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Phrase of the day.

Just heard on lunchtime news. Bob Crow of the rail union. 'That's our bottom line .. in the sand' Well thats clear then ???...

5 MADJEZ 08.03.12 6:41pm
Scroat
Agnostics rewrite

Nice editing job! Works loads better than my original sub. I kind of knew where I wanted to go with it but the original didn't quite go there. So thanks for a top job!...

2 08.03.12 1:38pm
Ludicity
Ludicity...

J'aime plus votre histoire amusant de FP...

4 rikkor 08.03.12 1:30pm
Ludicity
Jedi Lightsabre frontpage

Truly brilliant, especially the pic!...

1 bonjonelson 07.03.12 12:14pm
kimllfixit
Only in Lincolnshire...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lincolnshire-17269511 Sub in this somewhere. Buggered if I know where though...

2 Scroat 07.03.12 4:25am
Username
Trousers.

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02159/trousers_2159225b.jpg...

6 John Ffitch-Rucker 06.03.12 2:51pm
beau-jolly
Lesbian action !

http://www.bbc.co.uk/nature/17117661...

6 Sinnick 06.03.12 1:16pm
pere floza
Safety test

I'm well known for being a miserable doom-and-gloom merchant. So don't be surprised: If an engineer wants to test something, it's because there's a possibility the something could fail. So, a...

0 Sinnick 06.03.12 10:34am
Sinnick
Great FP Ludicity! 1 Scroat 06.03.12 10:22am
Sinnick
Environmental Consultant: Can anyone help?

A friend of mine has had a massive oops moment with their offshore oil well in the Gulf of Mexico and would like to talk to a friendly doesn't-charge-a-huge-amount-in-fees environmental consultant....

2 bonjonelson 06.03.12 9:00am
Gerontius
Environmental Consultant: Can anyone help?

A friend of mine has had a massive oops moment with their house oil tank and would like to talk to a friendly doesn't-charge-a-huge-amount-in-fees environmental consultant. I know it's a bit cheeky...

7 shitsu_tonka 05.03.12 9:44pm
shitsu_tonka
TOG rating

Am I getting too old? I kind of miss old Tel on the radio in the mornings. I used to laugh along whilst crawling drearily up the motorway to work, just as my father had done over 20 years before.,...

8 beau-jolly 05.03.12 10:51am
seymour totti
February Writer of the Month - The Paper Ostrich

Curtsies all round to The Paper Ostrich whose story 'Nation enthralled as Kate does thing' was NewsBiscuit's most popular last month. This takes his tally of Writer of the Month awards to three,...

8 editor 05.03.12 10:06am
Qoxiivi
CNN Asks: Why does the US lead the world in school shootings?

http://globalpublicsquare.blogs.cnn.com/2012/02/28/why-does-america-lead-the-world-in-school-shootings/?hpt=hp_c1 I wonder. It's a total mystery. Anyone have any idea?...

9 bonjonelson 04.03.12 7:39pm
nickb
Front page today really good - it's pretty much true too! 4 ronseal 04.03.12 6:18pm
nickb
Suicide quip for recycling

"tried suicide last night; I nearly died! I won't be trying that again!" My (nutty) daughter tweeted this to her friends which I thought might be capable of recycling by you clever chaps and...

0 Poecheng 04.03.12 5:22pm
Poecheng
Police call for calm as meteor seen over Britain. 0 John Ffitch-Rucker 04.03.12 2:50pm
John Ffitch-Rucker
Pope's Paedo Prince Pans Poofs.

Cardinal O'Brien, Scottish head of the world's largest paedophile ring, has tried to deflect the Media's attention away from his colleagues mucky shenanigans by blaming homosexuals for the break up...

0 Sirohada 04.03.12 11:29am
Sirohada
. 0 beau-jolly 03.03.12 12:05pm
beau-jolly
Is the secret of comedy wearing a uniform?

Roger Lewis claims that older comedians: Carson, Dawson, Milligan etc were funny because they'd been in the armed forces and that comedians today aren't funny because they haven't. I'm shocked that...

6 shitsu_tonka 02.03.12 12:50am
dvo4fun
Sure helps when you are driving round in circles!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/formula1/17224431. 10 minutes later.. Bugger, they have changed the headline. It said 'Hamilton hopes to turn the corner'. Not funny now. Wasn't very funny then...

0 riesler 01.03.12 7:49pm
riesler
Badger-fisting !

An old, old friend from the archive !, The story that first drew me into NB, and still my favourite animal cruelty sub, although Wayland's kittens run it a very close second., It takes me back ...

3 FlashArry 01.03.12 5:37pm
andhrimnir
Nice FP, Perks!

Love the angle. Nice one!...

1 01.03.12 10:17am
Perks
'Funny' names in real life - 2

Just read about the Android 'evi' app, a sort of search engine for bored people. The designer is called William Tunstall-Pedoe. I guess he doesn't come to Stoke very often. Any others out there...

34 29.02.12 6:51pm
JohnA
mr editor, I done a typo!

Thanks for taking Dobbin out for a run. Could you change 'shawn' to 'shorn'? It was a howler I had in my original sub (and a pun on Sean/Shaun Hoares, the conspiracists). Ta! Sorry, my bad!...

2 29.02.12 4:11pm
rikkor
Rupert Murdoch to launch new son on Sunday. (Stolen from twitter).

Found on twitter and made me laugh and thought it belonged here somewhere .. obviously not suggesting it for a real more soon pity though ! ....

0 Not Amused 29.02.12 4:10pm
Not Amused
Northern drinks

Anyone else near Manchester? I can't manage a school night in London, anyone fancy a slap up chippy tea with gravy, followed by a pint of mild? Failing that, I can make the Bucks break-away group...

8 29.02.12 12:50am
Scroat
Mr Smithy...

What the fuck are you on? Brilliant!...

0 Scroat 29.02.12 12:48am
Scroat
USA 2012 Olympic Squirrel licking team in training

http://www.collegehumor.com/picture/60968...

2 Quaz 29.02.12 12:46am
Psycadelic Squirrel
Worth a watch if you haven't already

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b017j5jw/Old_Jews_Telling_Jokes_Episode_2/...

0 button 28.02.12 10:03pm
button