...

0 Al OPecia 25.07.12 5:44pm
Al OPecia
Top-notch FP, W. Smithy 2 rikkor 25.07.12 3:36pm
Could somebody please remind me how to edit a submission

Many tanks. When I find out I can add the missing 'h' to the above sentence...

1 Underconstruction 25.07.12 11:54am
seymour totti
"Zil lane chaos" update

Usual 75 minute commute from Kent to Aldgate via Blackwall Tunnel usually takes 75 minutes; today was 55. Hurrah!...

3 riesler 25.07.12 10:51am
I have just been banned from Waterstones

all I did was collect up and move all their yellow "caution wet floor" signs putting them in front of the Fifty Shades of Grey display...

4 andhrimnir 25.07.12 6:09am